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You Know You're the Parent of a Toddler When... - Page 40

post #781 of 940
8/12/08 at 10:47am
You stop at a fast food drive-through and decide against getting fries, and when your child hears the bag open up, he starts yelling "Bee! Bee!" (Translation: Please! Please!) from his car seat, and gets mad when he thinks you're holding out on him even though you try to explain that you didn't get any fries. That's when you realize maybe you eat fast food more often than you should.

Oh, and you frequently hear your husband saying "No, buddy, you have your own to play with. Leave daddy's alone."

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post #782 of 940
8/12/08 at 11:00am
Quote:
Originally Posted by angel1895 View Post
bumpity bump...

they should make this thread a sticky
What does bump mean?!
post #783 of 940
8/12/08 at 11:41am
Quote:
Originally Posted by alisaterry View Post
When you find undigested popcorn kernals at the bottom of your washer after doing a diaper load.
- corn. ew ew ew ew ew ew ew
post #784 of 940
8/12/08 at 11:52am
Quote:
Originally Posted by orlandoivfrn View Post
Ok, I just remembered this one:

When you notice out of the corner of your eye that your 18 month old is quietly chewing on something with her mouth closed. You suddenly realize you gave her NOTHING to eat recently and race over. Fearing the worst (razor blade, etc) you pry her mouth open and find a strange green substance coating her tongue, the outside of her lips and actually wedged in between her teeth.

It dawns on you that she has managed to scrape a piece of bird poop off the patio and is having a snack with it.:Puke

After you vomit, scream and vomit some more you manage to clean it out best you can. You then actually contemplate pouring bleach in her mouth. Knowing you can do no such thing, you call the pediatrician and it takes them 20 minutes to convince you she will NOT get Avian Bird Flu from the tasty morsel.

The worst thing is that I think she was actually enjoying it.

I am still watching for symptoms of Avian Flu 1 1/2 years later.


Michelle
I just laughed so hard that snot came out of my nose.
post #785 of 940
8/12/08 at 12:26pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sothisislove View Post
What does bump mean?!
That no one had posted in a while so the thread had disappeared from the first page or two of the forum and now someone is "bumping" it back up to the top so people will see it and post.
post #786 of 940
8/12/08 at 4:42pm
I love, love, love this thread. But now I'm caught up and have to wait for each post . My DS just started walking so I don't have any posts yet, but I'm sure I will soon. I do have to add that after reading all these pages I've realized I've made a serious error. I have been calling nursing "having tittie". I have a feeling I better break that habit before he starts talking or I'm going to be embarassed in a public place for sure .
post #787 of 940
8/12/08 at 6:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by deadheadmomma View Post
I love, love, love this thread. But now I'm caught up and have to wait for each post . My DS just started walking so I don't have any posts yet, but I'm sure I will soon. I do have to add that after reading all these pages I've realized I've made a serious error. I have been calling nursing "having tittie". I have a feeling I better break that habit before he starts talking or I'm going to be embarassed in a public place for sure .
I hadn't realized that everytime my ds wanted to nurse and my dh was around and was holding him that he was saying "he wants the boob." So my ds started saying "b" everytime he wanted to nurse and put two and two together that he was probably going to start saying boob for nurse soon. So I had to have my dh stop calling it that right away and now he call it "nums." I was always calling it nums, but he was really into saying b words at the time. So, you do have time to change it to something else before its permanent.
post #788 of 940
8/12/08 at 10:24pm
You're lying in bed next to your lo. It is her bed time. She crawls over closer to you and lays her head on top of yours. She opens her mouth and begins her sleepy-girl moaning. There is drool (not yours) sliding down your cheek and dripping off your chin. You don't dare move because maybe, just maybe, this is THE thing that will help her fall asleep more quickly. (It isn't the thing.)
post #789 of 940
8/12/08 at 11:52pm
You're exhausted by 9:30 a.m. - and that's of course the day she'll decide to resist naptime as if it's the worst torture ever.
post #790 of 940
8/13/08 at 12:11am
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnygir1 View Post
You're lying in bed next to your lo. It is her bed time. She crawls over closer to you and lays her head on top of yours. She opens her mouth and begins her sleepy-girl moaning. There is drool (not yours) sliding down your cheek and dripping off your chin. You don't dare move because maybe, just maybe, this is THE thing that will help her fall asleep more quickly. (It isn't the thing.)
Oh jeez--that's a good one. I've sat through all MANNER of things just hoping and praying that it was THE thing, and that she was ALMOST asleep (they usually weren't).
post #791 of 940
8/13/08 at 12:13am
Quote:
Originally Posted by MilkTrance View Post
you make the sign for "thank you" whenever you thank somebody
I totally do this, it's kind of embarrassing! I've done it across a crowded room (where nobody can hear me) to friends who don't have a clue about sign...what do they think I'm doing? Blowing them a kiss? I never remember to ask...
post #792 of 940
8/13/08 at 12:14am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Otterella View Post
You stop at a fast food drive-through and decide against getting fries, and when your child hears the bag open up, he starts yelling "Bee! Bee!" (Translation: Please! Please!) from his car seat, and gets mad when he thinks you're holding out on him even though you try to explain that you didn't get any fries. That's when you realize maybe you eat fast food more often than you should.
Oh, man! I don't feel like we eat potato chips very often, but when she hears that bag she is all "mama," and reaching, and signing please! They learn certain things very quickly.
post #793 of 940
8/13/08 at 12:40am
you get upset when DH breaks the one piece of 'the routine' that helps DS to go to sleep at night or at nap time... because this will be the time that you can go to sleep, bc you are sooo exhausted today.

