Compacting Mommas? - Page 15

[bendmom]

Our son's school has a Harvest festival this Sat. for Holloween. There will be three people walking around judging the adult costumes for prizes. I have this big sequined puffy gown. It's a floor length blue satin and taffeta ball gown. I am making a white sash and have a pair of fancy black heels. I really needed a tiara to finish the outfit, but of course I don't own one. I went to a couple of resale shops but had no luck. I was going to go to the next town over since they have a used costume shop, and decided to call dh at work to let him know my plan, and he said to ask this girl in his office who always has weird things like that. So she didn't have one, but as she's looking up the # for the shop so I didn't just drive all the way out there, she turns around to another woman in the office and asks if she has access to a tiara. This woman says, " I have two. I was homecoming queen twice in high school and never got rid of them". Awesome!

[anthasam]

Just popping in now to say that I'm subbing and have finally finished reading

I think we're going to do a mini-compact for November, to see how it goes. I am drafting our "rules" and need to review them with DH this weekend when he gets home. I think I may need him for moral support

[celestialdreamer]

Originally Posted by 2GR8KIDS

I've listed a few new things on eBay over the years- usually things we receive as gifts but can't use. I think if it is "new" from an individual, it is OK under the Compact- after all, if you buy a "new" Waterford glass from me because I can't use it, it won't kick the whole supply/demand process into gear to cause Waterford to make another glass. Sadly, I agree that now most of the new items on eBay are listed by stores.

Good point. I suppose it would depend on how badly you needed the specific item. For me part of the challenge is to learn to do without the "things" I think I "need" and reevaluate as to what is a need vs a want. I like the idea of having to think outside the box to find other items that will work for a purchase instead of buying new or even buy new from a private seller on ebay. If I were trading someone I know for something new, that would be different in my mind. Like I said before, you choose your specific "rules"!

[celestialdreamer]

bendmom- Isn't it cool how when you put out there that you need a specific item, it seems to magically appear? I've found the reverse is true too, when I realize I need to get rid of something I seem to find someone who needs it.

anthasam- welcome! Good luck in November!


Any ideas on where I can get a good condition used king sized duvet cover? My current one has been recently chewed up by my dog I'd like to find one that goes with my current bedroom colors so that nothing else will need to be replaced if you KWIM. The bedroom is light yellow and white walls with light green sheets and this duvet cover

[bendmom]

Anthasam, welcomw! I am doing the same, only doing the compact till the day after Thanksgiving, then I will evaluate the rest of the year. I am starting to understand what the pp said about the compact being not just about finding things used, but evaluating the actual need for something.

[momaste]

Saturday will be two weeks for me. I've bought groceries but nothing else for nearly two weeks. (That's not true. Today I bought windshield wiper blades, but that's one of those safety loopholes, since I'm unlikely to find used ones in good enough condition.)

It's not that hard! Turns out, I really do have what I need. I don't have any cloth napkins, so I bought a cute, kitschy set on Ebay. They're functional and pretty, double bonus!

We gave DS1 a haircut this evening with DH's clipper/shaver set. Boy did that baby yell! I wondered if paying someone to do it would result in a better cut or calmer baby, but it was over quickly enough and is more even than the last attempt, haha. Any tricks for calming him down when the shaver is going? I had to hold his head still and he was hating it.

[litlwons]

Things are going good here. I haven't felt the need to go shopping. Did buy some 'edible" plants at the Farmer's Market, going to plant them tomorrow.

I am about to do a big purge again in my home. This last Saturday I was sitting on the couch with my sick babe plastered to my chest and I heard my cell phone beeping to tell me the batteries were going dead. Then after awhile it did its final song that says "I am all out of Juice". I thought it was just on the mirror where we keep the keys and such but it isn't there. I HAVE LOOKED EVERYWHERE!!!! It is driving me so batty. I have almost turned this place upsidedown... and am realizing we still have waaaaaaaay more than we need (I have gotten rid of soooo much!) So this weekend while DH and DS1 are gone camping I am going to purge some more.

Now if I could just figure out where that phone is.....: : :
It is so sad for me to think about how much time I waiste dealing with the stuff in our home. Precious time that could be spent doing so much more important things.... oh the list is endless. It makes me not want to buy another thing again.

Kathleen

[Natalya]

Originally Posted by litlwons

It is so sad for me to think about how much time I waiste dealing with the stuff in our home. Precious time that could be spent doing so much more important things.... oh the list is endless. It makes me not want to buy another thing again.

:

[momaste]

How does receiving new things go in the Compact world? My mom called today to tell me there is a good sale at Kohl's on long sleeve T-shirts, and what is my size, she'll pick some up for me. I said as nice as I could that I didn't need any long sleeve T-shirts (and in fact, just decluttered my clothes and got rid of several!) but I think it upset her. Then she was mentioning that she wanted to get DH an IPOD for Christmas. He doesn't want an IPOD because he has an MP3 player already and hardly uses it. So I shot her down twice in a row. She's a good gift giver in general, usually picking out nice things for us and getting a good deal on them - the deal is part of the gift. "You'll never guess what I spent on that!" I come by frugality naturally, haha.

