*starting* to vax at about 3 years old

[MommyMichele]

My second daughter, Caroline, who will be 3 years old in November, had the 2 month old shots, but nothing else since. I was concerned about their impact on her immune system when her eczema flared up badly at 3 months and didn't get under control until after her first birthday when we finally removed all of her allergy foods from our diets (she was reacting to what I ate through breastmilk). (And maybe her immune system being more mature helped?) I kept putting off her vaxes though, because I've read enough about them to be scared of them. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to convince DH though, and HE is taking the girls to their next doctor appointment. Rhiannon will get her 5 yo shots, completing her vaxes, and Caroline, nearly 3 years old, will start on the road to "catch up."

Has anyone else delayed vaxes this long? Anybody else dealing with food allergies? Her allergist said he wouldn't be concerned, and just follow the traditional schedule, but I'm leaning toward doing them one at a time, although that will drag it out and put her through more appointments. If it makes a difference, she hasn't had any eczema flares since she cleared up after her first birthday, but she is clearly still allergic to dairy and wheat (and we're avoiding about 10 other foods as well).

Also, I am about to give birth to a son and plan to not vax him for at least a year. Has anything been written about when is a good time to start if you're delaying vaxes, or is it generally the longer you wait, the safer it is?

[rnasmomma]

This site has some useful info on delaying vax...we're still "delaying" and my DS will be 5 soon.

http://www.mercola.com/2004/dec/29/v...n_schedule.htm

[alegna]

Why on earth are you letting your husband vaccinate if you don't agree? I know a mom who just recently did this and is VERY angry about it now.

-Angela

[MommyMichele]

Originally Posted by alegna

Why on earth are you letting your husband vaccinate if you don't agree? I know a mom who just recently did this and is VERY angry about it now.

-Angela

I have argued him into homeschooling, homebirth, not circ'ing and other things, but have not been able to do the same with vaxing. The other choices were SO easy in comparison, but the vax controversy is so complicated and overwhelming. I am SURE I want to homeschool, it has been wonderful having midwifery care this pg, I am SURE circ'ing is stupid, etc... but I'm not sure one way or the other about vax'ing. I did tell DH that he has to take all the blame if something does go wrong, and I do keep trying to get him to read some of the stuff I'm coming across. But there's just so much. It's the hardest parenting decision I've struggled with.

Anyway, I posted this purposely here on the Selective and Delayed forum so as not to be confronted about why we're vaxing! Do you have anything helpful to say with regard to my post?

[Daisie125]

I don't think she was confronting you on vaxing. She was concerned about the fact that you seem to be being bullied into the decision.

Perhaps he should do the research so he is making an informed decision. I would never let anyone make a decision about my child who wasn't well-read and well-researched.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by Daisie125

I don't think she was confronting you on vaxing. She was concerned about the fact that you seem to be being bullied into the decision.

:

You did not indicate that you thought vaccinating was a good idea. You seemed to indicate that your husband was strong-arming you. I apologize if I misread. I have a friend of a friend who was just "forced" into vaxing by her husband and is very upset about it.

-Angela

[Mamm2]

If you have waited until he was three, why is your dh concerned about him catching up?

Why not look for a holistic vax friendly ped? I think your dh sounds like mine, they only listen to the doctors! If you have a ped that is not so mainstream and holistic, he may change his mind and agree to delay some more. My ped did not say a peep about me not vaxing, she did not even ask if I wanted to vax!! Apparently when I told the receptionist, she must have made a note

My dh will not read books so...I got a video!!! There is a doctor (can't remember her name) that has this great video on vaccines.

It really helped for two reasons:
-It was a video and it was easy for him to watch. The video is not the most exciting thing in the world...but it got the message across.
-The speaker was a doctor!!

Anyhow, good luck!! Please rethink the appointment until YOU feel comfortable about the decision. Regret is a horrible thing and I still regret vaxing my ds up to his 2 months shots because I cannot take them back.

If you need the name of the video, let me know I will look it up. It is really good and informative.

[MommyMichele]

Originally Posted by Daisie125

I don't think she was confronting you on vaxing. She was concerned about the fact that you seem to be being bullied into the decision.

