This is a letter to my dd that I wrote one night before my ds was born...
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Will you ever know?
Carly—will you ever know how much you mean to me? I’m not sure you will. No matter what you do, where you go, the choices you make—none of it matters—I will love you forever and a day and NOTHING will change my unconditional love for you. The love a mother feels for her child—the one who grew secretly and safely in her womb for 9 months—is indescribable. I would die for you.
Carly—will you ever doubt your worth? Please don’t. I look at you next to me right now sleeping. You are so serene and beautiful. I know there will be people in your life willing to love you and then throw you away. They may hurt you, but never doubt yourself or judge yourself based on their actions. You are only four right now, and I know you think I can’t ‘see’ this far into the future…but I SEE you. I know your soul. I can see so much promise, happiness, and wonderful things in your future. I hope you believe in yourself. I believe in you.
Carly—will you ever see all the doors open to you? I’m one for positive thinking. I hope you find that thinking positive is the ‘way to go’ in this life. I hope you can recognize that even if one door closes, another will open—and that may be the ‘right way’ for you. You are a smart little girl who reads people well. I have no doubts that you will find success in your life. I have faith in you.
Carly—can you see me? Can you finally see that all of my actions are out of my love for you? Do you know that I would never purposely hurt you? Once you have children of your own I hope you can see the overpowering love that fiercely burrows into your heart—so much that there is NO WAY they could do anything to change it. Every step I take, I consider you. Every road in life I choose, I choose with knowledge of how it affects you. Every action is made only after carefully weighing how it may change your life.
As we both lay here in the days before your brother or sister is born, I can’t help thinking of how this choice, this action, may affect you. Will you be thankful for having this sibling? You are so excited about him/her right now. This child is a gift to you. One day when Daddy and I are gone, you will still have this brother or sister as your family. If I am honest with you, I will say that I am worried that I won’t be able to spend as much one on one time with you. My dear girl, I love you so much and I don’t want to spend less time with you. But I also know that you will enjoy this baby as I will, and that once he/she is here we won’t be able to even remember life without him/her in our family. Just as I look back on our life without you—Daddy and I were so incomplete and we didn’t even know it! We are so thankful to have you, my dear, sweet Carly!
My heart is so full of you. You are my heart. Nothing will change that. This new baby will only increase the size of my heart, not lessen the space for you. I love you intensely. Never, never, never forget that, my sweet, sweet, child.
Love Always,
Momma
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Will you ever know?
Carly—will you ever know how much you mean to me? I’m not sure you will. No matter what you do, where you go, the choices you make—none of it matters—I will love you forever and a day and NOTHING will change my unconditional love for you. The love a mother feels for her child—the one who grew secretly and safely in her womb for 9 months—is indescribable. I would die for you.
Carly—will you ever doubt your worth? Please don’t. I look at you next to me right now sleeping. You are so serene and beautiful. I know there will be people in your life willing to love you and then throw you away. They may hurt you, but never doubt yourself or judge yourself based on their actions. You are only four right now, and I know you think I can’t ‘see’ this far into the future…but I SEE you. I know your soul. I can see so much promise, happiness, and wonderful things in your future. I hope you believe in yourself. I believe in you.
Carly—will you ever see all the doors open to you? I’m one for positive thinking. I hope you find that thinking positive is the ‘way to go’ in this life. I hope you can recognize that even if one door closes, another will open—and that may be the ‘right way’ for you. You are a smart little girl who reads people well. I have no doubts that you will find success in your life. I have faith in you.
Carly—can you see me? Can you finally see that all of my actions are out of my love for you? Do you know that I would never purposely hurt you? Once you have children of your own I hope you can see the overpowering love that fiercely burrows into your heart—so much that there is NO WAY they could do anything to change it. Every step I take, I consider you. Every road in life I choose, I choose with knowledge of how it affects you. Every action is made only after carefully weighing how it may change your life.
As we both lay here in the days before your brother or sister is born, I can’t help thinking of how this choice, this action, may affect you. Will you be thankful for having this sibling? You are so excited about him/her right now. This child is a gift to you. One day when Daddy and I are gone, you will still have this brother or sister as your family. If I am honest with you, I will say that I am worried that I won’t be able to spend as much one on one time with you. My dear girl, I love you so much and I don’t want to spend less time with you. But I also know that you will enjoy this baby as I will, and that once he/she is here we won’t be able to even remember life without him/her in our family. Just as I look back on our life without you—Daddy and I were so incomplete and we didn’t even know it! We are so thankful to have you, my dear, sweet Carly!
My heart is so full of you. You are my heart. Nothing will change that. This new baby will only increase the size of my heart, not lessen the space for you. I love you intensely. Never, never, never forget that, my sweet, sweet, child.
Love Always,
Momma
