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More than one gift from Santa????? - Page 3

post #41 of 92
When I was a kid Santa spoiled me rotten. I use to do the same with my kids, did it with the older ones for years. But a few years ago I decided NO MORE. Santa is cheap now Each kid gets one gift from Santa and a couple of gifts from us and that's it. And the Santa gift is always made of wood - like could be made in an elf workshop.
post #42 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaSoleil View Post
I am so so frustrated!!!! We moved to a new community, and apparently all the kids in dd's class, get two to three gifts from santa!!! What the *&*^%!
Can't we all agree to just one? I'm for the magic of Christmas, and have never gone over board, one gift from Santa, one gift to each child, and one family gift. That's it, done!!!! So now, dd is asking why do some kids get more from Santa? Are they better than her???? I think it's time to tell her the truth!!!!
Any insight???

Truly,

Mamasoleil
Am I reading you right? That bolded part? I'm seriously with Jennifer on this. My head is :. No, we can't all agree to just one. That's the beauty of life in a republic. You do as you feel best for your own family. And so do I. And so does everyone else. We're not the Borg, here. You do one Santa gift, I do none, and several other people do lots. If you can't handle that, then yeah, I'd say it's time to end Santa (at least as the arbiter of gift-giving; plenty of mamas do Santa as a symbol of the season).
post #43 of 92
Goodness.


The idea is nice, but the reality is not. Every family is so different. We all come from different places and traditions and beliefs. If someone asked me to only give one present to my child from Santa I would not agree to do that. We don't "do" Santa that way.

Regardless of my beliefs or my neighbors beliefs on how to gift at Christmas, it is our individual right to gift how we choose. If the kids are wondering "why", then we each (as parents) need to come up with a way to explain it to our children or out the mystery of Santa.

Just my 2 cents.
post #44 of 92
don't most school age kids know there isn't a santa? I know when we were in school and talked about what we got for xmas we didn't say which ones were from santa and which ones were from everyone else. Most of our presents (too big to wrap) were from "santa"
post #45 of 92
When I was a child all of my gifts were from 'santa' . Dh always had the one gift from 'santa' and the rest were from his parents. With our kids we are now doing what Dh's family did. (Dh doesn't want the big guy to have all the credit )

I agree though that there are so many differences in the way families do things that there will never be a norm in this catagory.
post #46 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Bride View Post
This is interesting. Does everybody make sure their kids get whatever they ask "Santa" for? We've never done that. When I was a child, I saw Santa as being just like everybody else in that respect - he can be told what you want, but that may not be what you get. I do the same thing with my kids.
This was tagged to my post...and I should clarify. We chat casually about what they want, and if it's big and/or expensive, we talk about the size of the sleigh to swing them around. We love the book "if the world were a village of 100 people" (unicef) and the notion of each child getting one present works in that context. Without going long to explain, to me I like the idea of a child getting what they ask for from a very special fellow who's mission is to bring joy to the heart of a child (won't insert wretching smilie here). It's not just about a guy in red flooding the world with presents in a happenstance way to me. He's a thoughtful guy .

Snort...DS blew mom's fantasy world away today. Yesterday when he saw santa at the park (community xmas lights thing), he asked for the guitar. So, he figured that covered the guitar. Today, he drew a picture of some invention of his that at varying time included hot wheels, a dinosaur, a gun for shooting , a truck for moving dirt, and a bunch of other stuff...well, he gave that to santa, and advised me forcefully in the line waiting for our turn that santa's giving him 10 presents.

Needless to say, he'll get the guitar from santa, and he won't be getting the big destructo invention.
post #47 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sagesgirl View Post
Am I reading you right? That bolded part? I'm seriously with Jennifer on this. My head is :. No, we can't all agree to just one. That's the beauty of life in a republic. You do as you feel best for your own family. And so do I. And so does everyone else. We're not the Borg, here. You do one Santa gift, I do none, and several other people do lots. If you can't handle that, then yeah, I'd say it's time to end Santa (at least as the arbiter of gift-giving; plenty of mamas do Santa as a symbol of the season).
I read the OP's tone to be venting. As in carp, I've got a pita situation and gotta figure my way out. Similar to "why the heck can't everyone else just stay home Saturdays so the mall's not so busy!"
post #48 of 92
We don't do santa so I can't help you, but just seeing your name made me feel like friggin Santa came into my house
post #49 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by Super Pickle View Post
Mamsoleil,
Just stick to what you've been doing all along.

