I need advice, reassurance...

[L J]

I'm sure this has been posted in other ways before, but I really need a place to talk about this, and I would love some advice.

I am pregnant with my first child, due in January. Originally, I had planned to BF exclusively and not even try to pump until he was 6 or 7 months old. I was going to be a SAHM completely for the time being. I was planning to go back to school when he is 8 months, so I wanted a good supply built up for the hours that I am in class and my mom is keeping him.

Without going into too much detail, there is a very good chance I will very soon be a single mother. Which means, that I can probably barely afford to take two weeks off after his birth, much less a few weeks/months.

I am so scared that if I have to start pumping from two weeks on, he is going to eventually reject the breast. I wasn't worried about giving an 8 month old EBM from a sippy cup, but I know that won't work with an infant.

I am terrified that I am not going to be able to pump enough to feed him only BM- and it would break my heart to have to supplement with formula for that reason.

What can I do to prevent him from rejecting my breast? What can I read, how can I prepare myself to pump so often? What kind of pump(s) are best? (or links to threads about that topic?) What kind of bottle/device should I use?

I want to BF my child until he is 2 or 3 or 4 or whenever... I just can't accept anything else as an option. Please, somebody, tell me this is going to be okay?

[wirewendy]

Oh gosh, I am so sorry mama.

Lots of women I know successfully do both bottles and nursing, so don't worry, you will be able to hold in your arms and nurse your little one to sleep at night. I think the big concern is that if you start them out with a bottle, they won't be able to figure out how to nurse. But since you are going to start out nursing, you should be o.k..

It is going to be tough to try to pump enough, but if you have to give formula, don't be heart broken. Keep in mind that we all just do the best we can with the resources we have available, and life likes to send us the unexpected. Focus on the beauty of this little life that you will have, and don't mourn for lost ideals. The important thing is that your baby gets the nutrients that it needs.

I am sorry mama. Hugs and more hugs to you.

[hipcoolmama]

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Don't worry about him rejecting the breast or drinking from a bottle if you have to pump early. Many women start with pumped breastmilk and nursing from the start and they are fine. Work with a lactation consultant if you can. While it's best to establish a good latch on your nipple for the first month or so, that's not the only way to find success. I know one woman - an accountant - who had a baby during tax season. She went back to work on Monday after giving birth on Friday and she still breastfed.

Good luck!

[jessekc]

I'm so sorry, it's sounds like you are dealing with a rough road ahead.

I started pumping when my milk came in when she was three days old, she had her first bottle at 2 weeks and has done just fine going back and forth so far. You both will do the best you can and all will work out for the best.

[anarchamama]

I don't know if this is an option or not but when I went back to work when ds1 was 6 mo I would have dh bring him into my work to nurse at least once, sometimes 2x on a shift and would just have extra milk at home if they needed it. If your mom is going to be watchingm the babe maybe she coudl bring him to you? At least once on shift. Good luck and trust your body, once you get a good supply going it'll hold up to a lot, just get ready for a lot of night nursing......Be prepared to devote a lot of time to being in bed at night.

[L J]

Thank you all, so much. Your kind words and reassurance mean more than you can know. I really do feel better after reading everyone's replies.

[Ammaarah]

I would advise you to wait until the latest possible time to intro a bottle (like the night before you go back to work) and use slow-flow nipples. Pumping is a PITA but you can train yourself to do it. Remember every bit of mother's milk is nothing to sneeze at. Hopefully you'll be able to keep it up without supplementing but don't worry yourself too much about it yet.

Being in touch with a LLL group might help alleviate some of your concerns too.

[timneh_mom]

I just wanted to say you've gotten excellent suggestions, and didn't want to read your post without responding... it would be so hard to go through what you're facing, while pregnant... many moms do have to go back to work early on and they definitely still nurse. Your babe will have lots of hours during the rest of the day/night to nurse. I second Ammaarah's suggestion of getting in touch with LLL. You'll find tons of great support from the other moms there, and leaders are so excellent for helping with problems!

Take care