For background, my mom has always had some issue or another all of my life. These "illnesses" followed a pretty predictable pattern and eventually after many many doctors appointments and tests it would slowly fade away. She is a bit dramatic, and loves the attention that is called to her when she tells people about these illnesses and from the various doctors and nurses along the way. But over time it gets too difficult to keep up the symptoms or testing will definatively rule out what she thinks she has so she gives up.
For the last year or so, she is convinced she has ALS. At first, as always, the whole family was concerned and frightened. I've cared for ALS patients and know very well how terrible a disease it is to live with. My Stepdad was concerned enough to go to several specialists with her before he found they were all telling her the same thing and dismissing her, only referring her to someone else when she insisted. She does her research so she knows just what to say to perpetuate the testing. She also has a great talent for not hearing what is actually said and her version of those appointments is always very different.
This episode has completely taken over her life. She doesn't talk about anything other than her symptoms and her much anticipated rapid decline. She can't go more than a few minutes without telling us how we will soon be pushing her in a wheelchair and how she will be bedridden. She says things like this to my son too, which would really bother me if he was old enough to understand. Thankfully for the moment he is only 2.5 and doesn't know what any of it means. Every conversation is filled with stories of how she can barely hold anything or walk. Then a minute later she is holding my son up over her head or moving furniture, last time I was home she opened a bottle of wine that I couldn't even budge. She told me at least 3 times how she was a "bull in the china shop" at the candy store this week. But I was THERE with her and while she did drop something once she was also trying to hold a bunch of different bags at once. None of us know what to do about this anymore. I basically ignore the stories and complaints, so she tells me the same thing again and again looking for my reaction.
My Stepdad is at his wits end with all of this. She was just visiting here for 4 days and I was annoyed the whole time because of this. She steers every single conversation to her illness, and the excitement and glee she feels about it is disturbing. I don't know what to do, or what to say to her. It takes all my willpower to just say nothing because I want to snap and call her on the whole thing. She spends a lot of time online looking up the disease, and is now a very active participant on an ALS support group board. This REALLY bothers me. I feel like she is scamming these people with ACTUAL illnesses and real life problems. But they sympathize with her and feed into her need for attention and she can't resist.
Is there some way we should be handling this that we aren't? We've considered an intervention or something but she's so deeply entrenched in her story none of us think it would work. She's already pouting and complaining because my Stepdad replied once that he had no intention of pushing her around in a wheelchair anytime soon. We just keep hoping like all the other things it will go away but it's gone on much, much longer than anything else ever has.
For the last year or so, she is convinced she has ALS. At first, as always, the whole family was concerned and frightened. I've cared for ALS patients and know very well how terrible a disease it is to live with. My Stepdad was concerned enough to go to several specialists with her before he found they were all telling her the same thing and dismissing her, only referring her to someone else when she insisted. She does her research so she knows just what to say to perpetuate the testing. She also has a great talent for not hearing what is actually said and her version of those appointments is always very different.
This episode has completely taken over her life. She doesn't talk about anything other than her symptoms and her much anticipated rapid decline. She can't go more than a few minutes without telling us how we will soon be pushing her in a wheelchair and how she will be bedridden. She says things like this to my son too, which would really bother me if he was old enough to understand. Thankfully for the moment he is only 2.5 and doesn't know what any of it means. Every conversation is filled with stories of how she can barely hold anything or walk. Then a minute later she is holding my son up over her head or moving furniture, last time I was home she opened a bottle of wine that I couldn't even budge. She told me at least 3 times how she was a "bull in the china shop" at the candy store this week. But I was THERE with her and while she did drop something once she was also trying to hold a bunch of different bags at once. None of us know what to do about this anymore. I basically ignore the stories and complaints, so she tells me the same thing again and again looking for my reaction.
My Stepdad is at his wits end with all of this. She was just visiting here for 4 days and I was annoyed the whole time because of this. She steers every single conversation to her illness, and the excitement and glee she feels about it is disturbing. I don't know what to do, or what to say to her. It takes all my willpower to just say nothing because I want to snap and call her on the whole thing. She spends a lot of time online looking up the disease, and is now a very active participant on an ALS support group board. This REALLY bothers me. I feel like she is scamming these people with ACTUAL illnesses and real life problems. But they sympathize with her and feed into her need for attention and she can't resist.
Is there some way we should be handling this that we aren't? We've considered an intervention or something but she's so deeply entrenched in her story none of us think it would work. She's already pouting and complaining because my Stepdad replied once that he had no intention of pushing her around in a wheelchair anytime soon. We just keep hoping like all the other things it will go away but it's gone on much, much longer than anything else ever has.
