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NEED ADVICE! Jehovah Witness nanny... - Page 3

post #41 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by jennica View Post
That's too bad. The religion encourages it's members to "be no part of the world". They can associate with "worldly" people, but only with work or sometimes with unbelieving relatives, but are encouraged to not associate with "worldy" friends.

It is not our religion that encourages us to "be no part of the world", but Jesus through the Bible at John 17:16. This does not mean people exactly, Jehovah's Witnesses love everyone, that is one of the reasons why we go from door to door. There are several ways of being "no part of the world" all of them being taken from Jesus Christ's example. JW's do not get involved in political affairs of the world, we remain neutral. When Jesus was questioned by the Roman governor Pontius Pilate, he stated: “My kingdom is no part of this world.” In response to a question as to Jesus’ role, he told the governor: “For this I have been born, and for this I have come into the world, that I should bear witness to the truth.” (John 18:36,*37) When the Devil offered him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory, he refused. When the people wanted to make him king, he withdrew. (Matt. 4:8-10; John 6:15) Jehovah's Witnesses do not sidestep the fact that Jesus referred to the Devil as “the ruler of the world” and said that the Devil ‘had no hold on him.’ (John 14:30) They could see that Jesus did not seek involvement for himself or his followers in Rome’s political system but that he was fully occupied with declaring “the good news of the kingdom of God.”—Luke 4:43. We also shun the spirit of the world—its aims, ambitions, and hopes, as well as its selfish ways as brought out at John 2:15-17.

So please don't think we are shunning people when we say we are "no part of the world". We work shoulder to shoulder with people that are not JW's. Our children go to school with other children who are not JW's. In connection with avoiding the badness of the world and associating with God’s people, the apostle Paul wrote: “Do not become unevenly yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership do righteousness and lawlessness have? Or what fellowship does light have with darkness? .*.*. Or what portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever? .*.*. For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said: ‘I shall reside among them and walk among them, and I shall be their God, and they will be my people.’ ‘“Therefore get out from among them, and separate yourselves,” says Jehovah, “and quit touching the unclean thing,’” ‘“and I will take you in.’” ‘“And I shall be a father to you, and you will be sons and daughters to me,” says Jehovah the Almighty.’” Notice the repeated advice about avoiding wrong association, ‘from these turn away,’ ‘get out from among them,’ ‘separate yourselves,’ and then ‘I will take you in.’ There is to be no partnership, no fellowship, no portion, no sharing with unbelievers. In other words, no association with them if one is to associate with God.—2*Cor. 6:14-18; Ezek. 37:27, RS; Isa. 52:11; Ezek. 20:41, RS. Paul warned Christians against associating with those who had no hope in a resurrection and hence no real incentive to right conduct. “Do not be misled. Bad associations spoil useful habits. Wake up to soberness in a righteous way and do not practice sin, for some are without knowledge of God.” (1*Cor. 15:33, 34)
post #42 of 77
I'm sorry
post #43 of 77
Coming in late here, but I wanted to just add that we are a Hindu ecclectic family and we were targed by one JW lady and she always brought a younger woman with her. They came by several times. Dh talked to them once and told them we were Hindu. The next week they brought a tract that was specifically targeted at Hindus. It had Hindu gods in the book, people wearing traditional Hindu clothing in the act of worship. It explained how Hinduism was a false religion and why. The information was incorrect in many places. At the end of the book it showed JW-Indian familes, without bindis, wearing traditional dress and praying in the Christian manner. As if to say you can shed your religion but not your culture. Here's a little tidbit I found on-line: http://www.watchtower.org/library/w/...article_02.htm The definition of Karma is not even correct!

Just be prepared if you happen to get that one from her. I hope that she respects your wishes and keeps being the terrrific nanny that she is.
post #44 of 77
havent had a chance to read all 3 pages, but read enough that i just wanted to say, i went to high school with two JWs, and spent many lunches with one, and honestly, they were just two regular girls. never tryed to convert me, only looked a little embarraseed when i asked them what they got for christmas, and i was gently reminded that they didnt celebrate christmas. never felt any judgement whatsoever, and i was openly atheist at that time. they did tell me that they went door to door, as it was required, but it seemed that they did that work in a certain time and place- never at school.
post #45 of 77
[QUOTE=southernboy66;6492856] This does not mean people exactly, Jehovah's Witnesses love everyone, that is one of the reasons why we go from door to door. . JW's do not get involved in political affairs of the world, we remain neutral.
QUOTE]

You forgot to mention that another reason JWs go door-to-door is because they will have bloodguilt if they don't....