It's nice of her to want to give me things, but I don't need more things and don't want her to spend money on things I'll just get rid of. I'm anxious about Christmas, since she often buys from my list and then gets little extra stuff, because quantity counts. I asked her to get us a family gift this year (as no gifts wouldn't fly at, and she wasn't going for the experience gift idea!)

What do I do about getting gifts?

Anxious...

[anthasam]

Thanks...

... for welcoming me.

Some preliminary thoughts:

We've already started to shift our way of thinking to finding alternatives to buying new -- to save money and the environment!

My weak point is eating out. Not necessarily fast food, but food not cooked by us! I will set a limit to once a week and the establishments should be locally owned and not chain restaurants.

A few exceptions for the month:
1) We have already committed to a new roof (and we NEED a new roof) in November. I think this falls under the "safety" umbrella.

2) Printing of photographs

3) The purchase of a few, already-selected gifts for the holidays. The gifts are a combination of hand-made and store bought, and I do need the store bought part to make it all "work".

4) I will likely re-up my knitting lessons this month. But, this is in support of a local shopkeeper and I am learning a skill for the future. Knit items for everyone next year

I'm starting to write this up formally and will probably post it in a few days

:

[kellid]

Originally Posted by momaste

How does receiving new things go in the Compact world? My mom called today to tell me there is a good sale at Kohl's on long sleeve T-shirts, and what is my size, she'll pick some up for me. I said as nice as I could that I didn't need any long sleeve T-shirts (and in fact, just decluttered my clothes and got rid of several!) but I think it upset her. Then she was mentioning that she wanted to get DH an IPOD for Christmas. He doesn't want an IPOD because he has an MP3 player already and hardly uses it. So I shot her down twice in a row. She's a good gift giver in general, usually picking out nice things for us and getting a good deal on them - the deal is part of the gift. "You'll never guess what I spent on that!" I come by frugality naturally, haha.

It's nice of her to want to give me things, but I don't need more things and don't want her to spend money on things I'll just get rid of. I'm anxious about Christmas, since she often buys from my list and then gets little extra stuff, because quantity counts. I asked her to get us a family gift this year (as no gifts wouldn't fly at, and she wasn't going for the experience gift idea!)

What do I do about getting gifts?

Anxious...

Ahhh, she's so sweet we have the same mommy. I emailed my mom the terms of the compact and what we are doing. She kinda understands it, but she doesn't get it. She sent us a box of shoes that she bought from the thrift store for $2 each (5 pair) that we didn't need, and she sewed a fleece hat for ds and dh which we always need. Her hearts in the right spot, but Christmas will be the same way for us. The people I have told think I'm depriving my kids of Christmas. They don't realize dad and other family members will "sabotage" my plan. I DO want an ipod for christmas and told my dad last night about it. He is a HUGE junker and he will find it used at a great price, it's what he does. He works for money so he can junk. He loves it.

I think you can only tell people what your doing and hope they understand, maybe even going as far to beg that they buy used and if they insist on getting something you don't need saying, "well, maybe I can hold on to it and trade it down the road for something I do need." I feel that's what I might have to do with my mom.

My dh is giving me a fit. He always has to play devil's advocate and it drives me crazy. He's not doing the compact and I just have to come to grips with that and realize it's my problem if I have a problem with it. He asked me if I realized that if this movement took a better hold that he would be out of a job. And I said I hadn't thought about it that way, and kinda shrugged it off. And he was like, I can't believe you so non-shallant about where our livelihood comes from. And I told him that it was a good thing if this movement took a better hold and that if he lost his job it would be OK, that he is a very intelligent person and that he would find another job that wasn't affected by shrinking footprints. He was pretty frustrated. Me too.

[Ravin]

Originally Posted by bendmom

It is machine washable, that wasn't really the issue. It is so big and really heavy, I had no way to wash it in my machine. I posted a pic in my blog, but could only get a third of it in!

Take it to a laundromat and use a triple-loader machine.

Oh, and the 100-mile diet: I live in the Phoenix Metro Valley. It might theoretically be possible do to such a diet, but if more than a few people did, we'd all starve, unless a very major urban/suburban gardening movement went along with it.

[kellid]

New house declutter.

We just moved into a new house a couple of months ago and I need to do a clean sweep and get rid of s#(t. I have two kids 4mo and 2.5yo. Having that been said, is there a system that has worked for you all that is efficient. Room my room? How to sort? Where to take stuff? I know I can sort keep, give, trash, I'm looking for an system that is tried and true that someone wants to share for pure efficiency. Oh and ideas on how to deal with dh's stuff if he's not on board. I hate it. I am the "keeper" of the house and he has so much........stuff and it is everywhere. I feel I getting rid of my stuff to "free" myself, but then I feel I will still be held down by his stuff. I feel like keeping a box and just throwing it all in there when it's laying around and making him find a home for everything and keep it there. Problem is, it will have to be a really pretty box, one that stays there all the time, because I can't MAKE him do anything. I've been trying for about 10 years now.

