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June 2006 Mamas chattin' away December 2006! - Page 84

post #1661 of 1860
OH and I'm kind of excited to almost be at 500 posts. so I'll post some photos today to try to reach it.


And I really want to thank whoever gave me the DDDDC....It's making me pretty happy!
post #1662 of 1860
:
post #1663 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow's mom View Post
HI
We asked the IL's if maybe next year they could stick to one gift for Mars. I saw how horrible my 6 year old niece was about her gifts and I really don't want my kid to be so ummm..bratty. She says things like "that's all I got", and "I didn't ask for this, can we go get what I wanted?". Maybe I am remembering things wrong but isn't 6 old enough to know better?

And isn't 3 old enough to not chew up a bunch of creamed corn and run over and empty your mouth on Aunt Lindsey? I said ew, gross don't do that. and Lee's mom said "he's only 3, you can't expect him to know better". Is she right?

.

Well, at 6 my kids actually realized they could ask for things they wanted and have a good chance at getting them at Christmas. So it is probably fairly appropriate for them to be dissapointed and say so. I think that was the year my daughter burst into tears over a gift. I sit down with my kids BEFORE presents and remind them how to respond, even if they don't like something. It is a hard thing for them to learn, on one hand we encourage them to express their feelings, on the other we expect them to know when to supress them and be polite. It takes time, but mostly maturity on their part.

As for the three year old, yuck. Totally was looking for attention. Was he getting any attention that day, or was he sort of acting up to get a rise out of people?
post #1664 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Caroline248 View Post
As for the three year old, yuck. Totally was looking for attention. Was he getting any attention that day, or was he sort of acting up to get a rise out of people?
He is always getting attention but I guess maybe he gets a lot of mixed messages. His grandparents are always letting him do anything (he's a boy, so they allow for extra stuff like that and kind of encourage his "boyness"). I just seems like no one ever tells him that maybe some things are not nice for other people. Like he's always stomping on the other kids' toys to try to break them and no one says a thing.

He's a very "rough" kid.
post #1665 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by mommitola View Post
:
hmmmmm.... you aren't really admitting to anything. hmmmmmm a mystery.
post #1666 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Caroline248 View Post
Well, at 6 my kids actually realized they could ask for things they wanted and have a good chance at getting them at Christmas. So it is probably fairly appropriate for them to be dissapointed and say so. I think that was the year my daughter burst into tears over a gift. I sit down with my kids BEFORE presents and remind them how to respond, even if they don't like something. It is a hard thing for them to learn, on one hand we encourage them to express their feelings, on the other we expect them to know when to supress them and be polite. It takes time, but mostly maturity on their part.

I see your point with that. I don't know why but I have a angry feeling when the kids are like this. But I understand that it's appropriate for her age. Maybe I'm having a residual feeling from my childhood. I know I would have been whacked if I had acted like that. But I would never hit my kids (or anyone else's).

It's weird how I have a totally different feeling about my kid. I can't understand how my parents could have hit us. It breaks my heart to see Marlow sad and to know I did it would crush me.
post #1667 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow's mom View Post
hmmmmm.... you aren't really admitting to anything. hmmmmmm a mystery.
It depends on what the definition of "is" is!
post #1668 of 1860
post #1669 of 1860
They are all so cute...she is sitting up so well. She loved that puppet!!

Congrats...503!!
post #1670 of 1860
[QUOTE=mommy2girlies;6843116]
We had the same audiovisual problems. First we get to my moms and see that our Camcorder memory is full and we don't have the cable to upload the movies. Then just a few minutes into Christmas Eve morning (I've always done Christmas Eve Morning w/ my mom since my parents were divorced) opening presents, our camera battery poops out and lo and behold we forgot the what? say it with me, CHARGER!! We also forgot our smaller, sometimes working digital camera. So later when my stepdad was going out to get a few things at the store, we wanted him to get us some disposable cameras. When we arrive at my inlaws house that night, I find the camera we thought we left at home, but its chosen not to work. So long story long, dh's dad gives us his old camera (very nice digital, better quality than our sometime working one) and its my fav gift and its wasn't even a christmas gift!!:

We had a problem too. DH forgot the memory card. AGAIN. He also forgot it on... the day P was born, the first time we went to the beach, and Thanksgiving. So, we have THREE of them now, and he STILL forgets them!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow's mom View Post
We went up north to the IL's for Christmas. I was a bit bored and crabby. Lee's mom was the usual passive aggressive and spoke to my DD when she was "angry" with me like, "your mommy sure doesn't help out much", or "your mommy should let you cry it out a little". sigh.