Funny you should mention that JWs are neutral and not involved with the world..... Have you not heard that the WBTS has been associating with the UN? There are documents about this at the UN's website, IIRC.

As a former-JW-now-a-Christian raised in a family full of JWs....I can't help but post when anything like this comes up. I've been there done that. I know what they believe, what they do, and why. I also know that many of them are sincere kind people...they are just sorely misled and cannot even fathom that they do not have "the truth" like they think.

fyrfly
post #46 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by southernboy66 View Post
So please don't think we are shunning people when we say we are "no part of the world". We work shoulder to shoulder with people that are not JW's. Our children go to school with other children who are not JW's. In connection with avoiding the badness of the world and associating with God’s people, the apostle Paul wrote: “Do not become unevenly yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership do righteousness and lawlessness have? Or what fellowship does light have with darkness? .*.*. Or what portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever? .*.*. For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said: ‘I shall reside among them and walk among them, and I shall be their God, and they will be my people.’ ‘“Therefore get out from among them, and separate yourselves,” says Jehovah, “and quit touching the unclean thing,’” ‘“and I will take you in.’” ‘“And I shall be a father to you, and you will be sons and daughters to me,” says Jehovah the Almighty.’” Notice the repeated advice about avoiding wrong association, ‘from these turn away,’ ‘get out from among them,’ ‘separate yourselves,’ and then ‘I will take you in.’ There is to be no partnership, no fellowship, no portion, no sharing with unbelievers. In other words, no association with them if one is to associate with God.—2*Cor. 6:14-18; Ezek. 37:27, RS; Isa. 52:11; Ezek. 20:41, RS. Paul warned Christians against associating with those who had no hope in a resurrection and hence no real incentive to right conduct. “Do not be misled. Bad associations spoil useful habits. Wake up to soberness in a righteous way and do not practice sin, for some are without knowledge of God.” (1*Cor. 15:33, 34)
So what are YOU doing on a discussion board full of lawles sinning unbelievers who the bible clearly tells you not to associate with? At your last district convention you were harshly warned to stay off the internet, even agreeing to a resolution that stated you would not go online and associate with "worldy" people. Yet here you are. Don't you know that we may corrupt you by showing you the truth about your religion. Like what the above poster said about the UN. It is true, see; http://www.un.org/dpi/ngosection/pdfs/watchtower.pdf Why does a religion that condemns the UN join it for 10 years? And why do they threaten to disfellowship any member that talks to any other member about their UN involvment? There are plenty of other things I could tell you about your religion that sheds a lot of light on whether or not it is the one and only true religion. So you better get off the evil internet and away from us devil possessed people of the world, before your fragile faith is shaken.
post #47 of 77
Go to http://www.watchtower.org/
I agree with what Jennica said, I am disfellowshipped (ex JW). I was not born into it though, but I would never go back!
Jennica, you sound bitter and it will eventually pass. Good luck to you (wait your not suppose to say that) If your family are JW it may be hard but believe me it's worth it to live without all the guilt. Feel free to PM me if you like.

Donnie- fully attached Mommy to MSMF 01-20-2006
: : :
post #48 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by GEMINI69 View Post
Go to http://www.watchtower.org/
I agree with what Jennica said, I am disfellowshipped (ex JW). I was not born into it though, but I would never go back!
Jennica, you sound bitter and it will eventually pass. Good luck to you (wait your not suppose to say that) If your family are JW it may be hard but believe me it's worth it to live without all the guilt. Feel free to PM me if you like.
Umm, yeah, I'm a little bitter. Sorry I brought that into this thread :

Leaving was the right decision for me, and it has been very freeing. Thanks for the advice
post #49 of 77

Wow

Coming in a little bit late here...

