Insecure pregnant lady rant - Page 3

[Jenelle]

Originally Posted by Ahappymel

He is paying for this vacation out of his own pocket...it's just that he hasn't repayed the debt yet and...

Oh Mamas, I'm afraid to tell you the other part.

He has promised to pay the final two installments to the midwife (at the very beginning of our relationship, I told him that I would prefer that in lieu of an engagement ring)...one due on 11/16 and the other on 12/16, each for $1200.I've already paid the first $800.
I'm starting to feel really stupid

"Out of his own pocket" is something I cannot relate to. Are you not in a relationship together? (Married?) Living together? Do you split ALL expenses right down the middle, 50/50? Is he going to pay you 1/2 of the money you are saving by breastfeeding each month?

The fact that "he" is paying for it makes zero difference to me. It sounds as though he has borrowed money from a joint savings account, which has yet to be paid back, but he "has" the money to go rejuvenate with other possibly naked women? Come on.

Now you're saying you don't have a ring, because he is supposed to pay the midwife... and it's not looking too good for him to make those payments on time, is it? So, you're going to be left with no ring and still paying the midwife yourself. Great.

I'm sorry. It just makes me so mad that a pregnant mama is having to deal with such insensitive, irresponsible bullshit.

[MacKinnon]

How frustrating.... : I just had to stop in to your frustrated mama thread and tell you (a) thanks for your support and (b) you have much more of a right to be pissed than I do!! I would be hurt, upset, angry... You name it.... I was irritated with my DH just for going out to watch the Tigers game! I am very intolerant these days : and the thought of naked women, etc. would make me much, much less tolerante! I hope things work out with the payments for the midwife. In some ways, that's much worse than this vacation. You have a right to not expect him to go on a vacation, he has an OBLIGATION to help pay for the birth of his child!

[Treasuremapper]

Before I post, can someone please clue me in about DDC forums? What does that mean?

Also -- you are not stupid just because someone does something wrong to you. He has violated your trust. You have been honorable.

[Jenelle]

Originally Posted by inezyv

Before I post, can someone please clue me in about DDC forums? What does that mean?

"Due Date Clubs"

This post is in the January 2007 forum, because the poster is pregnant and due that month.

[Treasuremapper]

Oops, sorry, I'm not in the club either. I just saw this post on new posts and started replying and am now subscribed. :

[Ahappymel]

Originally Posted by inezyv

Oops, sorry, I'm not in the club either. I just saw this post on new posts and started replying and am now subscribed. :

I speak for myself when I say that I do not mind when others outside of the DDC respond to my posts....
Personally, your posts have been very affirming for me and I'm saying THANK YOU!

[Ahappymel]

[QUOTE=ilovemyavery;6376723]How frustrating.... : I just had to stop in to your frustrated mama thread and tell you (a) thanks for your support and (b) you have much more of a right to be pissed than I do!![QUOTE]
I am so glad that we are all here to support one another...I don't think that any one of us is to have our own experiences/emotional angst diminished because another mama is going through something too...
You have a right to your angst and I'm sure we all have our share.
I'm just so glad we all have one another for support!
On a happy note, my sis is bringing over her photography equipment tonight and doing a photo shoot for me! My little boy will be with his dad so it will be just our time together and I'll have some nice pregnancy photos!
As for my dh...he called and left a message this morning that was very loving. He also said he was FREEZING in the desert last night (can't say I feel sorry for him LOL). He also says he forgot his charger so he has minimal cell phone charge for the weekend. Nice dad-to-be...leave your pregnant woman home while you tromp to the middle of the middle of the desert AND don't take a working cell phone. Duh....

If he doesn't pay the midwife, that will be the last straw. I don't know what I'll do then but I can tell you this...I am looking after the best interest/security of me and my kid(s) first and foremost.

[Treasuremapper]

Just checking the thread to see how you are doing. Thanks for reassuring me that it is OK to post in the DDC forums.