She got a bunch of toys. All plastic, some with scary loud sounds and some she already got from my mom. She got a phone that sounds like the "b" word when you push 6 and sounds like "wh*re" when you push 4...it's delightful.

She also got the snap beads a few of you have mentioned.

We got her one gift. We got it FFS on the TP in like August. It's a hippo that eats blocks that have vegetables in it. She's a bit young so I just have it stored in her room. She never uses her room. it's a big void right now.

We asked the IL's if maybe next year they could stick to one gift for Mars. I saw how horrible my 6 year old niece was about her gifts and I really don't want my kid to be so ummm..bratty. She says things like "that's all I got", and "I didn't ask for this, can we go get what I wanted?". Maybe I am remembering things wrong but isn't 6 old enough to know better?

And isn't 3 old enough to not chew up a bunch of creamed corn and run over and empty your mouth on Aunt Lindsey? I said ew, gross don't do that. and Lee's mom said "he's only 3, you can't expect him to know better". Is she right?

arrgg! and she (my mil) keeps saying how spoiled Mars is. I asked her why she wants to spoil the older kids but be rough with the babies. It makes no sense to me. She wants Mars to lay on the floor crying but kids 1 yr old and over can do whatever they want. Screwy.

Sorry this turned into a rant.

My family's x-mas is this coming Saturday. We only buy for the kids and my mom on my side.

I have to work today and tomorrow. I am thinking about calling in tomorrow to give Lee a day off as a "christmas gift". Being a SAHD, I know he has a harder job than me.
about the nursing, but I hope you're really proud of yourself for pumping!
As for the passive aggressive MIL stuff, I kind of do that to DH : but usually it's more in a joking mood, like the oh-so-intelligent "Daddy sucks." or "Daddy's crazy, don't mind him." I suppose I should knock it off, because P will be too young for a while to get the joke.
I also talk as if I'm P, like "Daddy, daddy, change my diaper!"
Another :

Ugh to the 6yr old story. I don't know if it's too young for manners. My DH still sometimes does that, he goes "oh." But just with his parents. I think that it's fair to expect more than that rudeness. Now what i"m trying to work with my 10 yr old SS on is that talking about how much your gifts cost is also bad manners!

As for spoiling Marlow... ugh.
post #1671 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow's mom View Post
HI! HEY!!! I got a DDDDC!!!!!!! Who gave it to me???????? I'm so excited!

Forgive any typos...I'm pumping while typing because Mars still hates to nurse

I got cards from Ange and Korin! Such cuties!!!

We went up north to the IL's for Christmas. I was a bit bored and crabby. Lee's mom was the usual passive aggressive and spoke to my DD when she was "angry" with me like, "your mommy sure doesn't help out much", or "your mommy should let you cry it out a little". sigh.
Charming. :

Quote:
We asked the IL's if maybe next year they could stick to one gift for Mars. I saw how horrible my 6 year old niece was about her gifts and I really don't want my kid to be so ummm..bratty. She says things like "that's all I got", and "I didn't ask for this, can we go get what I wanted?". Maybe I am remembering things wrong but isn't 6 old enough to know better?

And isn't 3 old enough to not chew up a bunch of creamed corn and run over and empty your mouth on Aunt Lindsey? I said ew, gross don't do that. and Lee's mom said "he's only 3, you can't expect him to know better". Is she right?
Last year, Victoria was on the cusp of 6, and it was awful. The ONLY gift that got a remotely positive reaction was cash. Seriously. Anything else was "i already have this one." Or, the one that got her sent to her room for the rest of Christmas day, was when Sydney opened her Santa present (she'd asked for a Cinderella dress) and was giggling before she got the box the whole way open, because she saw the glittery sleeves, and Victoria said, "*ugh* She already GOT that at D Mommy's house. What's wrong with Santa?" At which point Sydney's whole little face crumbled and she got very, very quiet and gently laid the dress down, thinking Santa didn't love her or something, based solely on what her sister had said. So yeah, this is normal 6 year old behavior, unfortunately. Of course, this year Vic was still 6, so maybe that explains the crappy feelings I was left with?

Oh, and 3...tough call. Our girls have never acted out like normal toddlers, so I don't have much in the way of points of reference, but it sounds like either A)the kid is craving attention, or B)desperately wants someone to just tell him "no." Wishy washy discipline gets old, even for kids.

