flexibility vs consistency

[JenMidwife]

okay, i know the "schedule" thread got heated & canned & i swear i'm not trying to go back there.

but this is something i'm trying to wrap my head around. for example:

we were finding that we just weren't feeling very rested co-sleeping. erin & i kept waking each other up more & more. dh is supposed to wear a cpap (for sleep apnea) & didn't feel comfortable wearing that while co-sleeping cause he gets in to such a deep sleep.

so over a month, we transitioned into the crib & it was not traumatic for any of us (does anyone else love the swaddlers w/ the velcro on them as much as me?). however, erin wakes up earlier than she used to & i have a feeling that if i brought her in to bed w/ me, we could sleep for another hour or two.

but i don't want to confuse her... kwim?

i know consistency is important for kids, but dh & i are very go w/ the flow & it's important that our family be like that. i'm sure that it's different for each kid & as we get to know erin better we'll figure it out. but in the mean time, what do you guys think?

[blairinargentina]

Originally Posted by JenMidwife

so over a month, we transitioned into the crib & it was not traumatic for any of us (does anyone else love the swaddlers w/ the velcro on them as much as me?). however, erin wakes up earlier than she used to & i have a feeling that if i brought her in to bed w/ me, we could sleep for another hour or two.

but i don't want to confuse her... kwim?

i know consistency is important for kids, but dh & i are very go w/ the flow & it's important that our family be like that. i'm sure that it's different for each kid & as we get to know erin better we'll figure it out. but in the mean time, what do you guys think?

I was reading this thinking, "wow, I could've written that thread!". Ditto on the crib transition... it was easy for all of us, we all sleep better now, etc.

We are also super flexible people and need dd to be too. if she wakes up in the morning i just bring her in bed with me, nurse her, and she falls back to sleep. sometimes i then put her back in the crib. and she sleeps well for a few more hours. i dont think she is confused by it. or if she is, it doesnt upset her at all.

we were really concerned about consistency i nthe beginning too. and i am sure it is more important for some babies than others, but for us it doesnt mean not having her in our bed here and there.

[lenore80]

I wish I could get DD to sleep in her cosleeper. Im not sleeping well at all because I can't stretch out.

I feel so conflicted-sometimes I just REALLY want to sleep, other times I just love to snuggle in bed with her, ykwim? It always seems to work out that at the time I NEED to sleep, she has to be in bed with us.

[cpop]

I think this soooo depends on your kid. Some kids like flexibility. My dd would have freaked out (and still does) from any kind of change. You know your kid, yourself and your dh, and you know what would work for your fam.

[veganf]

I'd go with your instincts. I'm sure if you keep the baby between you and the edge of the bed/wall/rail it would be fine for a few hours in the morning. We do the same thing for a few months after transitioning to a crib. From 9-12 months I've noticed they tend to wake between 4-6am, and bringing them to bed gets you that extra hour again. Personally, I'd try it! If you notice her waking earlier and earlier, maybe stop doing it again.

And thanks for the flood of PM support after that locked thread everybody! You're all wonderful mamas. :

[mamamilkers]

I would try and bring her to bed, too, if for no other reason than trying to squeak out some more sleep

veganf, I noticed your PM box was full! LOL

[BetsyS]

Will sleeps in a crib, too, because I wasn't getting any sleep with all the little noises and grunts all night long. Occasionally when he wakes at like 5:30, I bring him back to bed and he does sleep another hour or two. Very nice.

He usually gets up at 7, so anytime he wakes up after 6, we just go on and get up for the day. That works for us, though, cause we're pretty early to bed, early to rise type people. (We feel like we've had a horrible evening if he doesn't go to bed until 9 pm. )

[mrs rockstar]

I know many families who only cosleep for a few hours in the early morning and they all seem to do fine with it. You know your child best, if change doesn't seem to bother her, by all means get those extra few hours of sleep!!

[taradt]

I agree if it buys you a couple more hours go for it you will know soon enough if it works for you guys.

Both my kids have done good with "go with the flow"

tara

[JenMidwife]

thanks all! plus, i do miss waking up to little miss milky smiles

[SummerTwilight]

I am oblivious, I didn't know that last thread got closed- how does that happen? Who closes it? I agree that if that IS your schedule then it is both consistent AND flexible. I am sure you know best.

[lenore80]

DD nursed ALL NIGHT LONG. Literally. I am so tired.

I think I am going to try harder to transition her to her cosleeper.

[peilover010202]

I do this. Elliot sleeps for several hours each night in his carseat (yep, still) and around 4am, i bring him to bed with me. It helps me get several more hours of sleep and it doesn't confuse him at all.