or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Understanding Circumcision › A question about sex with a circumcised man
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

A question about sex with a circumcised man - Page 5

post #81 of 122
About strong body odour. There are some metabolism related diseases that can course very strong body or/and genital odour. If it is mild, you can live with it never knowing there is actually something wrong.
post #82 of 122
Quote:
Every encounter leaves me swollen and sore for 2 days.
Me too. Not enough to not want to do it again (I have higher drive than DH, TMI). I've only been with dh who is circ. I keep blaming the condoms for the pain (allergy) but I got a non allergy one today (polyerethane?) and it still hurt really bad after (and redness/swelling.)

In a tight circ would you be able to pull the skin down AT ALL? I sometimes wonder if DH had a tight circ (curve is from tight circ, right?) but I can pull the skin a bit. TMI I know but I've always wondered and who else would know the answer to such an odd question?

My dad is circ and my mom says she doesnt have pain (yes, we talk about this stuff, we are a goofy bunch.) She thought it was our condom useage (my dad has a vasectomy).

I always have had a bit of pain though (got married at 18 so been doing "it" for almost 8 years), more after having kids so I always thought it was me and my lack of "lubeness."
post #83 of 122
Well I personally hate condoms, even though I will conceed that they have their purposes. I've used condoms with both circed and intact men, and I don't know they are just yuck to me. It just isn't the same as without. And it definately messes up the mechanics of intact sex. Or maybe that is my personal bias against condoms showing?
post #84 of 122
I have no complaints about dh's foreskin and I STILL don't understand how on earth a circumcised penis works having never had anything to do with one

love and peace.
post #85 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by EricaLeigh View Post
I'm not talking about a sweat smell, I'm talking about a VERY strong rotting fish smell. Sorry to be so blunt but it was just terriable! I'm glad that this is an isolated case! Thanks ladies for chiming in!
He probably didn't pull back the foreskin to clean properly after sex. What you're describing sounds to me much like a garbage can "full" of condoms & tissue after a great weekend... I learned this completely by accident
post #86 of 122
PS: This is the thread that made me feel guilty for my boy. I wish I could rewind time for him!

In the meantime, I wonder why this kind of information isn't provided by doctors to patients considering it. There's always an abundance of pro-circ reading material! WTF?
post #87 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by desertpenguin View Post
i read about a study almosty a year ago that said something to the extent of only about 25% of women are able to attain orgasm during intercourse (or maybe it was able to attain orgasm during intercourse most of the time.) my sil is one of those women who can orgasm just about every single time, and she has been with intact and cut men. she doesn't have a preference, though (and cut her two boys ) i wonder if there is a correlation between the women who can regularly attain orgasm through vaginal stimulation only during intercourse, and women who have no preference between intact and circed sex.

I am one of those women, I generally O pretty much every time. I am just "built that way" I believe. Even when I was a single young woman alone I always concentrated on internal stimulation as it felt the most intense to me. One thing I can say here is that since working on restoration and having some "gliding" the negative sensations during sex in certain positions are completely eliminated. Therefore, in those positions because of restoration I am very easily multi-orgasmic. Go figure: .

For me, since I have always been orgasmic, the issue has really been the presence of negative feelings and sensations during intercourse. For a long time it was a combo of pain/pleasure and I had thought that was a normal experience of sex. But, instinctively some things did seem off to me. Now, with the gliding (which is especially obvious in certain positions when I am in control) the negative sensations don't exist anymore at all so it's pure pleasure (leading to multiple O for me).

So, I can *understand* why some women will defend circumcised sex. I could orgasm during it as well, the thing is, there is still such a huge difference with a foreskin there. Even a tight circ v a loose one (which would be the equivalent of what I have experienced). The looser the better, and no doubt that it really reduces to eliminates negative sensations and makes for more frequent/better orgasms. It's the difference between being poked and massaged. Poke or massage very sensitive places and you'll get a reaction...however with the poking there will be some negative sensations as well as pleasurable ones. With the massaging it's only pleasure.

Hope that makes sense!
post #88 of 122
Thread Starter 
I just keep reading this thread and thinking...

What right do people have to chnage the sex lives of their children...and at birth to boot!!! Don't they have the right to experience sex as nature intended it before bits of penis get cut off?????? : :
post #89 of 122
Intact males can be more tender, gentle, relaxed, and loving during sex because the lightest and subtlest gesture or motion evokes deeply satisfying sensations. — Paul M. Fleiss and Frederick M. Hodges

Saw this quote in an article, thought I would throw it up here since we're talking about it.
post #90 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by sandals View Post
I just keep reading this thread and thinking...

What right do people have to chnage the sex lives of their children...and at birth to boot!!! Don't they have the right to experience sex as nature intended it before bits of penis get cut off?????? : :
I think that is the whole point on why culturally when genital mutilation occurs they do it on babies and young pre-pubescent children. Because if the did it later on, nobody would consent to it : .

Even a pro-circ woman I knew used that logic actually....her DH was pushing for circ and when I said, 'it can always be done later if it has to be (though that is very rare), why don't you just wait.' Her response was 'if we wait then he won't want to have it done.'

Well, uh, DUH! My DH tells me if he had a choice he wouldn't have had it done to himself. As he puts it "he's not the type to get unnecessary surgery."

But, he didn't have a choice.

