or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Birth and Beyond › Unassisted Childbirth › Help! Am I doing this to myself?!
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Help! Am I doing this to myself?! - Page 2

post #21 of 94
http://www.spinningbabies.com/index....d=61&Itemid=31

Maybe some of these positions will help baby find the right position to help pop out?
post #22 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by frontierpsych View Post
thanks kinsey-- I totally know what you mean about the c/s. I am REALLY worried that I will end up with a c/s if I am induced, because my baby is posterior and I am just fearful of induction (rightfully so, I believe) I'd be so depressed just because of induction as it is, and I will be all on my own with no help after the baby gets here-- I can't afford to have a c-section!
I will tell you that this is why we UC'd with DD. I knew if I ended up w/another unnecessary c/s, I would be even MORE depressed than I had been after DS. And DH would probably have been raising the children as a widower. Flat out.


I guess, in a way, I am thankful for my horrible experience w/DS. It led me to tell the medical community to F off (LOL!) and take responsibility for my baby and my birth - and I ended up having an amazing experience laboring w/DD. It also made/makes me EXTREMELY angry and fuels me to guard other mama's birthing experiences fiercely. I do not ever want anyone to be betrayed like I was. Or have to fight for the right to labor and birth naturally, as I did.


And you're right. With a posterior baby, you are much more likely for a c/s.

How about this? Every day that you don't go into labor w/a posterior baby is another day that your body can work on turning that baby!

I had a lot of prodromal labor w/DD, and I believe that she was posterior and was able to turn b/c I waited. I think that what I *thought* was labor w/DS was actually prodromal labor, and my body was trying to turn him (he was posterior - and I had HORRIBLE back labor). I jumped the gun w/DS, should have just stayed at home until I couldn't.


(((hugs again))) I remember how it was for me w/DS, wondering every time "is this it?". I PROMISE you, when it's real, you will know. Until then, just ignore ctx until you can't anymore.

Enjoy your last days of being child-free. I rolled my eyes when I was told this, but man! I don't even remember the last time I slept in or was able to just head out the door to run a quick errand w/out getting everybody dressed, etc. Stock up on your sleep NOW! Make your DH give you twice-daily massages (or more - milk it now, mama, cause he's getting off easy by leaving you w/a newborn, lol). Have DH make sure your house is SPOTLESS while you relax and nap. Have sex in everyroom of your house, in the middle of the afternoon! Have DH paint your toenails for you. Any leisure activities you like, do 'em till you're sick of it!


Your body knows what to do, you just need to turn your mind of and let it do it. W/DD, I played a little mindgame. By midweek each week, I'd say "okay, good, no baby. So the rest of the week I can _____. This weekend we can go to the movies. Or shopping. Or sleep in." And then (REALLY!) every day I didn't have a baby I was okay with it. b/c I had things to look forward to doing, that I couldn't do if I had the baby.


Your baby will be here very soon!

K
post #23 of 94
um...
i hate to be the one to say this, because i am fiercely pro-home ir unassisted birthing...but...
honestly,considering the situation i think its more important that her partner be at the birth, than where and how she has this baby.

my own partner is gone for several weeks at a time and it breaks my heart...if her partner has the opportunity to witness his childs birth and then not see her for nine months...it will be much easier for him to connect than if he'd never seen her at all. for many men, the fact that their partner's a re pregnant just doesn't sink in deeply until they hold theiir baby.

i dunno, i just think that looking long term at the relationship is really crucial.
post #24 of 94
Thinking of you tonight.
I know the stress of knowing your dh will be gone is so hard too. I could not imagine.
Do you have support there?
I hope so. Keep mdc close. It was so helpful to me then and still is of course!
Can you believe it! Baby will be here SOON!
post #25 of 94
yes- I am ok with the induction option in this scenario too.... It breaks my heart tho- to go from UC to induction at a hospital for her.
We are sooo not there yet tho.
Cmon baby!
post #26 of 94
Thread Starter 
Well, I've made the decision to go in tomorrow morning to have my membranes stripped. It's not what I want, but it's the best option I've got right now.
post #27 of 94
Thread Starter 
And I have tried all the spinning babies stuff she is not turning. She's been posterior from the very beginning.
post #28 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by radicalmama View Post
um...
i hate to be the one to say this, because i am fiercely pro-home ir unassisted birthing...but...
honestly,considering the situation i think its more important that her partner be at the birth, than where and how she has this baby.

my own partner is gone for several weeks at a time and it breaks my heart...if her partner has the opportunity to witness his childs birth and then not see her for nine months...it will be much easier for him to connect than if he'd never seen her at all. for many men, the fact that their partner's a re pregnant just doesn't sink in deeply until they hold theiir baby.

i dunno, i just think that looking long term at the relationship is really crucial.

This. Exactly this. I am really surprised and disappointed at most of the responses here. I think you are doing the right things going in tomorrow. You'll be in my thoughts.
post #29 of 94
mama!

You are in a tough spot. I'm so sorry about your dh & the time frame issue.