One gift from Santa is plenty. Don't you think that too many gifts just overwhelms children anyway?


Some ideas:
- You could write a letter to your dd "from Santa" and put it with the gift, acknowledging the ways she's grown over the past year and the things she should be proud of. He can tell her why he picked out this special gift just for her. "Santa" wrote me a letter one year and it meant so much to me. It's the only thing he ever brought me that I actually remember. So what if other kids got 4 presents, your dd got a personalized letter! Santa really cares about her.

- If you're wondering what to do about her questioing Santa, you could tell or read her a story about St. Nicholas and how his spirit of generosity and love for children has carried on through all these years. Talk about how the spirit of St. Nick lives on differently in every country and every home. I think she can interpret it in her own way--still "believing" in a real person if she is still at that stage, or chosing to embrace a new understanding of Santa-still magical and wonderful but not make-believe. I've always phrased it this way, and read my kids the stories of St. Nicholas, and so far (6 and 3), they choose to believe in the make-believe way.
I love this! Thank you for posting it.
post #50 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by A&A View Post
I want most of the credit. So, Santa doesn't get much credit here (maybe one or two gifts).

We don't "do" Santa but this cracked me up (whether it was meant to or not).
post #51 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by Periwinkle View Post
We don't "do" Santa but this cracked me up (whether it was meant to or not).

We started out doing Santa, so we still do Santa, but the more I think about it, it does irk me. I work hard to make the money (and so does dh), then we spend a lot of time picking out things they would like, wrapping them, getting excited, etc., and then some anonymous old guy gets the credit! So, the "Santa" presents have decreased and the "Mom and Dad" presents have increased.
post #52 of 92
Growing up we always got several gifts from Santa. I don't even remember an incident where I compared how many Santa gifts other children got.
post #53 of 92
Are you worrying about Santa in particular, or about the increased materialism (many, many gifts per kid) in your new community? I think there you could really be addressing a genuine issue, because if your kid comes into class and says "I got mittens and a doll for Christmas from Santa and my mom," and everybody else says "Wow, your Christmas sucks, I got a PS3 and a new computer and Barbie Mermaid Lagoon Fantasy Island and Butterscotch the Live Pony," you're going to have to address that. In many communities that list of presents is not too far off--I remember kids in my class getting presents like $200 in a card (when they were ten! In 1980!) or word processors, and I got three books and some personalized pencils (though never misspelled ).

In my house we don't have a number of gifts; we have a budget. So one kid may get ten little gifts and the other may get one "big" one (our budget is pretty small, so "big" is like $50, not $300). Santa occasionally brings gifts, but they would be frivolous or funny, not serious. We handle materialism by saying, "Look, every family is different. Your dad and I love you so much that we've made different choices for you--look at the x,y,z that we do that is very different from the way your classmates live. I know it feels unfair now, but I bet your friends sometimes think it's unfair that you have [lots of animals, a mom who is home, etc.]" We also understand the holidays in a religious context, which won't work for everyone, but we really do work to have the kids understand that if they're concentrating on presents they're thinking pretty shallowly.

I hope you can work it out to everyone's satisfaction!
post #54 of 92
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by cheer mom View Post
Wait, I want to make sure that I understand this--you want to make sure that everyone in your neighborhood only gets 1 gift from Santa and you think that all parents should agree to a set number of Santa gifts. : : You want to dictate the number of labeled Santa gifts for your whole neighborhood? Do you live in a communist country? I honestly have never heard such a rediculous statement. I'm not sure whether to laugh or to enraged.

I'll tell you what, you take care of your family and I'll take care of mine.
Wow, okay...it was a thought. I guess I'm just some dreamer that in a perfect world, all would be perfect I guess.
Maybe it's just the naitivity that I've managed to hold on to in my 31 yrs of life, that everyone is good, and that maybe, one gift from Santa is plausible, that no child is left feeling...less. But anyway...
Seeing as that is obviously laughable for you Cheer Mom...
My dd and I had a fabulous chat, and she knows Santa is not truly real, but has decided to continue with the magic of it. And thankfully, she as I is a beautiful naive soul who sees the true beauth of life, and has told me, that as long as we are together as a family, the magic of Christmas lives one.
To those who were respectful, and gave me their thoughts, I thoroughly enjoyed reading all the different ideas out there. Thank you for sharing, the specialness of Mothering!
Truly, and peacefully,