Okay, maybe this is just a sign or Today, bc DH actually let DS take a nap at close to 6 PM, and his bedtime is 8:30ish/9:30ish, and he wouldn't go to sleep until almost 11:30 tonight.
post #794 of 940
8/13/08 at 1:15am
You freeze and give family members the evil eye every time you hear them say certain 'trigger' words like "blueberries" or "blanket" or "park". Why in god's name can't they remember to s-p-e-l-l them out?
post #795 of 940
8/13/08 at 1:16am
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnygir1 View Post
You're lying in bed next to your lo. It is her bed time. She crawls over closer to you and lays her head on top of yours. She opens her mouth and begins her sleepy-girl moaning. There is drool (not yours) sliding down your cheek and dripping off your chin. You don't dare move because maybe, just maybe, this is THE thing that will help her fall asleep more quickly. (It isn't the thing.)
This made me laugh so hard I woke up DD in the next room.
post #796 of 940
8/13/08 at 5:01am
Quote:
Originally Posted by cheygirl View Post
You freeze and give family members the evil eye every time you hear them say certain 'trigger' words like "blueberries" or "blanket" or "park". Why in god's name can't they remember to s-p-e-l-l them out?
HAHAHAHA. We don't spell them but pronounce words backwards or switch syllables :-) So if we'd speak about (not) going to the park we say 'krap', or 'greyplound', 'banana' will be 'ananab' and so on . Sometimes Dh gives me weird looks if again he really doesn't get what I'm saying. I'm better at it than him . We also have 3 languages going on at home, which canmmake it more confusing when speaking backwards. Sometimes he forgets and right after my effort uses the 'trigger word and we're back where it began...
post #797 of 940
8/13/08 at 10:09pm
When your DS suddenly decides to stand up and dance on the bed but instantly loses his footing and starts plummeting off the bed. Fear not! You catch his head in the palm of your hand one inch above the hardwood floor, there is a pause and then he smiles up at you.

When you take pictures of trucks at a rest stop because there happens to be 3 parked in a row and each one is a primary color... and you think Roger Priddy could totally use your photo in one of his books!
post #798 of 940
8/13/08 at 10:42pm
:
Quote:
Originally Posted by mchalehm View Post
You lean over and a Cheerio falls out of your bra, so you eat it.
post #799 of 940
8/13/08 at 10:47pm
when you wake up to see your naked toddler coloring on a book with a chunk of her own poop and say "at least it's not diarrhea."
post #800 of 940
8/13/08 at 10:51pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MilkTrance View Post
You say the word "penis" a lot. "Yes, that's your penis," "DON'T grab your penis, you are poopy!" and "That's Daddy's penis. We don't grab Daddy's penis"

"daddy's penis is not a towel holder." "yes, that's brother's penis. it's not a toy. please don't poke baby brother in the scrotum."
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Sitting or Squatting: What's Really Best in the Bathroom?
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Mothering › Mothering Discussion Forums › Parenting › Ages and Stages › Toddlers › You Know You're the Parent of a Toddler When...