baby "down time"?

[magpiedee]

How much "down time" do you give your baby-- that is, when they are awake and you are not nursing, wearing, playing with, or holding them? I generally nurse Cleo to sleep, then put her down in the bassinet that's 2 feet from our nursing station. She sleeps for a random amount of time and then wakes up. So what i'm wondering is, how much time should she spend alone?

She makes noises, watches things, moves, kicks, etc., and i'm never sure how much time she needs without me and how much of this time I should spend interacting with her, you know? Naturally, when she makes the noises that indicate she wants attention or needs nursing or cuddling or diaper changes, I go directly to her; but when she's entertaining herself... ?

Yeah, it's rambly, but you know what I mean. :

[mamamilkers]

Well, I have a toddler, so DD#2 spends "alot" of time alone in her bouncy seat just hanging out. Basically as much as she can stand. If she starts crying, I try to pick her up right away (sometimes I can't immediately, but always within a minute or two).

IMO it's just fine to let them hang out and explore the world around them without being in arms. Or maybe I'm just telling myself that because I can't hold her 24/7?

[2 in August]

If she is happy, it seems to me that ti's ok for her to play alone for a little bit. I wish my ds would be that content.

[SummerTwilight]

I WISH this were even possible with Aria. She is in my or my hubby's arms (including sleep) ALL the time unless diaper change or in the car...6 weeks- I am EXHAUSTED but she cries as soon as she is put down!:

[cottontail]

Not much!

But a little more when DH is away. We have some play time in the morning b/c she wakes up kicking and moving her arms like crazy and seems amused and entertained for about 20-minutes. Then a little in the evening if DH and I cook supper together--we put her in a bouncy seat in the kitchen doorway to watch while we get our stove cooking done. Other than that, unless for a very seldom nap together, she pretty much won't have it any other way. I want a new sling so bad!!

[coop_mom]

Originally Posted by SummerTwilight

I WISH this were even possible with Aria. She is in my or my hubby's arms (including sleep) ALL the time unless diaper change or in the car...6 weeks- I am EXHAUSTED but she cries as soon as she is put down!:

I'm with you Summer, babe is attached to me or DH almost all the time. It is exhausting, doing lots of nursing here!

--k

[veganf]

I try to make a point to pick Nate up when he's happy and just hanging out, instead of when he starts to fuss or cry. Because there are plenty of times when he has to stay in his seat or basket or on the bed and cry for a few minutes. But he's definitely been my least needy baby, and he does spend a lot of time just watching what's going on. And there are times when he WANTS to be put down; I'll be carrying him and he's crying, and when I set him down he's happy again. Go figure.

[phoebemommy]

I'm with veganf -- I don't like it when ds has to cry to get picked up. I put him down to hang out when I'm doing laundry and stuff, but I stay close by, and if he starts to fidget I know he wants up. He's generally one who wants to be with me unless he's asleep. My instinct says he doesn't want alone time yet, but I'm perfectly willing to give it to him when and if he changes.

By the way, have people been telling you to give him more alone time? My mom and MIL both seem to think it's important, but I'm not just gonna let him cry, you know?

[magpiedee]

No one has mentioned anything about it to me... but my DD is cheerful and playful when she wakes up from a nursing nap and seems to enjoy talking to her mobile and squawking and kicking things. I usually walk over and interact with her until she looks away or gets bored with me. We live in a one-bedroom apartment, so I am always close enough to respond to her noises before it gets to crying.

I just didn't want to feel like a bad mama-- whether because I keep her too attached and don't let her explore, or whether I ignore her when I should be enriching her mind. Danged if ya do, danged if ya don't, ya know?

[Meeshi Mama]

Now that Luna is awake more often, she gets plenty of down time and seems to love it. When I fold laundry, she lays on the bed beside me. I'll open the page to a brightly colored board book and prop it next to he and she'll go from cooing at me to looking at the book to wiggling and kicking.

She also loves time in the bouncy seat, she could look at the hanging plants or the ceiling fan for a long time. Her eyesight is really good now, so she just intently watches me as I do things in the kitchen. She can spot me anywhere and follow me with her eyes.

I don't think there's any one answer to how much down time they should have. If they are seeming content and happy when laying down awake or sitting in a seat I think it is fine for any amount of time, really.

[phoebemommy]

magpiedee -- It seems like the kind of thing that would be different with each kid, you know? Like if she's happy, go with it!

[taradt]

Originally Posted by phoebemommy

magpiedee -- It seems like the kind of thing that would be different with each kid, you know? Like if she's happy, go with it!

ypu got that right!!!!!

Kienan is a "can't be put down " kinda baby. He will tolerate a 5 minute naked butt time while I fold clothes beside him (usually twice a day) and on a really really good day I can squeeze in a 5 minute bouncy chair time while I throw dinner in a pot but that is it. So a grand total of 15 minutes

With my daughter she would happily play naked butt on the floor for 1/2 hour at a time at the same age.

tara

[Katiemare]

My motto is, if he isn't crying--let him be. It's different when you have another child to care for. My mom has commented that I put Haakon down a lot more that I did Bear. : what else can I do? my back and shoulders get so tired from slinging most of the day.

If baby is crying, that's not good 'down time'--if she or he is cooing, enjoying a colorful picture or a tree outside the window, I think that's beneficial for you both.