Quote:
arrgg! and she (my mil) keeps saying how spoiled Mars is. I asked her why she wants to spoil the older kids but be rough with the babies. It makes no sense to me. She wants Mars to lay on the floor crying but kids 1 yr old and over can do whatever they want. Screwy.
Very screwy. Not sure of the logic on that one.
post #1672 of 1860
Also, DH and I are having parenting arguments. Some of it is silly, like he suggests I rock P in P's bouncy chair when I prefer to hold him and rock him in my own chair. I tell him we'll do things differently than each other, and he says it doesn't make sense to raise one kid two different ways. ? :

But there are things that bug me. Last night P was a little fussy before going to sleep, and DH said just leave him on the bed for a few minutes by himself. What?? I told him that was CIO and it was harmful. He said, not if you're in the same room.

He's starting to think P is a little spoiled I believe. I need to nip this in the bud because it is totally unacceptable as far as I'm concerned.

But to be fair, DH is very attentive, and these sorts of comments are rare. I also think we both have complexes. He takes care of P all day and wants to be listened to because he feels he knows what he's doing. I want to be left to be the mother, because I probably feel like less of one since I"m at work all day, and I want to know *something* more than DH.

Ugh. Ok, off to work.
post #1673 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow's mom View Post
Forgive any typos...I'm pumping while typing because Mars still hates to nurse


We went up north to the IL's for Christmas. I was a bit bored and crabby. Lee's mom was the usual passive aggressive and spoke to my DD when she was "angry" with me like, "your mommy sure doesn't help out much", or "your mommy should let you cry it out a little". sigh.

She got a bunch of toys. All plastic, some with scary loud sounds and some she already got from my mom. She got a phone that sounds like the "b" word when you push 6 and sounds like "wh*re" when you push 4...it's delightful.

She also got the snap beads a few of you have mentioned.
arrgg! and she (my mil) keeps saying how spoiled Mars is. I asked her why she wants to spoil the older kids but be rough with the babies. It makes no sense to me. She wants Mars to lay on the floor crying but kids 1 yr old and over can do whatever they want. Screwy.

Sorry this turned into a rant.
No need to apologize. Rant away. My thoughts...
1. You rock for continuing to pump. You ARE ONE TOUGH MOTHER
2. Your MIL is a lunatic. Let the older kids run wild and CIO a baby? bleh. ignore her, you are an amazing mother.
3. the pix are awesome. Marlow is so cute.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Selesai View Post
Also, DH and I are having parenting arguments. Some of it is silly, like he suggests I rock P in P's bouncy chair when I prefer to hold him and rock him in my own chair. I tell him we'll do things differently than each other, and he says it doesn't make sense to raise one kid two different ways. ? :

But there are things that bug me. Last night P was a little fussy before going to sleep, and DH said just leave him on the bed for a few minutes by himself. What?? I told him that was CIO and it was harmful. He said, not if you're in the same room.

He's starting to think P is a little spoiled I believe. I need to nip this in the bud because it is totally unacceptable as far as I'm concerned.

But to be fair, DH is very attentive, and these sorts of comments are rare. I also think we both have complexes. He takes care of P all day and wants to be listened to because he feels he knows what he's doing. I want to be left to be the mother, because I probably feel like less of one since I"m at work all day, and I want to know *something* more than DH.

Ugh. Ok, off to work.
As far as fussing... is he fussing to get comfortable, or calling for attention? sometimes Ruby will wake up, while we're downstairs, and I'll listen to the monitor for a bit to see if she needs me or if she just wants to moan a bit and fall back to sleep. it's 50/50. it's more like seeing if she is self soothing, or not.
post #1674 of 1860
You guys are wonderful! Thank you all for boosting my spirits and letting me whine!
post #1675 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Caroline248 View Post
THought that might show how amazing these sickly babies really are...
BEAUTIFUL!

Quote:
Originally Posted by mommitola View Post
One outfit I have to figure out how to return. I may list it as FFS on the TP if I can't return it, although I bet no one will want it. It's a pink sleeveless "silky" polyester cami, a pink acrylic cardigan, pink cords with sequins on the flared bottoms :
Ummmm...wow.

Quote:
Originally Posted by katiejon1 View Post
Anyway, here is a picture of her in her Christmas dress. I can't believe how big she's gotten. She's definitely crawling everywhere and I've even caught her trying to climb up on her feet. She ends up looking like a triangle.
http://www.dropshots.com/photos/1773...0_b_131730.jpg

This is a picture of her and Caleb sitting under the tree. He had a good Christmas too and is still playing with everything. His favorite was his light saber sword. My dad found one for him too, so he got two. It actually worked out well b/c now he has someone to clash with.
http://www.dropshots.com/photos/1773...0_b_203850.jpg
LOVE these 2 shots!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by chiromama View Post
"Santa" brought Ruby a sweet potato. She gagged and then barfed on herself. Got it on video. Nice. Really nice. I may try avocado when the ones we bought this morning are ripe.. but I dont' think she's ready. She shows all the signs, but still I don't think she's ready.
Aw, poor Ruby....though K didn't like sweet potatoes either, but loves avocados....so who knows?