Ranting and requesting ideas.

[Ravin]

First of all, you might want to re-evaluate (especially for yourself, if not the kids), if a haircut is really a NEED, and not just a want. I've gone years without cutting my hair. When I did get a haircut last summer, it was long enough that I was able to go to a salon that did free haircuts for donations to Locks of Love.

If it's really a NEED (and I can understand that some would feel this way especially the boys), how about something simple like a buzz cut that you COULD do at home? If you do opt for haircuts, go to a locally-owned place and wash your own hair beforehand so all they have to do is JUST the cut.

Originally Posted by kathirynne

I know that there are no "Compact Police", but I am really trying to stay true to my Compact pledge, so your input on this issue would be appreciated.

My boys and I need haircuts. I can't do it myself. (I do my daughter's hair myself, but it's only her fringe and the ends that ever needs trimmed, so it's not a hard job, and it's easy to camoflauge the mistakes.) I don't know anyone who can do it for me, other than going to a professional.

Would it violate my Compact pledge to get our hair cut at a salon? (Assuming I went to a local salon.) Do haircuts squeeze in under the Health & Hygeine exemption?

[Ravin]

Originally Posted by momaste

We gave DS1 a haircut this evening with DH's clipper/shaver set. Boy did that baby yell! I wondered if paying someone to do it would result in a better cut or calmer baby, but it was over quickly enough and is more even than the last attempt, haha. Any tricks for calming him down when the shaver is going? I had to hold his head still and he was hating it.

My vote would be for not cutting his hair. I think little boys are cute in long hair, and if he doesn't like it, why do it?

[melissel]

Originally Posted by litlwons

It is so sad for me to think about how much time I waiste dealing with the stuff in our home. Precious time that could be spent doing so much more important things.... oh the list is endless. It makes me not want to buy another thing again.

Oh yeah. I think it's actually contributing a little to how depressed I've been feeling lately! Shocking to think that "the good life" is actually driving me a little insane :

Oh, hi by the way I've been : for awhile now, slowly working up the guts to go whole hog. You mamas are amazing!

[Ravin]

So I have a dilemma: I plan on getting a lifetime membership to the alumni association for the university I'm about to graduate from. It's $300 for new grads. They throw in an iPod as a gift for joining.

The question is, what the heck do I do with the iPod? Would keeping it go against the Compact? If I have one, DD will want to use it and IMO her little ears are too young for headphones. Would re-gifting it be a reasonable thing to do? My niece might like it and I'm at a loss as to what to get her (I'll talk to my sis about it first and not give it if she doesn't want it). The only problem with that is that it would be a more valuable gift that what I'm giving my other niece and my foster sister who's the same age as my niece (both of whom already have iPods or similar devices, I think).

[melissel]

Originally Posted by kellid

We just moved into a new house a couple of months ago and I need to do a clean sweep and get rid of s#(t. I have two kids 4mo and 2.5yo. Having that been said, is there a system that has worked for you all that is efficient. Room my room? How to sort? Where to take stuff? I know I can sort keep, give, trash, I'm looking for an system that is tried and true that someone wants to share for pure efficiency. Oh and ideas on how to deal with dh's stuff if he's not on board. I hate it. I am the "keeper" of the house and he has so much........stuff and it is everywhere. I feel I getting rid of my stuff to "free" myself, but then I feel I will still be held down by his stuff. I feel like keeping a box and just throwing it all in there when it's laying around and making him find a home for everything and keep it there. Problem is, it will have to be a really pretty box, one that stays there all the time, because I can't MAKE him do anything. I've been trying for about 10 years now.

Ranting and requesting ideas.

I hear ya. Do you have a Freecycle group near you? I find that's the quickest way to get rid of stuff. People take the strangest things if they're free And you can box things up and say "must take the whole box" and they will, and they'll re-Freecycle what they don't want. Goodwill and Salvation Army are good drop-off places too, and the Vietnam vets association will pick up around here.

[kellid]

Originally Posted by momaste

Any tricks for calming him down when the shaver is going? I had to hold his head still and he was hating it.

Oh, you brave girl. I give my dh his cuts, but I would never give ds. They are soooooooo squirmy and unhappy. Not that it would be much better with someone else, but we pay $5 for my friend who is my hairdresser to do it. She is used to it and does such a good job. She's got the cute little toy thing they sit on with the cool cape. It's sooooooooo worth it for me.

[kellid]

melissel = thanks. I will check into the freecycle. your right about the free stuff. i've fallen in that trap, and I got it from my dad. "oh, ...well it's free.......why not."