Mamasoleil
post #55 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaSoleil View Post
that maybe, one gift from Santa is plausible, that no child is left feeling...less. But anyway...
But for that to be possbile there would have to be a spending limit on that one gift as well.
post #56 of 92
I find that we have gravitated to the same thing. Only 1 gift per child is a Santa gift now. My oldest was having a very hard time having gratitude and taking care of the things that Santa had brought her. In her mind they were "free", so she thought she didn't need to care for them in the same way she would need to care for a toy that mom and dad had bought her. (she was 7-8 when that all came about) I don't understand her reasoning at all. I don't shower my children with toys all year, and I don't go overboard for Christmas either. She's learning....and you can bet those tags clearly read "From MOM and DAD"

Quote:
Originally Posted by A&A View Post
We started out doing Santa, so we still do Santa, but the more I think about it, it does irk me. I work hard to make the money (and so does dh), then we spend a lot of time picking out things they would like, wrapping them, getting excited, etc., and then some anonymous old guy gets the credit! So, the "Santa" presents have decreased and the "Mom and Dad" presents have increased.
post #57 of 92
We give half the gifts, Santa the rest. The number of gifts from Santa depends on expense. This year Santa is giving one big present. Other years it has been 3 smaller ones. I don't know what other families do.
post #58 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaSoleil View Post
[B][B]Wow, okay...it was a thought. I guess I'm just some dreamer that in a perfect world, all would be perfect I guess.
Maybe it's just the naitivity that I've managed to hold on to in my 31 yrs of life, that everyone is good, and that maybe, one gift from Santa is plausible, that no child is left feeling...less.l
That's lovely, but I'm still left wondering why you think one gift per child is "perfect"? That leaves me confused - it feels like you are implying those who do more than one gift are somehow not good - you are imposing your version of Santa on everyone else and I think it's very unfair. It is a make-believe fantasy for children, some choose to participate, some do not.

I'm also left wondering - does that one gift have to have a certain monetary value, does it have to be a particular type of toy, et cetera, et cetera... I'm not trying to be snarky, and I'm glad you worked out the whole thing with your child, but I don't think that the whole Santa myth was really coming out of a place of making every child feel equal...if that was the case we could all just agree to buy a pair of socks and be done with it.
post #59 of 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaSoleil View Post
Wow, okay...it was a thought. I guess I'm just some dreamer that in a perfect world, all would be perfect I guess.
Maybe it's just the naitivity that I've managed to hold on to in my 31 yrs of life, that everyone is good, and that maybe, one gift from Santa is plausible, that no child is left feeling...less. But anyway...
Seeing as that is obviously laughable for you Cheer Mom...
My dd and I had a fabulous chat, and she knows Santa is not truly real, but has decided to continue with the magic of it. And thankfully, she as I is a beautiful naive soul who sees the true beauth of life, and has told me, that as long as we are together as a family, the magic of Christmas lives one.
To those who were respectful, and gave me their thoughts, I thoroughly enjoyed reading all the different ideas out there. Thank you for sharing, the specialness of Mothering!
Truly, and peacefully,

Mamasoleil
but you are implying that there is something bad about more than 1 gift. And what about the families that don't do Santa at all? I guess they would now have to. There is nothing wrong with having Santa give one present, just like there is nothing wrong with Santa giving 10 presents, or however many the parents decide, but that's the thing--it's up to the parents to decide. It's not up to the neighbors, the teachers or the government to decide. I guess I see this as so ironic because many people at MDC are so concerned about individual rights and freedoms, yet here is someone saying that we should have a rule about 1 present. Irony?

And the other thing is that there are so many ways to "explain" the number of Santa gifts to your dd, I wouldn't tell my dd about Santa if that was my only reason. Also, as long as your dd got the thing that made her happy--then why worry about the number of presents?
post #60 of 92
We don't count the number of gifts we give to DS. We give him what our heart tells us to give him and what we want him to have.

Yes, this year got 1 big gift from Santa and more gifts. Some "gifts" included books and crayons and a couple of items for the $ Dollar store. Stocking stuffers if you will.

And he will get more gifts from family members and friends which we can't control what his loved ones want to get as well and we will be grateful and appreciative for their thoughtfulness.
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