No, he wouldn't bully. But it's the first thing he stood up strongly about. Homeschooling only took a few discussions and a little reading. He doesn't see any problem with circ'ing but after I shared some info he agreed it's unnecessary. Homebirthing was the second hardest issue we had, but that was clouded by the fact that we had agreed to only have two children and this baby snuck in literally just weeks before dh had his vasectomy (and after my first cycle after dd#2!), so there were some high emotions around the beginning of this pg. But whereas I've talked about natural birth for years and he's become comfortable with those ideas, I have not been able to be as convincing about not vaxing. Maybe I'm not convinced myself. Just scared. So a few months ago, the most recent time I confronted him about the issue, I told him he had to do some research himself because why should I always be the one, and I was tired and exhausted and confused and overwhelmed by all I've read and collected over the last few years. So he went to the CDC website and we talked and he had arguments for every point I made and said he was going to stand firm in this decision. I was at a loss for how further to argue, so I told him he has to be the one to explain to our children someday that he's the one who insisted they be vaxed. And I can not take them to the appointments because I don't know how I can comfort them when I don't even feel sure it's the right thing to do. I'm about to hand him something new to read, something relatively short I printed off of Mercola, and remind him how we have to watch our allergic daughter closely after the vaxes and hope she doesn't have some horrible reaction which is going to be even harder to deal with because we're about to have a newborn in the house...

Okay, I'm rambling... But CONFUSION is what this topic is for me. My brain gets fuzzy trying to read the information. It's not as clear cut as any of the other AP/natural/crunchy things I choose to do.

[MommyMichele]

Originally Posted by alegna

You did not indicate that you thought vaccinating was a good idea.
-Angela

It's more that I'm scared by all the stuff I've read about the dangers of vaccines, not that I think vaxing is a good idea. I understand there are some usually harmless diseases, and the concept of natural immunity being better than vax immunity too. But there just doesn't seem to be enough time to sift through all the information. I don't feel confident about deciding not to vax either.

I am refusing to vax our baby, because babies immune systems and bodies are so small, and plus he has allergic potential based on my second daughter, who had eczema and continues to have multiple food allergies.

[MommyMichele]

Originally Posted by Mamm2

If you have waited until he was three, why is your dh concerned about him catching up?

Why not look for a holistic vax friendly ped?

I'm confused by your first question. Dh thinks vax'ing is a good idea. He agreed to wait on Caroline's because of her eczema and allergies, but not forever.

I have long thought a holistic ped who could guide me in this decision would be wonderful, but haven't heard of one yet. I'm pretty fortunate with the one we have; she just asks, "Are you vax'ing today? and in many ways supports parents' actively participating in their children's care.

I would be interested in the details about that video, thanks!

[mrsfatty]

Just a couple of questions:

Why does your husband want to vaccinate? Are there vaccines he feels will be more beneficial than others (like are you planning on selectively vaccinating) or does he feel all of them are necessary?

The reasons I asked those questions, are because of my husband and my decision about vaccinating. We decided we were not going to vacccinate AT ALL--and then when our son turned 2 we would have "the great discussion"--deciding if we'd vaccinate at all...and if we vaccinate, which vaccines do we do...and why. We both agreed that we would make a decision we'd both be comfortable with (because to every decision there are consequences--good or bad--and we wanted to be able to "live with our decision" with peace)...originally we didn't vaccinate because of my food allergies, medication allergies, and personal history with severe vaccine reactions--we wanted to delay as long as possible so we could allow his immune system to continue to flurish and so we could learn everything we could about vaccines.

My son isn't two yet, but we've started talking about it a bit (mostly because I'm obsessed with learning anything and everything relating to vaccines--and it's eye opening). I'm leaning toward never vaccinating because of various reasons--but, still, that's not a decision set in stone yet.

You mentioned ezcema--and you should know that certain vaccines are not recommended for those who have ezcema. So, I would recommend avoiding those vaccines altogether. Please read this carefully--it's very conservative in what is "ok" for vaccination:
http://www.cdc.gov/nip/recs/contraindications.htm

There are several places that have different recommendations about a delayed schedule--but honestly, that's a decision you and your husband have to make on your own. Timing and which vaccines are up to you.

A resource that may be helpful to you (it's one of my journal entries on my LJ):
http://quaintpassion.livejournal.com/62525.html

It contains vaccine package inserts, delayed schedule articles, information about disease, questions to ask yourself or your healthcare provider. Know that certain diseases are not a risk to your now three year old (HiB and Pneumococcal and Rotavirus)--that they are really a "risk" to children under the age of three. I hope you find that information helpful.

Find out (by asking yourself and asking your husband) which vaccines you think are beneficial and why, which vaccines should be avoided (because of allergies and ezema or reactions within the family), which vaccines you would never give (because the getting the disease would be far more beneficial than the risk of the vaccine--like varicella or MMR or whatever you decide).

