What can I do to help my dd?

[moonmama7]

Hi all. I can't believe I just found this forum -- what a great resource! Well I just had a very tough parent teacher conference for my 3rd grade dd. The teachers said she's bright BUT that she can be "daydreamy" and "detached." Also, just about everything needs more work - spelling, math, reading, writing.

I just don't know what to do. I KNOW she's a smart little girl and knows this stuff but why isn't it coming across? When I do the spelling lists and multiplication tables with her at home, she really seems to know them. Could she have ADD?

Just thought I'd post here and see what you ladies think.

Thanks
Violet

[ChristaN]

To have ADD, she'd need to exhibit symptoms in more than one setting. In other words, it wouldn't just be noticable at school. Is it possible that she is bored and goofing off or not paying attention? When the teachers say that she is bright but daydreamy, do they mean that she is at least at grade level in most subjects, but not paying attention?

It seems that there are different approaches depending on what is going on. If she is more advanced than the material she is being given, she may just be spacing out b/c it is not interesting to relearn material she already knows. However, if the work is not too easy, perhaps there is something else going on. Could she have a learning disability? Is the school willing to test her to get a better idea of her innate abilities and to see if there is some hidden disability there?

[blsilva]

I was like this in school, and I did not have ADD. I was bored- plain and simple. I was capable of doing my work, but the stuff inside my head was so much more interesting. My parents finally got me into a program that was great for me, worked more on thinking skills vs rote practice, and it was great. At the time (more years ago than I would care to mention...) this was the GATE program, but I have heard good and bad about that program since, so I don't really know.
What kind of work do they do that she seems to space out on? If it is all rote, bland, "practice"- i.e., writing your speling words 5 times each, doing 15 math problems (that one really did it for me: ), etc, than I would suspect that she is just not stimulated by this type of work, and see what other options there are.

[amnda527]

I agree with the above posters, maybe she is just bored! Some kids are just not into school, no matter what the topic is. If she is falling behind, then maybe see if she can get a some one on one help with a tutor at school, or at home. Is this new as of this year? Maybe it's the way the teacher runs the classroon? However, even if a previous teacher has not mentioned this, it does not mean it was not happening, just that maybe they did not notice it. Is there anything going on at home? Any little changes? Hope you figure things out.

[Liz]

Yep, that sounds like me. Every report card said, "Good but could do better". I was just not engaged by the typical school work. When I had a creative teacher who presented the material in a more engaging way I flourished. I hated school until I ended up in art school and now I'm a product designer. If school options are limited maybe just some after school or weekend classes in more creative subjects would help keep her spirits up through the school day.

[mommy68]

Originally Posted by blsilva

I was like this in school, and I did not have ADD. I was bored- plain and simple.

That was me. I was the prime candidate for a homeschooled child back in the 70's when I was in elementary school. Too bad they didn't do it back then. I always hated school and was completely bored there.