There's something wrong with me. - Page 3

[Vixenmama]

Originally Posted by kamilla626

..."I could get a few bucks for this someday!" ...

I keep thinking about the OP's saving things to sell and now you mention it again.

Maybe with things to sell: Decide you have room for x things to sell, say 10, or however many will fit in a rubbermaid container. Make a rule that you are only allowed to have that many things, everything else has to go.

Think about all that stuff as freeloaders, taking up very real, physical space in your life and paying no rent at all.

If something is going to get you 10 or 20 bucks on Ebay---is it even really worth your time, energy, organizing skill, storage space, peace of mind (dealing with the clutter until it's sold).

You think you can "make a few bucks", but really all that stuff is costing you a lot in peace and life energy while it waits to get sold.

[oneKnight]

Originally Posted by muse

But aside from that i wanted to say, for me, sometimes chaos and mess makes me feel totally overwhelmed, depressed, angry, etc...and other times it feels cosy and homey. It totally depends on other stuff going on in my life. Likewise on good days I have no problem tackling the chaos, but on days when other stuff in my life is overwhelming the mess just knocks me over completely.

I totally agree there! Some days I cannot stand the clutter, it feels like I can't move around in my house! (It's really not that bad, but that's what it feels like) But after going in someone else's "perfectly manicured, professionally-decorated" house or office they just seem so unnatural and un-lived-in, makes my clutter feel homey. I guess it's all about how you're looking at it and feeling at the moment.

[ericswifey27]

Another fellow "I could have written that post" person here...
Subbing to commisserate with oceanbaby and listen to some of the organizing tips too

I save everything. I have a hard time letting go of anything. I never know if I might need it... you know how that is I am sure.

It took a lot of effort to get some fs threads up. I can't believe how much stuff is in my house that I am not even using right now. I am planning a homebirth and need to get my house clean by early June...

[kamesennin]

.

[LookMommy!]

Passover.

That word frightens Jews like me (traditional/observant) because it entails cleaning the entire house top to bottom looking for traces of leaven (bread, crumbs, etc.). Every toy box, every drawer, every corner. All dishes and kitchen items are boxed up and stored for the week, and the kosher for Passover set is used. Every surface is wiped, even each book is shaken. It is a housewife's nightmare starting the day after Purim (about a month beforehand). Of course, after the house is clean I have to cook a feast for all the relatives, without using any bread, crackers, pasta, legumes, rice, etc.

It is so much easier for me to throw it away than clean it! I am constantly searching for things to toss! Also, we rent out our apt. every summer for a month, and need to give the rentors space to put their stuff. It is so cathartic to purge all that stuff!

I have a neighbor with 3 little boys who I give all my stuff to. Her house is a disaster, but mine is clean and neat. If I ever need something back, I can ask, but I almost never do. I never buy anything if I can borrow it from her. She has 85 different shapes of cookie cutters! We love to bless our friends with old childrens clothes, and enjoy seeing them wear them.

I just brought down two small cartons of Hannukah things. I am hoping at the end of the week to only have to put one away. Holiday music and books we no longer like, decorations that have had their day, anything chipped or dented -- it can go!

My kids have memory boxes under their beds. DD13 has 3 so far, Ds10 has 2, dd6 has 1. That is more than enough stuff to follow them through life. My mom saved everything, but in no particular box, so it isn't anything you can spend a rainy afternoon looking at and then be done. It's more hit or miss, and it is a chore.

Good luck!

Lisa

[mommaof3boz]

What about painting the walls in your house?

Now that sounds WAY off topic correct? Well here is my thoughts on that. When you get ready to paint your walls think of how much stuff you have to get out of the way. You have to take everything down off the walls and push the furniture to the middle of the room. SO if you planned to paint your house you would seriously have to get rid of lots of stuff to be able to paint. Maybe if you also knew you were getting pretty new paint it would seem like a fresh start?