But I am also one of Jehovah's Witnesses. All those harsh comments from other posters aside, to the original poster, If you tell your nanny in no uncertain terms that you do not wish for your family and your children be involved in any religious conversation, then she won't do it, and she will respect your wishes.

But as a side note, you must also respect her for who she is. Jehovah's Witnesses whole lives revolve around their faith. If your nanny is one of Jehovah's Witnesses, and did not just pick that tract up from off the front step or something like that (quite possible from what you describe in your first post), she won't be involved in your family's holidays.

Your children may become curious as to why she is not involved, and she may take the time to simply explain to them why. The same way a nanny from another culture may have certain traditions, and may find herself explaining what these traditions mean to the curious children, so may be the situation your nanny finds herself in about her faith. You have to ask yourself how you will handle this should the time come? How will you ask her to handle it should the children become curious about certain things about her? It would seem to me that you should probably sit down and have a discussion with her about it.
post #50 of 77
My stepmom is a disfellowshipped JW and when I was a kid we lived a block away from the nearest kingdom hall. Several of the neighbors, and members of dsm's family who lived nearby, were all JW's. They used to come to the house to talk to try to get her to come back and talk to us kids about it. Because they believe strongly in parental authority, particularly of the father, they were always very conscientious about how my non-JW dad felt about this, the fact that my stepmom had been involved with them before she even met him notwithstanding. If she had said "no, I've had it with this religion, go away," or if my dad, as the man of the house, had said "don't come here anymore, don't talk to our kids" I'm sure they would have dropped it. There was no social shunning of dsm for being disfellowshipped, and no hard sell or judgment when we were in her JW relatives' homes.

In high school I had a friend who was JW. She and I talked about it, but I never really heard her talking about it to other people and I got the sense that she was only open to talking to me about it because of my family experience. One time my boyfriend and I wanted to bring her to a theme park or something with a group of people, and since she normally didn't socialize outside of school I was selected (as the JW-savvy person in the group) to call up her house and sell her dad on the idea. He politely explained to me that in and of itself he would have no problem, but she had younger siblings who were only allowed to socialize with JW children outside of school, and he felt it would be unfair and a bad example to have different rules for the eldest. After high school she attended the elite private university in our city as a commuter student, to prepare for her chosen career.

JWs do have the specific belief in formal proselytization, but in day to day interaction they are less judgmental and less obsessed with the idea that nonbelievers are evil than many fundamentalist Baptist-style etc Protestant evangelicals I have known. In general I would have to say that they are very gentle people.
post #51 of 77
Oh man, there has been aLOT of misrepresentation on this thread! I'm a JW too, we're normal...seriously.

Don't worry, most JWs are pretty cool people. Sure there is a range of personalities, just like with anything else, but you will probably have a good experience with your MH!
post #52 of 77
My first nanny was Born Again. We didn't not learn until about year into her tenure. We new she was very, very religious but not to the full extent of her beliefs,

As my son got older she became more open in her beliefs to the point pf proselytizing. As she became closer to us ans saw that we had no intention of raising our child in the faith she felt it was her duty to convert us. She brought my son in bible camp at her church. Did she think he wouldn't tell us? She gave him jesus coloring books. We had many, many talks w/ her to no avail. The breaking point was her leaving us a tract that basically said:

"John did every thing right in his life. He worked hard and loved his family. He ate well and exercised. But last Tuesday John died leaving his family alone for John didn't so one thing right. He did not accept jesus into his life"

It was then we realized that no matter how much we loved her and she loved us she thought we were damned. It was impacting our relationship and her ability to do the job. It was one of the reason we let her go.

My point is that the JW may be wonderful and loving and caring but eventually she needs to do what she is meant to do. Our nannies beliefs were to save the ones you love and when she realized she couldn't save us she was going to do everything to save our son.

She is still a part of lives on a casual basis (she had practically been family!) but I no longer felt she spend that much time alone w/ our son.

