"The Best" school

[Ellien C]

It has ocurred to me that I don't feel that sending my child to "the best" school possible is a pre-cursor to her profound success and happiness. DH and I went to "ordinary" public schools (but in the Northeastern US) where PS are pretty good to begin with.

Many of my neighbors and people I know are very committed to sending their children to the best schools they can afford. But I don't seem to feel that's critical - and in some cases, "the best" schools seem to be breeding grounds for competition of all sorts.

Your thoughts?

[MamaDimstam]

I agree with you- though the impression I get is that up here in Canada the quality of public education is a little more consistent. I went to an inner city public school with a huge ESL population. It didn't hamper me in any way, in fact I think it was good to be in an environment where everyone didn't look/talk like me.

I would also go a bit further and say that it's not critical to go the "the best" (whatever that means, because really our kids are all different!) school, but it's more important that they end up with a teacher with whom they are a good fit, and that the school overall is run well and in a philosophy that more or less fits with the parents.

[wildmonkeys]

I agree completely. I also think that people define "best" differently. I am very happy with my children attending our local school which performs well while not as good as some of the "best" schools in our county because of the school's culture. They focus on respect and appreciation of diversity and work hard to make the kids feel like special individuals. One of my friends recently moved to a "better" school district in our area and it seems that despite their perfect test scores they are missing out on many of the things that make us so happy with our neighborhood. Likewise, I know somebody whose kids are at a very expensive and exclusive local private school and spend 3-plus hours on firstgrade homework each night. That isn't the experience that I would define as best for my kids though the parents seems very happy with the "high standards enforced" by the school

Interesting question - will be curious to see what others think.

BJ
Barney, Ben & soon to be #3!!!

[flyingspaghettimama]

I would totally blow off the "best" schools mantra. It's often hyped by very competitive parents who want to later brag about how much homework their kid gets per night (hmm, not so impressive when you think about all the other cool things the kids could be doing, if they only had the time) and how great their child's test scores are on some meaningless first grade test.

Feh.

[1xmom]

TA w/wildmonkeys and flyingspaghettimama

[elizam]

I'm With Everyone Else Here

I'm not terribly impressed with *any* PSes, no matter what their test scores are. People have actually admitted to dh that they chose where they live based on how many people of certain demographics there are. :

[Flor]

I did put ds in the school that I thought was best for him-- one with arts, small, loving enviroment, stable staff, hands on learning, small groups, and crunchy families. I'm not interested in test scores, but it was important to me to find the best environment for my kid.

[Mom2fiya]

Flor - we did the same for dd, we put her in a school that was best for her. The school she attends is smaller and the teachers are wonderful, always so bubbly and kind.

[daylily]

While on the one hand, I'm pleased that the public schools in my city have excellent resources and are considered "good", OTOH, I don't feel any particular motivation to move out to the suburbs or otherwise strain our finances to get my kids into the "best" school.

It's what you make of the education you get, more than what school you go to.

[QueenOfThePride]

I think the best school is governed by child-led semi-structured learning philosophy that encourages critical thinking. There would be no testing at all, and no grades. I did actually just find a small private school near us that fits the bill!

[nurnur4evr]

Interesting topic! I just took my daughter out of a "better" focus school (still PS) and over the break, I am moving her into the local neighborhood school, because I am working now and the commute was draining me. There's nothing wrong with the new school, in fact it has some outstanding programs, but it doesn't have the snooty reputation of the other school.

She just met her teacher, and I could instantly tell that we had come to the right place. Her other teacher was nice, but my daughter needs a teacher who won't be easily manipulated. This teacher is going to challenge my daughter in a way that she needs to be challenged! I am really happy about this. I think "chemistry" with a class is an unpredictable, but crucial, element to "success".

Some of the parents at the "better" school seem to have turned out to be fair-weather friends, who aren't interested in a friendship with someone who would send their child to the local neighborhood school, for whatever reason.

I agree with what the others have said.

[Ellien C]

Originally Posted by daylily

While on the one hand, I'm pleased that the public schools in my city have excellent resources and are considered "good", OTOH, I don't feel any particular motivation to move out to the suburbs or otherwise strain our finances to get my kids into the "best" school.

It's what you make of the education you get, more than what school you go to.

Thanks everyone for your replies. Daylily exactly nailed what I was thinking. I just couldn't put it into words. I don't feel the need to flee to the suburbs for better schools and DH and I have no intention of straining our finances to provide the "best" education for our kid. I completely agree that education is what you make of it.

[2GR8KIDS]

The town I live in has the "best" public schools in the state (based on the test scores) but many families still send their kids to private school. Many parents around here that if it is harder to get into a school the school must be the "best". It starts early- there is a preschool in town that I think is really lousy (all teacher-directed art projects that look like they came off an assembly line, little outdoor play space) but parents camp out 1 or 2 nights to get a spot. You ask them why they choose these schools, and many parents can't articulate anything other than that the school has a "good reputation" or is "very selective." I'm really happy with our public school and think it will provide my kids a great foundation in the basics and some cool extras. But I think school is only one part of a child's learning experience, and what happens away from school is equally or more important to helping them develop curiosity and a drive to learn.

[mommy68]

I didn't choose what I thought was the "best" private school for my children. I chose what was affordable, close to our home and where the people were nice and had the same religious beliefs we do. However, I don't think it's the best and never would try to say that. I believe that they do the best they can though.