THE November 4 YO tribe ...

[majazama]

Is it cold where you are? Tis pretty cold here. we had snow the other day!

[DecemberSun]

Hi all.

My brother in WA sent me a picture of snow on the road a few days ago. Right now, here in AZ, we have the windows open and it's about 78 degrees!!!

[Awaken]

Hi. I haven't joined the thread the past couple months but I'll jump in this time. It's so warm here!!! In the 70's today. We spent the whole morning outside. Gotta enjoy it while it lasts!

[abranger]

It's warm for November here probably high 60's today

[Mona]

we had a pretyy good samhain celebration, albeit small, and i still feel the fires burning.:

more later, it seems K has either really bad allergies today, a cold, or some real shift from our cranial sacral appt yesterday. lots of nursing going on. :

[MamaFern]

its frosty here, for sure! i was really cold last night trick-or-treating with elwynn and the other kiddos.. he was batman..ngaio didnt make it out(but she was a baby bat at the church halloween party) and i dressed up like a zombie prom queen ..with a long bright pink wig and tiara and a fancy dress that made my boobs pop out and have crazy cleavage (thanks mamamilk ). it was rather fun!

jazz, i hear you about tantrums. ngaio's already having them. her thing is to whak her head on the floor or whatever is around.. : shes so funny and weird when she gets mad. i try not to laugh but its pretty comical..

[XmasEve]

hmm, cold at night, but not when the sun's shining during the day. Dc's pretty easy in this weather, as she still let's me pick out her clothes for the most part, so I can pick out something appropriate.

[goddessjulia]

downright balmy here today; I wish it was a bit chillier myself!

ds was a skeleton for halloween (his idea). I got him a black turtleneck and sweats and cut out bones from white felt and sewed them on. I was rather satisfied with myself when I got it all done

I was a total dud on samhain-- I barely put out coffee for my granny trick-or-treating was ok, once we finally found some houses to go to. this was our first time really going. not many people get into it around here-- ultraconservative area. one young teen rode past us on a bike wearing a LOTR ghoul-type mask (I forget the name for that creature), which looked totally real at bike-ride-by speed. ds was okay, but very impressed to the point of being speechless to see a "real" creature like that! then at one house, the granddad was running around the yard in a torn shirt with red on it growling at all the kids. even though ds had seen him do it and was clearly marching away quickly, he still snuck up behind us and roared. it scared ds pretty bad and he screamed back, meanwhile I'm thinking wtf is your problem man?? but after ds screamed at him he cried and ran away, so that helped the situation a little.

I can't believe his birthday is just around the corner!!

[tea olive]

today was high 83. this means the mosquitoes were swarming so bad that my kids couldn't play outside. when it drops below 70 and the humidity is less, plua the slight "winter" breeze, we are okay. some of us locals complain it is freaking hot. we are tired of warm.

okay, i hate to reopen the topic, but i have something to say about the stranger yelling. i am at a point with my kids that i cannot just turn my back on silly stranger behaviour if i have the energy to deal with it. my kids are watching my example very closely and they are where they quiz me about motives and actions and meanings. i also feel i have to show them a better way to cope instead of being rude or ignoring running away. which is what my kids tend to do to me when i am yelling at them for what seems unreasonable to them. i have a peripheral reason as well - i want to go beyond the us versus them mentality, that i believe hinders village and community thinking. oops, i'm getting too woo-woo. i guess i'm trying to say that i can only find that behaving respectfully towards other people as humans seems the right way for me to teach my kids, even if the others are being nincompoops.

remember, i have the kids that have behaved all kinds of badly to family and strangers. so i have had to look for a higher ideal, and modeling appropriate kindness has made a big difference with my kids.

so i'm at a point where i generally try to acknowledge the persons exist respectfully, and if i say something that can benefit the situation or so that they will think about what they are doing or at least alleviate the tension, or give them an opportunity to be helpful, than i say so. again, this depends on my energy whether i am feeling sincere and pleasant or jolly. yes, this basically means i have to shock educate these strangers to do better as well.

so the question is, what do we say to this guy? or, how would i want my grown child to react?

sorry, i guess this practically asking to behave like gandhi. i like to figure out goals to move towards though, even if me and mine are still behaving ugly lots of the time.

[nancy926]

It's been grand here, sunny and 40s-50s. That's grand for Vermont in November.