I would continue to talk to her so that she is aware of how you feel and play it by ear. If she can keep religion and job separate you should be fine.
post #53 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn82 View Post
Oh man, there has been aLOT of misrepresentation on this thread! I'm a JW too, we're normal...seriously.
I was a JW for 31 years, and nothing on this thread said anything contrary to the truth that they believe in. It was simply said in a way that a JW would not say it. However nothing was false or misrepresented.
post #54 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by grisandole View Post
This is my current experience with the Witnesses. Brief and cordial.
Me too...
post #55 of 77
I'm sorry for bumping such an old thread, but I came across it using the search function and I just had to post.

I spent 5 years working as a nanny before taking a year off to work at an office job. Recently I decided that I missed being a nanny, and I wanted to find a new family to go work for. I have experience, excellent references, I drive, don't smoke, yadda yadda yadda (here's a post I made on craigslist looking for a job, so you can get a better idea of what I'm all about: http://newjersey.craigslist.org/kid/398114962.html) so you think it would be easy, right? No.

I began studying with the JW's approx 6 months ago, and I've made the decision to go forward with converting to the religion, which means I have certain obligations (meetings that all witnesses attend on a weekly basis) and I cannot work past a certain time (6:30pm) on Monday and Wednesday evenings. I've had a couple phone interviews with people, and whenever the topic of hours and scheduling comes up, I mention that I have a religious comittment on those days and cannot work past 6:30pm. I've been questioned as to which religion, and I always reply honestly, that I'm studying to become a Witness. People immediately change their whole attitude once I mention this, and one woman even called me back this morning to tell me that she spoke with her husband and that he didnt feel comfortable with a Witness caring for their children, and that she would have to cancel my in person interview. Some people don't even get past "relgious comittment." They don't even ask what religion, and I've heard things like "oh, we're not religious people, I don't think this would work." Are you kidding me? I can't work for you because I believe in God?

I don't understand what the big deal is. I have wonderful references and it's not like I'm going to try to convert their children---I fully understand that work is work, play is play, and religion is religion....and you shouldn't ever mix them up with each other! I've even explained this to the potential employers over the phone, and they don't seem to care.

I don't want to have to lie--obviously that's not very Christian like, and if they ever found out the truth, I doubt they'd have any trust left in me. I'm just so frustrated that I can't find a job, all because of how I view God. I'm more than qualified for any of the positions I was trying to get, and it really hurts to be judged this way because of my religion.

Well, anyway, I guess thats the end of my rant. I'd appreciate any feedback from anyone on this forum, and I'm certainly going to go back and carefully read all the responses above mine.
post #56 of 77
As an Atheist who married into a JW family I can tell you that while you don't
"intentionally" try to "convert" them certain aspects of your religion are overbearing. You may not even realize you are doing it. It might just be part of "who you are" but it comes across as preaching to people who are not religious.

Also think about this,

What are you going to do when the children want you to read them a Christmas book? What will you say to them if they give you a Christmas present? How about birthdays? Halloween? Easter?

Will you refuse to read book that talks about the easter bunny or ghosts and goblins to them? If so, and they ask why what will you tell them? That it is against your religion and why? Depending on the age of the child that could come across as teaching my children things that do not fall within my beliefs.

I mean think of how many times kids come home and say Oh this must be true cause teacher said so? So if the nanny says having a birthday party is bad it MUST BE.

And yes, I am sorry, because you believe in god means you have beliefs that I do not agree with. And when it comes to caring for my children I don't want someone who is going to share beliefs, however intentionally, that I don't agree with. When the children are old enough to understand that there are many different beliefs and are old enough to think on their own maybe.. but really young children can't think on their own and they look up to their care givers and believe what they tell them.

FWIW. I don't leave my kid with my MIL either. It has taken me 10 years to get her to keep them to herself and stop trying to share them with me. I don't trust her not to share them with my children when I am not present. It is just "part of who she is" and she doesn't see anything wrong with it. She is trying to "save" her grandchildren. What is to stop you from trying to "save" these children that you will surely come to care for?
post #57 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessieann View Post

Well, anyway, I guess thats the end of my rant. I'd appreciate any feedback from anyone on this forum, and I'm certainly going to go back and carefully read all the responses above mine.
If you genuinely don't understand where the negative reaction is coming from I would suggest spending some time online reading sites of ex witnesses and other skeptics about the religion and maybe that will give you better perspective.

