Any ideas on how to handle my 5 year old.

[~FlyLady~]

My DS 5, has gotten into the nasty habit of telling people very rude things, last week we had lunch with a school friend ( my old highschool friend) and he said to her you need to lose some weight, its not just this occurrence its other things, for example he said to another woman why have you no teeth. I am getting to the stage where I am scared to take him out as he is just plain rude, I warn him well before we go out not to say anything rude as it hurts peoples feelings but it does not work. I just am at a wits end, I am scared when he opens his mouth. Any ideas?

[LynnS6]

Does he know what rude is? He mght understand that some things aren't polite, but does he know specifically than in our culture we do not talk about

-people's appearance (weight, height, teeth (or lack thereof))
-people's smell
-what people are wearing

gosh.. I"m sure there are other rules, I'm just too tired to come up with them. I guess I would be MUCH more specific to him about what's OK. In addition, give him some topics that he CAN talk about - weather, sports, that sort of thing.

Most 5 year olds I know wouldn't necessarily consider this rude. They are, alas, just stating the obvious that we adults have learned to suppress!

[OakBerry]

I have taught my ds not to comment on people's appearance, but if he is curious about something , he can whisper or quietly ask ME about the person and I will discuss it with him briefly at the moment, and in depth later on.

I started doing this after he saw a man with a prosthetic leg and yelled "look mom, what's wrong with his leg, it's a robot leg"! Thankfully, the man did not hear him.

[*jeanine*]

My ds, 5 1/2, is doing this too. Mostly he tells people they're fat. I try and explain to him why he shouldn't say that (like it might make them sad, they probably already know, etc). It's embarassing, but I think age-appropriate.