or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Archives › Pregnancy and Birth Archives › Due Date Clubs 2004 - 2008  › May 2007 › Weekly Thread Nov 6th- 12th
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Weekly Thread Nov 6th- 12th - Page 3

post #41 of 56
Did you drop the classes already? It does seem rude to do that without discussing it with DH first.
Did you find out how much a homebirth midwife like yours makes? And the difference in cost between the two educational routes?
Also consider the different amounts of work. At least around here, CNMs are just part of a practice, so even if they could deliver they'd only be on call some of the time. Home birth midwives are ALWAYS on call. Their families get the shaft when a bunch of patients give birth in a short time, or when one mom has an extremely long labor. That is not something I would do while my kids are young. This really is a decision your DH should be involved in. But I agree that he should get over the money factor, because loving your work is much more important.
post #42 of 56
Quote:
Originally Posted by kdtmom2be View Post
Woohoo! How exciting, I now really KNOW what Braxton Hick contraction feel like. How neat! Maybe not neat later, if they start to bug me, but neat right now! Am I weird?
I'm also getting them already. I get them earlier with each pregnancy. My OB says its no big deal. I have an "Irritable Uterus". Reminds me of that Sex & the City episode about the depressed vagina.
post #43 of 56
Hi Gang,
I hope all of you that are sick or whose children are sick --- feel well soon!

Today I swore I was having contractions for about 5 hours. I had to go get some groceries and hoisting two 40 pound kids plus groceries in a huge warehouse type environment (where you have to bag it yourself etc) set me off.
I also noticed my vision was blurry the other day.

I have not been taking care of myself this pregnancy. I'm depressed. I ask for help from my mom and I get told "Well your dh needs to start helping more, cause its bs everything you have to do.". Like, gee thanks I know that.

She is supportive dont get me wrong...but on her terms.

Ok can I rant about that wee subject just a little?
I do everything. Grocery shop, child care, laundry, house cleaning, cooking, managing the finances as best I can, yardwork, everything! The only thing I ask of him is to once in a while change a dipe, make a juicy cup, or take out trash every couple days. That's it!
Today he comes home on his break from work and he starts harping on the bills. It's really hard to pay ALL of the bills when you don't have ALL of the money for them. So completely stresses me out because I feel like its 'my fault' he's unhappy how I am handling the bills.

Then there is the girls "They are spoiled" "You baby them" "You don't discipline them" "You got to quit feeding them junk" (A couple times a week I nuke a hotpocket or can of chicken noodle soup and call that lunch. Yes it isnt ideal, but damnit I need a break too!)
So tonight I am in pain from all the work I did and hes like "Well did you take your vitamins?" all like its my fault I'm in pain cause I hadn't taken my vits!

It would just be so much better if he offered help or was kind to me instead of ...I dont know.
I feel severely unappreciated right now, and ... trapped. Like, nothing I do is good enough, and no one cares about me being pregnant. Its all negative to me. Is it just the horomones or what?? I am very sad ):

I realized my bday is two weeks away and I looked in the mirror and I looked like crap. Tired, old for 23, in bad need of some TLC.

Who cares for us moms?

ETA: Also my dad and stepmom/friend are headed to Oahu next month. I am truly happy for them, its just that This is the 3 year anniversary of me coming back from Oahu which is something (if I didnt have the girls) I would severely regret. So that kinda set me off too. Like, I had all these ideals and false promises made about what life would be like if I came back to Oregon and...Eh its a long story. 3 years later this is my post reflecting my life...

I know I'm ungrateful. I just needed to share.
post #44 of 56
darsmama-- I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time and feeling so down. Your DH shouldn't act like that or say those things. I think that they have NO clue what it is like to be pregnant, take care of the kids, the house, and yourself.

Screaming toddler...
post #45 of 56
Katie,
You're not ungrateful. You're trying really hard to be grateful but you have it pretty rough. Grrr, your husband is totally sucking and has no idea. Are you seeing a dr or just a midwife? Can you get put on bedrest for a few weeks so he has to handle everything? Maybe then he'd understand a little.

When my husband or I are unhappy about how the other is handling a task, we change responsibility for it. I get mad when he misses the payment date on a credit card, so it becomes my responsibility to pay the bills on time. If necessary, we switch some other task to him so I have time. Make him handle the finances for a week or a month?
post #46 of 56
Wow, Katie, sounds like your DH needs to start appreciating all you do for him and his children.
post #47 of 56
Thread Starter 
I am so sorry that you are feeling so down Katie. Your dh has done this before, so he should behave differently while you are pg. Helping out is a good thing! Grr.... :

I get to take ds and the girls to the Dr today to see if ds has an ear infection and Strep. He better not have strep! I don't want the girls to get THAT and I don't have insurance for them. Ds has insurance through his autism stuff, but I can't have the girls get that kind of sick. Keep your fingers crossed his throat hurts because of nasal drip not tonsilitis or strep, and that worst case senario is an ear infection. So I will be leaving to pick him up from school shortly. Wish me luck.
post #48 of 56
Thanks ladies. I really appreciated being able to rant and get it out. I often hear about journaling and every time I start too, the girls come over, throw fits cause I won't give them the pen I write with, and any train of thought gets left to the wind. So, I badly need to just tell SOMEONE how I feel sometimes.
Thanks for being a captive audience
I appreciate it more than words can say..