Did that answer your question? I hope you have found this helpful.

[illinoismommy]

Whatever you do, don't let them give tons and tons of vaxes on that day. They so will too... if you're going to delay vax at least spread them out, you know? Imagine how bad it would be to have her get ALL of them all at once, they don't even do that to babies (though they do a lot at one time...)

[Dar]

I've deleted some posts that are not in line with the forum guidelines. Please remember:

This forum is not a place to argue against selective or delayed vaccination or debate vaccination in general. Such discussions are already hosted in the main Vaccinations forum and posts in that vein are most welcome and appropriate there. Our purpose for this forum is to provide information that is helpful for parents who have made the decision to vaccinate and are not seeking discussion against their decision but rather support and information to help them proceed in the best manner.

The OP knows where she can go to find more information about vaccinating in general. Please address her specific questions about selective and delayed vaccinations here, as stated in her opening post.

Thanks,

Dar, moderator

[Mommy To Baby Roni]

I forgot to mention vaccination package inserts. Please be sure you and your dh read these BEFORE going to the next appt. or before vaxing and discuss them. If you or he don't fully understand what is in them, google a few words or come here and ask for an explanation. There are people around here who know exactly how these vaccines are made, about the ingredients and how they work in the body.

Now that I think about it, this is a great way to delay and get more research done. Start with the package insert for the vaccine dh is most concerned with and you think he may not leave the dr's office without. Then, call the ped's office and ask them exactly what the brand name of that vaccine that they administer and who manufactures it. If you need help finding that on the internet, please let us know. You can usually find it by googling the manufacturers name.

[mamakay]

The issue of vaccination becomes less overwhelming when you take it shot by shot, disease by disease.
I'd ask your husband which vaccines he feels the most strongly about, and why. Then research those, to see if your logic is sound. The more you know, the more comfortable you'll feel one way or another with whatever choice you make.

I'd bump the date to start vaxing back a few months, so you can give yourselves time to read, discuss, and come to an agreement you'll both feel good about.

[Mommy To Baby Roni]

Here is a page dedicated to allergies and vaccines. Please forward this on to your dh. It gives you the medical journals these summaries are from, if you want to look further into the studies referenced. Two things it notes - first, the pertussis vaccine is linked to allergies. At this point in her life, you may find, after researching the illness, that your dd is not at high risk of getting a bad case of pertussis and that the vaccine has a high failure rate (look at the high # of pertussis cases in the U.S., despite high child vaccination and that it's rarely diagnosed). Second, aluminum in vaccines can cause allergic reactions. Aluminum MUST be in ALL vaccines because it is the ingredient that creates the hyper-immune response to the little amount of virus or bacteria being injected. The problem with this is that the aluminum creates a hyper-immune response to other things the body is in contact with at that time - food, dust, grass, chemicals, etc. You may find the info at that link on aluminum helpful in your decisions to space, only select certain vaccines or cause you and your dh not to vax at all. Regardless of your decision, I thought it's important information you may find helpful.

http://www.vran.org/vaccines/anaphyl...accine-ana.htm

If the two of you still decide to vax, please first take a look at each individual disease and whether or not you really feel your child is at risk of suffering greatly or dying from the illness. Please remember - once you put that vaccine in, you can't take it out.

Why does your dh want to vax? I ask this question because it would really help us to know what, of all the information out there, is most important to him, so we may help you to provide him with complete information regarding those concerns. And, when he says he wants them "fully vaxed", what does that means to him? Does that mean going with the "recommended" vaccines or with the "school required" vaccines? Or does he not know and is going to go with whatever the doc recommends, since you are homeschooling?

Considering your foremost concerns are allergies, I'd really focus on aluminum and what it has the ability to do once injected into the body. I guess, regardless of your dd's allergies, I'd be most concerned with aluminum.

Lastly, I beg you not to allow her all the vaxes they will load her up with at one visit. If you are going to do this, please sit down with your dh (and even the dr.) and make a plan. Please, go to the next appt. so that you can voice your concerns to the dr. and, hopefully, she can come up with a "catch-up" schedule that is no more than one injection at a time (and not 5 vaccines in one shot). Even though dh wants to vax that day, see if you can get him to go home and discuss the dr's suggested schedule w/out vaxing at all that day. At least it will delay things a little longer, if that's what you want.

I assumed the previous poster mentioning a video was referring to Dr. Sherry Tenenny's presentation, since that's the only video about vaccination I know of. I saw you requested where to buy it and I found this link. It's about 1/2 way down the page.
http://www.vaclib.org/basic/products.htm