1. Rent the dumpster.

2. Kids and dh out of the house. Could you send them to a hotel for one weekend?
3. Trash bags and lots of them.
4. A good friend or two.
5. Sign at end of driveway stating "free" haul everything large down there.
6. Wine and snacks
7. Music
8. Roll up your sleeves and just DO IT

[pixie-n-hertwoboys]

oy this is me. To the nth degree.

: : hey did everyone know there were two note taking smiles? LOL

Reading this actually makes me : but will save it for later HAHAHAH j/k see, I save everything in my favorites too. I save the pottery barn catalogs because I like something in there for dh to make or the color schemes.... its sad. I'll get after dh because he puts crap on top the fridge - but then I'll stack stuff on the lower flat surfaces just as bad.

Recently I just did a purge of junk and had a yard sale... and also put in stuff from the previous yard sales that I kept. this time whatever didn't sell it went to goodwill no matter if I think it was worth money or not.

I honestly have no idea how we accumulate so much junk. I don't like to shop, neither does dh. Yet I have the spare room thrown full of stuff. I close the door to that room so I don't have to deal with it.

off to re-read the whole thing and get motivated!

[oceanbaby]

This has really been a great thread. Please, keep it coming! It helps to know that I'm not the only one!

I only have a few seconds to reply before the kids come barging in . . .

Oh yeah, got a garage full of goodwill bags. Well, of course they first sit in my hallway for a couple of weeks or until we have company over, then it gets transferred to the garage. But it rarely makes it out of the house. That sounds like a good project for this weekend - pile up the car with the goodwill bags in the garage send dh off with it.

There is one room that is by far the worst, and I'm sitting in it right now: The playroom/office/changing table/kids' dresser room. The toys, the cloth diapers, the clothes clothes clothes!

Leta - your post was insipired. The part about doing laundry more often so you need less. Duh! I mean, geez, I can graduate from honors from a top university but I can't figure out that maybe ds2 doesn't need more new pants, but more clean pants!

Ack, now I gotta run. Back later.

[laketahoemama]

Oceanbaby I cried because I feel your pain so wholeheartedly! People joke, but it really is a miserable thing feeling trapped in a mess. I have struggled with your same plight for years, and am just now starting to pull myself up out of it and it feels sooo wonderful. My family was suffering because of how bad it was. DH and I were fighting everyday and I decided it was time to get(as others say)"ruthless" with gettin' rid of that junk! Here's what helped me: First I stopped trying to organize things. I found that this just got me mired (sp?) in more messes. You can worry about organizing later. Then I got a milkcrate and put it up on a shelf where it was in plain site but out of kids reach. I filled that crate everyday and then took it to the thrift store everyday. And everyday before going to the thrift store I'd say everybody grab one thing that can go, it actually got to be fun! Doing it a little at time made all the difference in the world for me.
And about the things that are worth money. Ask yourself if having it around is worth your mental well-being or not. If not then let it go. Chances are you won't regret it. Hope this helps!
P.S. Oh yeah and I stopped buying so much stuff too. I had a very bad habit of buying thing that I didn't necessarily need.

[Vixenmama]

Originally Posted by oceanbaby

I only have a few seconds to reply before the kids come barging in . . .

Oh yeah, got a garage full of goodwill bags. Well, of course they first sit in my hallway for a couple of weeks or until we have company over, then it gets transferred to the garage. But it rarely makes it out of the house. That sounds like a good project for this weekend - pile up the car with the goodwill bags in the garage send dh off with it.....

I've been completely inspired by this thread. I already decided to sign up for the New Years 500 items declutter thread. Right now I've got laundry in the washer and dryer, and I've just filled a bag for goodwill. I'm going to drop in off as soon as ds wakes from his nap, and haul off three weeks worth of recyclables to the recycling center.

Originally Posted by oceanbaby

There is one room that is by far the worst, and I'm sitting in it right now: The playroom/office/changing table/kids' dresser room. The toys, the cloth diapers, the clothes clothes clothes!

Sounds like a candidate for your first goal "room". This room sounds so overworked!!!


