i'd like to not gain the 44lbs i gained last time but i tend to believe each woman has a pregnancy 'set point'. i'm starting out heavier this time i think by 5 lbs but expect i'll probably end up at the same weight. my bigger intention is to be in better shape. i went to aerobics tuesday but it SUCKED because my boobs hurt and it was way too much bouncing. i'm hoping to keep that up until 6 months or so. maybe not even that long
another resolution is to enjoy every last minute of my 'only' and give him all the undivided attention that i can. i am grieving the loss of his onliness (only a little bit at this point but i know this will change his life completely). ya know? even though it is a change that i wanted and that i think will be great for him i think he is going to be mad when mama is so consumed by this new creature. i'm scared about that.
i am soooooooo tired today. i was out in the sun for a couple of hours and it completely zapped me.
i'm not so dismayed by my hub's desire to go hospital because i'm a mega wimp and i hate pain. the thing i mainly hate about the hospital is the iv. needles gross me out. i also think the monitors bug but it has to be possible to not be hooked up to them constantly because i know they have tubs for laboring. i never made it to the tub last time. i don't mind the rooms or nurses or the vicodin
(kidding about the vicodin
) i have a big doubt that i could make it through birth (want to) without some kind of pain med
my goal is to avoid the epidural. i truely do believe that they 'call' c-sections far more often than necessary and that IS a risk of going the hospital route. i would really hate to have one unless it was really needed. that was my biggest fear the first time. i have the belief though that since this will be my 2nd birth my body will know more what to do and that it could possibly be pretty non-eventful. we'll see. i'm still undecided about midwife vs. the ob i used before. part of me wants to go back to my ob so i can compare my weight this time last pregnancy
stupid, i know. and i liked him. but then i've never had a 'midwife' experience so i'm curious about that too.
i have huge admiration for women who homebirth (and i feel like a wierdo for not choosing it for myself because i know so many women who do). i'm glad everyone is free to do what they want.
happy 29th zion! i turned the big 3-0 when i was preg last time so no big drinks for me.