Or in another way of thinking about it. A guy I once met talked about his circumcision like this (as an infant)..."I screamed and cried the whole time [for them to stop], but nobody listened." That guy was semi-joking about it, but that is the point though isn't it.
post #91 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by phatchristy View Post
So, I can *understand* why some women will defend circumcised sex.
Just wanted to clarify my point... I'm not trying to "defend" circ'd sex, just saying that not everyone experiences the jackhammered, sore for 2 days, need extra lube feeling. It was just kind of offensive to me for there to be a blanket statement about it when individual experiences are different. And even though I don't have 30 years of comparison, I can also add my 2 cents. Doesn't make my experience more or less valuable. My DH is very sensitive and maybe he has a little extra skin or some remaining foreskin... I haven't gone there in a while... but I think it really depends on the guy too, not just whether they are cut or intact.
post #92 of 122
I had no desire to offend, I'm just blunt about this subject. You certainly have a right to share your opinion, & it's valuable to know. Some circ'd men I've known certainly worked it better than others!

But you can't discount the value of a wide span of time & experiences, either; it is just common sense that someone who's been eating at a wide variety of restaurants over decades has a wider knowledge base of food than someone who's been exclusively eating mama's home cooking for a few years. Even if mama is a REALLY good cook. Kwim?
post #93 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by DesireeH View Post
In a tight circ would you be able to pull the skin down AT ALL? I sometimes wonder if DH had a tight circ (curve is from tight circ, right?) but I can pull the skin a bit. TMI I know but I've always wondered and who else would know the answer to such an odd question?
i think my dh has a tight circ. when he is erect, you can see the circ scar about half way down his penis, and you can tell that a substantial amount of skin was removed both length and width-wise. when he's flaccid, you can't really tell where the scar is, and the skin can easily be pulled down over the glans. i think the difference between a 'high and tight' circ vs. a 'low and loose' circ are probably most obvious during an erection. but perhaps somebody else would know differently, because i've only been with dh.
post #94 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by phatchristy View Post
Intact males can be more tender, gentle, relaxed, and loving during sex because the lightest and subtlest gesture or motion evokes deeply satisfying sensations. — Paul M. Fleiss and Frederick M. Hodges

Saw this quote in an article, thought I would throw it up here since we're talking about it.
Yup. I would agree with this!
post #95 of 122
about my sil possibly lying about her experiences, i don't know. she conceeded that the intact man (or men) she has been with were really good lovers but the other aspects of her relationship with this man (or men) have clouded a lot of that, i'm sure. i don't think it's something she had ever considered before i discussed it with her. but when i told her i had never orgasmed during intercourse she was really shocked and acted like i was defective.


honestly it has gotten to the point that most of the time when dh and i have sex, i'm just waiting for him to get it over with because it hurts so bad. we've discussed restoration..well, i've discussed restoration. he just says it's weird (nvm the fact that this man has several body piercings and tattoos ) and won't say anything other than that. about half of the time he tells me he's sorry that it hurts me, but he must not be that sorry because he isn't willing to change anything! at the same time i feel like a bit of a hag for it being such an issue, but what am i supposed to do? i don't really want to spend the rest of our sex lives always just waiting for him to get it over with and leave me alone so i can do my own thing.
post #96 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by TigerTail View Post
I had no desire to offend, I'm just blunt about this subject. You certainly have a right to share your opinion, & it's valuable to know. Some circ'd men I've known certainly worked it better than others!

But you can't discount the value of a wide span of time & experiences, either; it is just common sense that someone who's been eating at a wide variety of restaurants over decades has a wider knowledge base of food than someone who's been exclusively eating mama's home cooking for a few years. Even if mama is a REALLY good cook. Kwim?

Yep, it's important to realize too that there are no "cookie cutter circs"...which parts of the penis are spared and how much much skin is taken is at the discretion of the doctor who is doing the cutting. There will be differences in the tightness of the circumcision, how much shaft/innerforeskin is taken and how much frenulum if any is left. All those factors can affect the sensitivity of a circumcised man and how he "feels" during intercourse.

To the other poster who you were responding to, I never had the "sore for days" experience that you inferred, but with a DH that lasts forever dryness would happen over time, the roughness and style of thrusting were what I always felt was off about him. It never instintively made sense to me that he would need that much stimulation. LOL...sex shouldn't be that much work of the species wouldn't have survived.
post #97 of 122
I have NEVER had an organsm from intercourse. :

I am almost ALWAYS sore and swollen after sex.

Sometimes I avoid it because I don't want to be in pain....AND I have thought this was all MY fault until recently.

I am so : that my MIL was talked into having my DH circumcised at the age of 4.



I am very hopeful that the restoration process is successful and that it WILL improve all of these things, because I will be very disappointed if it doesn't. He just taped for the first time yesterday.
post #98 of 122
Quote:
Originally Posted by desertpenguin View Post
but when i told her i had never orgasmed during intercourse she was really shocked and acted like i was defective.
Oh honey, it's ALWAYS the women who get in the orgasm pissing contests that are full of it! You're *fine*.
post #99 of 122
Quote:
I have NEVER had an organsm from intercourse.

I am almost ALWAYS sore and swollen after sex.

Sometimes I avoid it because I don't want to be in pain....AND I have thought this was all MY fault until recently.
Me, too. Dh has a very high and tight circ. I get so mad that this cycle of mutilation started in dh's family. His grandfather moved to the States from Holland when he was a boy. Obviously was intact but maybe they circ'ed as an adult? Anway, dh's dad was circ'ed so of course they circ'ed dh. It makes me so angry that this even started because the grandfather was intact. And MIL is so painfully ignorant that her number one sex advice for girls about to get married is make sure you get some lube. In fact, that is the main advice FIL gave dh as well. :
post #100 of 122
Quote:
I'm not talking about a sweat smell, I'm talking about a VERY strong rotting fish smell. Sorry to be so blunt but it was just terriable! I'm glad that this is an isolated case! Thanks ladies for chiming in!
Didn't read the entire thread, but a strong 'fishy' odor is associated with trichomoniasis in women. I'm assuming this could be the case in an intact male as well.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Understanding Circumcision
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Understanding Circumcision › A question about sex with a circumcised man