Here's the thing mama.....first babies can't be rushed. Your baby knows when the best time for birth is. Your baby needs to decide this mama. Whatever is best for this baby is going to be ultimately what's best for you.....and it's really not up to US as to when birth should occur. That is, if we want both baby and mama to be as healthy as possible.

Take care......my thoughts are with you.
post #30 of 94
Do what is best for you...no one can judge because they are not in your shoes.

My 2c worth...in reading your posts, I sensed a lot of tension and felt the need to reach out and massage you. Let it go and meditate, release your expectations and let things happen. Just focus on creating a peaceful space for your baby no matter how she gets here
post #31 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slabobbin View Post
This. Exactly this. I am really surprised and disappointed at most of the responses here. I think you are doing the right things going in tomorrow. You'll be in my thoughts.
I just wanted to say that I wasn't trying to judge or put pressures in my response. Everybody assumes things about birth. Here we often assume that the father just *must* be present for whatever reasons. That's fine if that's how those who would choose induction truely feels, but maybe it's not what the OP truely feels- I don't know. Being induced for this reason is fine, as is not being induced and risking not having the dad present. Being supportive goes both ways. That's why I said "personally" in my post. NO ONE can choose which is more important to another person.

Anyway, Frontier,
I hope the membrane stripping goes well. Since you were experiecning so much labor before I bet it really gets the hormones going! Take it easy. It won't be TOO long before your baby IS here and your pregnancy will be a blur.
post #32 of 94
I honestly think you're making a good decision. I actually talked to my husband about your circumstances last night (hope you don't mind) to see if I was off-base in my thinking. As a former Army man, he said he'd be devastated if he didn't get to hold his baby before he left for a deployment.

I think it's not so much the being present for birth issue that's going on here... it's the fact that he won't see his baby for several months afterward. I just can't imagine!

I hope your baby arrives safely with a minimum of interventions and that you and your husband can enjoy having her in your arms before he leaves. I'm sure it will mean the world to him.
post #33 of 94
I am thinking of you mama!
I hope the membrane stripping goes well!
Please keep us posted.
I can not imagine being in your shoes.
post #34 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by KrystalC View Post
I honestly think you're making a good decision. I actually talked to my husband about your circumstances last night (hope you don't mind) to see if I was off-base in my thinking. As a former Army man, he said he'd be devastated if he didn't get to hold his baby before he left for a deployment.

I think it's not so much the being present for birth issue that's going on here... it's the fact that he won't see his baby for several months afterward. I just can't imagine!

I'm totally am beating a dead horse here, oh well. I don't think it's fair to put a value judgement either way. I happened to ask my dh how he would feel if he weren't present at the birth. He very seriously said "I'd be upset". I asked if he were about to be deployed and it was likely that he would miss the birth would he want me to be induced. He very seriously (and quite loudly) said "hell no." I think it's very individual.

I have a feeling that she's in labor right now
post #35 of 94
Thread Starter 
Not in labour yet! But I had my membranes stripped this morning (baby was low and I'm 4cm) so hopefully things will get moving on their own, Tomorrow (thanksgiving) is my birthday, so she might decide to be my birthday gift after all! I also did schedule induction for the 24th-- part of me still wants to wait until they get labour going steadily and walk on out.
post #36 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by frontierpsych View Post
Not in labour yet! But I had my membranes stripped this morning (baby was low and I'm 4cm) so hopefully things will get moving on their own, Tomorrow (thanksgiving) is my birthday, so she might decide to be my birthday gift after all! I also did schedule induction for the 24th-- part of me still wants to wait until they get labour going steadily and walk on out.
Woah! 4cm! See, those "false" labors weren't false at all
Good job, take it easy, I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and sending you labor vibes.

:
post #37 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by frontierpsych View Post
I also did schedule induction for the 24th-- part of me still wants to wait until they get labour going steadily and walk on out.
Well, why not? Go back home and finish things up like you want! I'm serious - if I were in your situation and had decided to go ahead w/induction, I would not allow AROM and I would get out of there as soon as things were rolling. At home there will not be nurses "offering" AROM or drugs, or "requiring" monitoring or following "procedure". All of which (you know) you can refuse, but why keep the fight up when you could opt out?


I don't know if you were joking or not, but you could really do that if baby's not here before then.


Come on, Thanksgiving Baby! Thinking of your family, Mama!

K


Come on, baby!! Head on out of there!
post #38 of 94
I went from 1cm to 4 cms after I went and got a pedicure! They had these magnificent massage chairs to sit in and I got my toes done (at least the docs had pretty feet to look at!) If nothing else a massage will help relax you! Good Luck and I'm praying for you!!
post #39 of 94
Well, yeah, the stress may be holding it off. It just doesn't seem that would be the best state to induce in either. I'm so sorry you're in this situation.
post #40 of 94
Thinking of you mama.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Unassisted Childbirth
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Birth and Beyond › Unassisted Childbirth › Help! Am I doing this to myself?!