DD is very....dramatic....touchy....something like that lately. Her solution to not getting her way is to ska-REEM. Way out of context. The other day at a Halloween party she did it and I ran over, thinking she'd been truly hurt. Turns out a little boy wouldn't let her hide under this play structure with him. ????

I talk to her about other ways she could express herself but right now all we get is screaming. Oh, and sometimes she will point at us and spit. That's nice too. I know where she got that (another kid at playgroup) so I usually say Oh, that's what H used to do to you and you didn't like it, right? But if I'm not my most patient self I just tell her to cut it out. LOL.

Anyway. Hard to believe she will be 4 in only a few weeks. She can act so "mature" and then so...NOT....all in the span of 10 minutes!

[XmasEve]

Nancy, I know what you mean. Just pick a maturity level and stay there for a minute, would you please?!

Tea Olive, you make my head spin. I thought Fern and her partner handled it great, now you've got me giving it in-depth thought, which I don't have the brain cells for. Some months back when I was out with the kids, dc2 on my back in a wrap, we were approached by a woman who said she was a nurse and I needed to get my baby a stroller as her head was being whipped all over the place in that thing and it was bad for her. She was being very civil so I gave her my standard civil (ie. lie) response. "Thank you for your concern, but my doctor encourages this for me and my baby." She got tart and said she knew more than my doctor and walked away. I let it go.

The next day, dc1 asked why we carry dc2 in the wrap if it's bad for her.
WTF?
Well, that woman said it was bad.
She was wrong, she doesn't understand about wrapping babies.
Then why didn't you tell her she was wrong, and teach her about wrapping babies?

It turned into a discussion and dc's very mature reasoning was that the next time that happened SHE would speak up and tell the person about wrapping and how good it is for babies.

But this woman was speaking to us in a conversational tone and removed herself in the end. A person running out on the sidewalk and screaming is different. I wouldn't want my child to engage with them. Acknowledge them, but don't engage them- they obviously aren't in the mood for conversation. If I tried to speak with them, I imagine both of us would end up yelling.

On second thought Fern, maybe you should have pulled out your knitting needles and threatened him :

Julia, some crazy dad did that to me as a kid, and I never trick-or-treated again. Never had a cavity after that either, so maybe I should thank him.

[saritasmile]

Hi everyone! Just checkin' in. Sooo, I guess Razi gets to kick off the birthdays today is his. He really wants cake-not a big deal except we just got all of that halloween candy (i've been limiting it but still...he gets naughty when he gets high fructose corn syrup.)
Trick or treating was fun- Razi was a pirate too. It was freezing and I had little sister in a sling under my down jacket--i got some weird looks,

Things are much better in the night sleeping w/ sister. Thanks casina for giving me a little perspective on what's important. cuz really spit up is no big deal. Dp is back to work today.

Fern, sorry you had to deal w/ that lame-o guy. i have no idea what I would have done.

So nice to see new 'faces' here...don't worry, I still love : the old ones

[MamaFern]

HAPPY4th BIRTHDAYRAZI!!!

::<-- for you sarita because its your birthday too!

[majazama]

Originally Posted by MamaFern

HAPPY4th BIRTHDAYRAZI!!!

::<-- for you sarita because its your birthday too!

yeah, that. hehe

[Mona]

Originally Posted by MamaFern

HAPPY4th BIRTHDAYRAZI!!!

::<-- for you sarita because its your birthday too!

Hope you have a great day!!! Can't wait to hear about the details.

[abranger]

Ladies it's that time of year The MDC NeedyMom/HelperMom thread is here. I've been lucky enough to be a helper mom for 2 years and it has really been a huge gift to our family. Check it out http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=550285

[tea olive]

sorry for the head spinning. i DO think fern handled it great. i'm just talking about myself really.

[XmasEve]

Happy happy birthdays birthdays Razi and Sarita!!

[Awaken]

Originally Posted by MamaFern

i dressed up like a zombie prom queen ..with a long bright pink wig and tiara and a fancy dress that made my boobs pop out and have crazy cleavage (thanks mamamilk ). it was rather fun!

..

LOL, fern, I thought you had written "i dressed her up like a zombie prom queen" with the boobs popping out and cleavage, and I was like, whoa, ngaio!! good thing I had that wrong!

[MamaFern]

Originally Posted by itsybitsy25

LOL, fern, I thought you had written "i dressed her up like a zombie prom queen" with the boobs popping out and cleavage, and I was like, whoa, ngaio!! good thing I had that wrong!

hahahaha yeah.. no kidding! that would have been a bit over the top :P