I'm going to snap some pix of some of my messes and post. I'm not afraid!

[Leta]

Originally Posted by mommaof3boz

What about painting the walls in your house?

Ooh, I think this is a fantastic idea! Daydream and plan about my new color scheme and set that as the goal...

oceanbaby, I did not figure out the laundry thing on my own.
(I didn't graduate with honors, either.) I read it in the Tightwad Gazette. So don't feel bad!

[philomom]

I don't have much to add to some of the wise previous posts except that I was raised by two huge packrats. This has motivated me to keep an orderly house for my own children. Nothing was worse than literally stepping over piles as a kid and being ashamed to have playdates over. My home is not perfect but it's 500 times neater and cleaner than what I remember from childhood and I don't fear drop by company the way my mom did.

[um_hanna]

hi momma
honestly, your probably need to get rid of alot of unneeded stuff in the house. i know easier said then done. but your probably overloading on things and dont have enough space for it all
have a garage sale, get bags, trash and donate
go around w/ a trash bag, it will take a few times, but eventually you will feel a weight, literally lifted less is really more

[Yooper]

Our "computer room" is in the main part if our house because we do not have a spare room anywhere else. When we first moved into this house, i was panicking because even when I am at my best organizing and cleaning, my computer desk is always a mess. An organized mess, but nothing that is going to blend into the decor IYKWIM? We went to IKEA (my favorite place on earth) and got two things. A large computer desk with DOORS and stackable cabinets in the same style and shape. We have evolved to keeping the computer desk pretty tidy, but it is still ugly. I love that I can just close the doors and it disappears. Dh keeps all of his computer cords, printer paper, discs in one cabinet and I keep all of our paperwork, bills, and stationary in the other. When they get full, we purge. However, I am feeling the clutter-busting bug again. I am getting a laptop soon and the whole computer cabinet will be useless. My plan is to turn it into dd's craft area. There are high-up shelves for drying stuff. Plenty of storage space. A good work surface. And it can ALL BE CLOSED UP.

[lmonter]

Originally Posted by Yooper

Our "computer room" is in the main part if our house because we do not have a spare room anywhere else. When we first moved into this house, i was panicking because even when I am at my best organizing and cleaning, my computer desk is always a mess. An organized mess, but nothing that is going to blend into the decor IYKWIM? We went to IKEA (my favorite place on earth) and got two things. A large computer desk with DOORS and stackable cabinets in the same style and shape. We have evolved to keeping the computer desk pretty tidy, but it is still ugly. I love that I can just close the doors and it disappears. Dh keeps all of his computer cords, printer paper, discs in one cabinet and I keep all of our paperwork, bills, and stationary in the other. When they get full, we purge. However, I am feeling the clutter-busting bug again. I am getting a laptop soon and the whole computer cabinet will be useless. My plan is to turn it into dd's craft area. There are high-up shelves for drying stuff. Plenty of storage space. A good work surface. And it can ALL BE CLOSED UP.

Oooh, do you have photos of your desk setup?

I've been dreaming of how we can better organize an area for me (I currently use all flat surfaces in the main living area for my crap - no desk, nothing) and have been trying to find a way to do a decent desk with lots of cabinet space with doors up above (easier to keep away from little hands).

[Yooper]

I do not have a photo but this set-up seems to be an IKEA specialty. We had several to pick from and they were all very inexpensive. This is the computer cabinet we have:

http://www.ikea.com/webapp/wcs/store...umber=50030561

I did not browse further to find the matching cabinets but at the time they were about $70 each. The cabinet is bigger than it looks. If it about 3.5 feet wide.

[Yooper]

Another trick I recently learned.....