Or let's try thinking about it from another perspective... What would be your requirements of a child care giver for your child? Would you hire someone who was an atheist who believed a core responsibility of their atheism was to testify to that atheism to people, including your children? Would you hire someone that you believed was in a cult?
post #58 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by aniT View Post
As an Atheist who married into a JW family I can tell you that while you don't
"intentionally" try to "convert" them certain aspects of your religion are overbearing. You may not even realize you are doing it. It might just be part of "who you are" but it comes across as preaching to people who are not religious.

Also think about this,

What are you going to do when the children want you to read them a Christmas book? What will you say to them if they give you a Christmas present? How about birthdays? Halloween? Easter?

Will you refuse to read book that talks about the easter bunny or ghosts and goblins to them? If so, and they ask why what will you tell them? That it is against your religion and why? Depending on the age of the child that could come across as teaching my children things that do not fall within my beliefs.

I mean think of how many times kids come home and say Oh this must be true cause teacher said so? So if the nanny says having a birthday party is bad it MUST BE.

And yes, I am sorry, because you believe in god means you have beliefs that I do not agree with. And when it comes to caring for my children I don't want someone who is going to share beliefs, however intentionally, that I don't agree with. When the children are old enough to understand that there are many different beliefs and are old enough to think on their own maybe.. but really young children can't think on their own and they look up to their care givers and believe what they tell them.

FWIW. I don't leave my kid with my MIL either. It has taken me 10 years to get her to keep them to herself and stop trying to share them with me. I don't trust her not to share them with my children when I am not present. It is just "part of who she is" and she doesn't see anything wrong with it. She is trying to "save" her grandchildren. What is to stop you from trying to "save" these children that you will surely come to care for?
I understand your points----but to me it's no different than if I were Jewish and working for a Christian family, or visa versa (I actually did work for a Jewish family once, and we didn't run into any problems at all.) I would never in a thousand years say something or teach a child something that went against their parents wishes. I would never tell a child that something they do (like having a bday, celebrating halloween, etc) was bad. If anything, I'd just laugh and say something along the lines of "oh, I'm too old to dress up for halloween!" I believe in remaining very neutral with non-JW's. It's only fair that I respect their beliefs and customs, because I believe I deserve the same respect from them. When the child from the jewish family would ask me why I didn't celebrate the jewish holidays, I just said "because my family isn't Jewish" and he was completely okay with that.

I'm just curious....why did you marry into a JW family, if you don't share those sort of beliefs? That is, assuming your husband is still a Witness.....he may not be any longer, and in that case, I could understand it a little better, but still, you had to know that your children would be exposed to it, being as his mother is a witness, no?
post #59 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roar View Post
If you genuinely don't understand where the negative reaction is coming from I would suggest spending some time online reading sites of ex witnesses and other skeptics about the religion and maybe that will give you better perspective.

Or let's try thinking about it from another perspective... What would be your requirements of a child care giver for your child? Would you hire someone who was an atheist who believed a core responsibility of their atheism was to testify to that atheism to people, including your children? Would you hire someone that you believed was in a cult?
If I were hiring someone to take care of my child, I would look for someone mature, responsible, experienced and that I felt I could trust. I don't care if they're jewish, christian, pagen, atheist, etc. What it boils down to is their ability to provide a safe, loving and fun environment for the child. Like I said in my original post----work is work, religion is religion. I haven't ever, nor do I ever plan or intend on mixing the two.
post #60 of 77
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessieann View Post
I'm just curious....why did you marry into a JW family, if you don't share those sort of beliefs? That is, assuming your husband is still a Witness.....he may not be any longer, and in that case, I could understand it a little better, but still, you had to know that your children would be exposed to it, being as his mother is a witness, no?
My husband is non-active. We had not only been dating awhile, but had already decided to get married AND I was pregnant before he even TOLD me his family was JW. He was embarrassed that he was JW. He knew that people see a JW and run the other way. And to be honest, had he told me that from the beginning I probably WOULD have run the other way. But since he was non-active I guess he didn't consider himself a JW enough to tell until he HAD to.
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