Quote:
Originally Posted by Caroline248 View Post
Oh, Sarah..my SIL and I hid in the laundry room and ate the rest of the sin sticks.
: You are my kind of ladies!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by papayapetunia View Post
Big sigh. Sarah, I'm right there with you. I don't want to go into details, but this was a very hard Christmas for me. Next year will be better.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Amys1st View Post
BTW- has anyone noticed their nursling not nursing as much this past week or so?
Thank goodness, no.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sehbub View Post
Luckily, we just found out tonight that B won about $300 in his office league for Fantasy Football, so now we "only" have to pay about $200 out of pocket to get my car fixed. :


Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddington View Post
Just had a visit from some high school friends and yup, we have absolutely nothing in common anymore. :
- I'm feeling parenting differences starting now that my IRL friends' babies are all getting older (6 of us had our first babies within about a 2-year time span)...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow's mom View Post
Forgive any typos...I'm pumping while typing because Mars still hates to nurse


Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow's mom View Post
We went up north to the IL's for Christmas. I was a bit bored and crabby. Lee's mom was the usual passive aggressive and spoke to my DD when she was "angry" with me like, "your mommy sure doesn't help out much", or "your mommy should let you cry it out a little". sigh.
Lovely.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow'sMom
We got her one gift. We got it FFS on the TP in like August. It's a hippo that eats blocks that have vegetables in it.
Hey, DS had that when he was starting to walk, and LOVED it - he'd push his stuffed animals all around in it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow'sMom
We asked the IL's if maybe next year they could stick to one gift for Mars. I saw how horrible my 6 year old niece was about her gifts and I really don't want my kid to be so ummm..bratty. She says things like "that's all I got", and "I didn't ask for this, can we go get what I wanted?". Maybe I am remembering things wrong but isn't 6 old enough to know better?

And isn't 3 old enough to not chew up a bunch of creamed corn and run over and empty your mouth on Aunt Lindsey? I said ew, gross don't do that. and Lee's mom said "he's only 3, you can't expect him to know better". Is she right?
Ooh, these are tough. While I think both can be totally normal and age appropriate, I also think that they are also things that need parental intervention to teach and guide the child as to how their actions and words can affect others.
Lindsey, those pics of Marlow are too cute!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Selesai View Post
Also, DH and I are having parenting arguments. Some of it is silly, like he suggests I rock P in P's bouncy chair when I prefer to hold him and rock him in my own chair. I tell him we'll do things differently than each other, and he says it doesn't make sense to raise one kid two different ways. ? :

But there are things that bug me. Last night P was a little fussy before going to sleep, and DH said just leave him on the bed for a few minutes by himself. What?? I told him that was CIO and it was harmful. He said, not if you're in the same room.

He's starting to think P is a little spoiled I believe. I need to nip this in the bud because it is totally unacceptable as far as I'm concerned.

But to be fair, DH is very attentive, and these sorts of comments are rare. I also think we both have complexes. He takes care of P all day and wants to be listened to because he feels he knows what he's doing. I want to be left to be the mother, because I probably feel like less of one since I"m at work all day, and I want to know *something* more than DH.

Ugh. Ok, off to work.
, mama. This is tough. I think the bouncer vs rocker isn't part of "raising" your child, just doing things differently, like I'm sure you don't both brush your teeth the exact same way, you're going to soothe him different ways, so maybe you could approach DH that way, that it's the same philosophy (soothing), different technique type of thing. The CIO issue I would definitely put my foot down on, no way, no how would that happen...there's a difference between needing to take a few minutes to pee, or to regain your composure if you're burnt out, and leaving a baby to cry to "teach" them something....but I'm preaching to the choir, I know. I know there's a difference between fussing and crying, but you can easily tell when one is ramping up, and one is ramping down. As far as spoiling, it's literally impossible to spoil a baby. As to nipping it in the bud, if I may be so presumptuous, if your DH would read a book he might like Anthony Wolf's "The Secret to Parenting" (I know, cheesy title) - it's a great read for more authoritative parents into how and why gentle discipline works, and gives easy to remember anectdotes to how to handle various situations. I'd also maybe suggest getting him some developmental information so he knows what is appropriate and what's not at various stages in early childhood (Bates and Ames put out a decent "Your X-year-old" series, and the website Zero to Three is also good)- though I do think it's a 2-fold issue; knowing what is appropriate behavior (since too-high expectations can lead to lots of struggles), and knowing how to redirect behaviors when they're developmentally appropriate, but not socially appropriate (i.e., the creamed corn issue Lindsey brought up above). OK, I'll step down off my soapbox now. Gentle discipline is my HUGE soapbox issue, as I believe it's the single most important issue in childrearing past babyhood.....:

In other news, my kaitylady woke up at 6am, and then slept only 18 minutes between then and 12:30pm Poor girl, those upper teeth must be really bugging her. Let's hope she's down for a couple hours now.