I have a VERY hard time parting with baby clothes (or anything my dd outgrows). We have kept a lot of it as there is still a teeny chance we might have another. I am only going to keep it for another year or so when the decision will be final. But I know when I pack up each crop of outgrown clothing that it will be more sentimental to me in a year when dd is totally out of the toddler/baby stage and it will be hard for me to part with things. I do want to keep some things for my own sentimental reasons and to pass down to dd when she grows up. But I do not want it to be a burden to either of us so I have a very good idea of what limits I want to put on it. When she first outgrows something, it is so commonplace to me that I can look at it objectively. So when I go through her stuff to put things in the attic, I make three piles. There are boxes to go with these piles that I drag out of the attic each time. I keep a BIG box in her closet to throw random things in and only do a big sorting about every 6 months. AT that time I sort things into catagories. Things I want to keep forever, things I will resue if I have a baby but want to pass along to friends or family if I decide not to, and things I would reuse if I had a baby but would want to donate if I do not. Of course there is the fourth pile that goes direct to Goodwill if I do not even want to save it. The point is that when that decision is made, I can leave the one single box that has things I want to keep and can get rid of all of the other boxes without resorting. Resorting leads to saving more stuff that I do not need to do. I know that I have that one special diaper, her first Christmas dress, her lovey, her favorite baby toy, etc....in the special box. The rest can go. If I do not even look, I will not even remember what each item is and will not miss it. I also label the boxes by size.

[CrunchyCate]

Originally Posted by marieangela

I can totally relate to your original post and to this. Every time I clear off the kitchen counter it is covered again in no time. I really want someone to do this with me. I definitely need the kids not to be there (almost 4 year old NEEDS me to PLAY with him and 15 month old tears things up faster than I can clean them). I have Too Much Crap syndrome with sentimentality and "I could use this someday" thrown in and perfectionist issues. Plus a husband who works all the time. Don't remember the last time someone has come to my house. Besides being an introvert, I don't want people (like those from ds1's preschool) with bigger, nicer, cleaner houses seeing my house.

I can relate to so much on this thread (including the original post, which I almost could have written word for word), but this is the part that really gets to me- I can NOT stand the thought of anyone coming to this house. The only few people I allow over are people who have about as much clutter as me. I don't even let my DD have friends over , because I don't want them telling their moms (or worse yet their moms coming over) how messy our house is!

[bunnybartlett]

Oh Boy I

could have written your post.I have said those exact same words to hubby many times...."there must be something wrong with me!!"

I just cannot do it..I cannot keep up with my house.I was a disorganized person before kids and now I am just a mess.

I really really want to do it and I seem to work and work and never get anywhere!!

my house is really small....900 sq ft and I am tired all the time I work part time outside the home.My hubby is gone driving overnights twice a week.

My question to all of you is while you are cleaning and organizing what are your children doing.??? mine don't play well independantly.The little one is too little yet and is teething and spends most of the day clinging to my leg and crying if I don't hold her.If I hold her or sling her she wants to touch everything and screams if she doesn't get her way!! The 4 yr old wants me to play with her all the time.The only way out is the television which has been way overused lately and we have to shut it off for a while.I try to include them in the cleaning but that doesn't always work out.Naptime doesn't buy me much time.she sleeps about 1 1/2 hours but I nurse her down and when she wakes up after about 45 min I nurse her back to sleep again!! Sometimes I give up and nap with her.....

Most days I get so frustrated I give up and just hang out with them.I try to tell my hubby thats what AP is all about but he is tired of living in the mess.He helps out infrequently and when he does is very resentful he feels it is my job.He got spoiled the two years I was a SAHM....although I can't say it was a lot better then either but at least I only had one child.

I too feel I am borderline ADD but have no way of knowing.I have just always been this way.It didn't seem so bad when I was a smoker pre children.I guess that helped me focus.Now I am just overwhelmed all the time.


I am subscribing hoping for some good advice too!!

You are not alone Oceanbaby!!

[kamesennin]

Linda, can you start from one room and then work from there? Like your sink, and then move to the drawers, cabinets, etc? Once one room is clean it will be easier to move onto the next one. Can you invite a friend over to watch your older daughter while you do a little bit of organizing/purging? I try to fit in sweeping the floor while dd is eating a snack (something that does not make a mess).