[Zaxmama]

Mel...just popping it to say... I hope you had a lovely weekend

[velveeta]

Originally Posted by Zaxmama

Mel...just popping it to say... I hope you had a lovely weekend

Me, too. I have been feeling too sicky sick to post, but I have been keeping up with you. And thinking of you. AND sending you a

I hope you had a nice weekend.

[Ahappymel]

Hello Ladies...
Thank you so much for your care and concern and checking on me.
The weekend was not so bad.
Friday night my best friend came over and we chatted until I was so sleepy that I had to see her to the door She is talker...once she gets going, she's like me....hard to stop.
Saturday I just spent close to home with my little boy. We took a long nap together in the afternoon and then went out for a spaghetti dinner (local popular mom and pop spaghetti house) with my dad and his wife.
The major conflicts that came up over the weekend happened with my little boy...I swear that I think he picks up on my energy when I am gloomy. Whoa, does he go into a tizzy....two different times he threw incredible tantrums (one time shoving me in the stomach...that one ended with me pinning him down and tell him that HE CANNOT HIT ME). The second one happened when he wanted this sword toy and I was not willing to buy it. We didn't even make it out of the store before a total meltdown happened with him screaming that he hates me Yikes. I was feeling relieved when his dad came to get him last night for a visit.
I then spent 3 hours of just window shopping at a local mall...solitude and some peace. When I got home I took a very warm bath and went to bed.
I woke to my dh coming home...climbing into bed with me and wrapping me in a spoon embrace and giving me a bunch of kisses. I did not push him away and we just layed there in silence.
We have so much to talk about...so much came up for me emotionally this weekend (specifically, my needs for a reliable, considerate, responsible and honest partner...past partners of mine I feel failed me miserably and I am so afraid of it happening again).
So all of this is coming up for me. I'm sure I'm not the only pregnant woman who has major issues surface during pregnancy...I'm just the one getting all of the attention in this thread

[Ahappymel]

Originally Posted by velveeta

Me, too. I have been feeling too sicky sick to post, but I have been keeping up with you. And thinking of you. AND sending you a

I hope you had a nice weekend.

I hope you are feeling better! I have been sick this whole last week too!
Bronchial virus/cough...but feeling much better now...hope you are on the mend as well.

[Treasuremapper]

I look forward to more updates. It sounds like you are very sweet and very strong.

[Ahappymel]

UPDATE:

I forgot to come back and update : )
DH came home from said "relaxing" worktrade/retreat. I admit, I gave him the cold shoulder despite his affectionate advances for a few days. We didn't really have a chance to discuss anything until the week had ended...the week was busy (I work out of the home full-time during the day and then at night, it's the dinner/make lunches for the next day/bedtime/brushing teeth and reading routine for my 5 yr old...I fall asleep the same time as my little one-about 8 p.m.).
When we finally had a chance to discuss the previous weekend's events, it turns out that a person was seriously injured/disfigured during the trip and he was involved in administering emergency attention. He was quite jarred by the trauma of the experience to say the least. I admit that a lot of my ill feelings about the trip dissolved when I heard about what he had witnessed.
What a horrible experience for the injured person and also for those who witnessed it. I guess my empathy took over...a lot of the hard feelings dissolved in empathy and comfort. It also paved the way to a very open discussion in which I told him exactly how I felt and we arrived at some great agreements/resolutions.
Then he showed me a check he got for his work over the weekend...so it wasn't just a trade he negotiated after all...he got paid! : )
AND last week before the midwife appt he promptly counted 12 one hundred dollar bills into my hand : ) Yea!

[angel1895]

hmm.. thats sad about the guy... what happened to him?? slip in the hot tub??

and hey.. men handing over money.. thats a sight to see.. good for you!

[Ahappymel]

The man fell into a pit of hot lava rocks....it peeled the skin right off of the charred parts of his skin and he started to go into shock. They had to drive him to local hospital several miles away..the hospital winded up air-lifting him elsewhere.
My dh was the one holding him and comforting him while a couple of others tried to administer what little emergency care they could.
As for men handing over money...well, I admit I've had boyfriends in the past who were quite good at handing over money and it was nice but...not nearly as nice as when it represents a partner honoring his promises.