Social skills?

[wallacesmum]

Can anyone direct me to some good threads about the bogus social skills argument against hs or us?
I am searching too but not having much luck.
Thanks.

[2tadpoles]

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...=socialization

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...=socialization

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...=socialization

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...=socialization

[nancy926]

My standard reply to this is that I'd rather have my daughter learn social skills primarily from her parents than from 25 other 5-year-olds. Why are a bunch of 5-year-olds better prepared to teach my daughter about sharing, empathy, working as a team and compromising????

[wallacesmum]

Thanks! I totally agree. Gatto and others write extensively about how the forced peer grouping just creates big children (I am horrified by the way my late 20s, early 30s friends will act in public during a night of bar-hopping), and certainly the whole philosophy of compulsory education was meant to do just that. I am going to read through all the comments as I think about what to say to others. One difficulty with homeschooling, as with so many other things that are not mainstream, is that people assume you are attacking their choices. And, in a way, I am, because I have thought long and hard and made a choice, so I think it is better than the alternatives. On the other hand, I have no desire to alienate a close friend who is a public school teacher by telling her that the system is rotten by design and a total failure - what would that accomplish? So I have to find diplomatic answers.

[2tadpoles]

Originally Posted by wallacesmum

I have no desire to alienate a close friend who is a public school teacher by telling her that the system is rotten by design and a total failure - what would that accomplish? So I have to find diplomatic answers.

I can be a bit blunt at times, but I tend to think that if someone asks my opinion or attacks my choices, then they should be prepared to hear my opinion or counterattack.

If you can't agree to disagree, then I don't think it's a true friendship.

[lizzie]

Originally Posted by 2tadpoles

I can be a bit blunt at times, but I tend to think that if someone asks my opinion or attacks my choices, then they should be prepared to hear my opinion or counterattack.

If you can't agree to disagree, then I don't think it's a true friendship.

:

She's got her experiences and her opinions, and you have yours. Her being a professional teacher in no way renders your opinions silly. The only real difference I see is that she has a piece of paper documenting her education, you just happen to KNOW that you're educated, and have your child's (and your child's alone) best interests at heart.

I agree to disagree quite a bit with those I love! and we've all learned something new from it.


lizzie

[lizzie]

Originally Posted by wallacesmum

And, in a way, I am, because I have thought long and hard and made a choice, so I think it is better than the alternatives. On the other hand, I have no desire to alienate a close friend who is a public school teacher by telling her that the system is rotten by design and a total failure - what would that accomplish? So I have to find diplomatic answers.

Have you lent her any of Gatto's books? He is, afterall, a former teacher, right? She should find his thoughts on the subject interesting, to say the least.


lizzie

[wallacesmum]

It's curious. Not to her, but to another close friend (who teaches in Spanish Harlem, Gatto's old hunting grounds) I did loan the book. He read it and was interested, but said that he was frustrated by the fact that, in the end, Gatto seems to have given up. I thought that was curious because I think that IS the conclusion, give up on the system and redefine your parameters. Take back the word "education" from the beauracratic masses who have defined it to mean "compulsory schooling." Maybe someday he will agree, but he's not ready to yet.

I agree to disagree all over the place, that's a good point.

[lizzie]

Originally Posted by wallacesmum

I thought that was curious because I think that IS the conclusion, give up on the system and redefine your parameters. Take back the word "education" from the beauracratic masses who have defined it to mean "compulsory schooling." Maybe someday he will agree, but he's not ready to yet.

Word! (emphasis mine)

lizzie