I am not seeing either at this point in my pregnancy Jess. I will hopefully hear back on the health insurance (medicaid type) in the next couple weeks. My mw/friend is on vacation at the moment, and probably will be until December. I saw her the one time in September, but thats all so far.
That is a great idea with the bills. If he has a problem with them being handled, he can handle them.

Goldie: Fingers are crossed that your girls do not have Strep. However if they do, I have had miracles work with gargling with cayenne powder. Seriously! It dosen't sting at all. I found a link : http://www.earthclinic.com/CURES/sore_throat.html

Another thing is a goldenseal tincture. $15 at most at a health store, and that will help as well..

Good luck and let us know how it goes!
post #49 of 56
Quote:
Thanks for being a captive audience
anytime, sweetheart...

i hope you can manage to swipe some time for yourself...doesn't a nice warm bath with lavender in the water, soft music and candlelight flickering sound divine?? Well.....it's nothing to feel guilty over--go r-e-l-a-x, mama! :
post #50 of 56
I vote for a nice warm bath with lavender or something in the water. The rest sounds like too much prep and you'll get interrupted before you're even in the water.
Be sure not to run the washer right before you get in. At least you don't have to worry about DH starting it up on you.
post #51 of 56
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessitron View Post
At least you don't have to worry about DH starting it up on you.
post #52 of 56
Quote:
Originally Posted by darsmama View Post
Ok can I rant about that wee subject just a little?
I do everything. Grocery shop, child care, laundry, house cleaning, cooking, managing the finances as best I can, yardwork, everything! The only thing I ask of him is to once in a while change a dipe, make a juicy cup, or take out trash every couple days. That's it!
Today he comes home on his break from work and he starts harping on the bills. It's really hard to pay ALL of the bills when you don't have ALL of the money for them. So completely stresses me out because I feel like its 'my fault' he's unhappy how I am handling the bills.

Then there is the girls "They are spoiled" "You baby them" "You don't discipline them" "You got to quit feeding them junk" (A couple times a week I nuke a hotpocket or can of chicken noodle soup and call that lunch. Yes it isnt ideal, but damnit I need a break too!)
So tonight I am in pain from all the work I did and hes like "Well did you take your vitamins?" all like its my fault I'm in pain cause I hadn't taken my vits!

It would just be so much better if he offered help or was kind to me instead of ...I dont know.
I feel severely unappreciated right now, and ... trapped. Like, nothing I do is good enough, and no one cares about me being pregnant. Its all negative to me. Is it just the horomones or what?? I am very sad ):

I realized my bday is two weeks away and I looked in the mirror and I looked like crap. Tired, old for 23, in bad need of some TLC.

Who cares for us moms?
I know how you feel, as I'm sure most mama's do
Sometimes we need TLC too!!!! I hope you feel better soon.
post #53 of 56
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessitron View Post
Be sure not to run the washer right before you get in. At least you don't have to worry about DH starting it up on you.


Ahh you gals are great. 's to you all
post #54 of 56
SO I finaly told my mom yesterday

we were talking about my dogs, and I just blurted it out while she was talking "we are having another baby in may"

she just started in about how broke we are, our house isn't big enough, I"m not organized enough, I need to get off the phone during the day and pay attention to those kids ??? (I don't even have anyone to talk to) that I am HIGH Risk because its my fifth baby ??? I don't know where she got that from.

I did tell her that it was too late to do anything now, and that the appropriate response to an announcement like this was "congratulations" she responded to that "well I"m not happy! " So I told her she would get used to it, we did.

She just kept babbling on that I need to call someone to come help organize my house.. one of those tv shows.

THe conversation went just as expected I guess, but at least she knows now
post #55 of 56
Quote:
Originally Posted by crysmomofthree View Post
SO I finaly told my mom yesterday
I did tell her that it was too late to do anything now, and that the appropriate response to an announcement like this was "congratulations" she responded to that "well I"m not happy! "
that's awful mama! ah well, it's not *her* baby I got similar reactions from my family, so I know how you feel
post #56 of 56
Quote:
Originally Posted by Krystal323 View Post
that's awful mama! ah well, it's not *her* baby I got similar reactions from my family, so I know how you feel
Yeah it does suck doesn't it? Its not like she helps us financially, or babysits, or really has anything to do with the kids. We live a 5 hour drive away. :
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: May 2007
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Archives › Pregnancy and Birth Archives › Due Date Clubs 2004 - 2008  › May 2007 › Weekly Thread Nov 6th- 12th