Will try to get some pics posted today of our holidays. Take care, everyone!! Big hugs all around, we seem to be having a pretty stressful last couple weeks of 2006, as a group
post #1676 of 1860
I dont think you're whining because you're one tough mother


As far as the bratty kids- I dont understand how its ok for boys to be boys but if an infant is crying, we need to let them scream their hearts out. Its not just your MIL but plenty of people so dont feel like your whining.

I do remember as a child getting out of sorts after too much holiday which is what it sounds like for the 6 yr old and 3 yr old. Heck I am out of sorts with this holiday and I am 35!
When you think of it, if they are visiting relatives, times it times 50 but they are off their schedule, people are around them that are not normally around that much, there is lots of food they usually dont eat or dont want, sweets, present overload and expectations from the givers. Its a lot! This is why I insist that my parents give their gifts over a few days time- rather weeks but never happens.

So now that we have done the ILs in, who here likes their ILs more than their parents?? My parents have officailly drove me crazy this entire year and I now would choose to be with the ILs over them.
post #1677 of 1860
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amys1st View Post
So now that we have done the ILs in, who here likes their ILs more than their parents?? My parents have officailly drove me crazy this entire year and I now would choose to be with the ILs over them.
I love my parents and my inlaws, though they are vastly different couples...and dislike them all for other reasons, too!
post #1678 of 1860
I get along with my parents better than I do my inlaws. At least now I do. I used to think my MIL was the greatest thing since sliced bread until B and I got married and she turned mean. Very two-faced, talks about me behind my back, etc. Just not a very nice person.
post #1679 of 1860
OK, some pictures of DD and DS (cause they're both super cute, as far as I'm concerned : )

Santa shot DD looks to me to be thinking: "OK, who the !&^@ is this guy holding me, and mom, why are you standing way over there?"

DD's "fancy" picture

DS rolling cookies

DS sprinkling cookies

DD hanging out while DS sprinkles cookies

DD her first Christmas Morning

I swear we didn't pose this! Hat malfunction

DS opening stocking stuffers - He had NO interest in opening his regular presents, but was SO excited to open stocking stuffers

Let's see some more pictures from everyone else!
post #1680 of 1860
*le sigh* my fil isnt so bad but thsn again he lives about 9 hours away. even if he was closer he wouldnt be as bad as my MIL, who always talks crap about her ex (fil). My Mil has MS, among her other laundry list of deseases. She is a chain smoker and drinker and an all around cantankerious woman. I could feel sorry for her about the MS if she wouldnt use it as a crutch to get pain pills and pitty. She discust me on so many levels. The lies the deceite the absolute disreguard for anyone else but her. She goes to church, to a pretty ridiged church, and follows none of the 'rules' and bad mouths everyone there because they dont cater to her. she is rude, has no manners, is obnoxiouslly loud. she opitimises white trash, compleate with her dog she makes out with and buys steak for the complaines she has no money, fo whict she comes to us to solve. her house is always a wreck, smells like a rotten ashtray and covered in dog hair. She will spill on the floor wait a week than tell us so we can come clean it up. I cant stand it. I feel so bad for dh because honestlly my mom is really cool and she is my bestfriend. She has had her times and is currently a recovering addict, and I have lived in a speed freaks house for several years and so I am use to the crazyness, but I am an adult now and I dont have to put up with it.

Mil always wants us to bring ds over and I find excuses not to, dh dosent force the issue he dosen want ds over there eather. But there are times when he has to be around his g-ma and well he's okay if she keeps her distance but will freak out if she tries to hold him or pokes at him too much. Its really sad when a woman who has contracted MS in her early 20's (is still alive at almost 50), beat cancer twice, and excaped abusive relationships chooses to let cigeretts and booze killer her. Crap just this year she has been diganosed with both congestive heart failure and Chrons Desease and probably wouldn have it if she would take care of herself. But the irony of it all is she will live for a very long time and try to drag us all down with her.


Okay sorry you asked the question....its a bit of a sore spot with me if you couldnt tell, that money grubbing, dirty frekasnaka *grumble grumble* &*%$#
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