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Are mainstream SAHM more into cleaning?

post #1 of 157
Thread Starter 
... or is it just the ones I know?

I can say without a doubt that I have the messiest house of all my mainstream friends. Cleaning and picking up is not a high priority -- okay we don't live in our own filth, but like right now I'm looking at a bunch of stuffed animals on the floor, some shoes, some books, a bathing suit, and a deck of cards has been spread out. And there is a giant pack of play dough sitting next to me, and a rolling pin. And it doesn't bother me. Doesn't really bother my dh either. Anyway, I had a mainstream friend come let out our dogs on Cmas because we weren't home and I left her a note like, "Yes, it always looks this way in here!" because I figured she'd be shocked, and she was.

I've had two friends tell me that they literally CAN'T SLEEP AT NIGHT if they have dishes in the sink or a dirty floor. Huh? :
post #2 of 157
I have definitely noticed this too! What gives? Then again, I always clean up my house if I know I am having company, so maybe they do the same?
post #3 of 157
I don't always do a good job of it, but I really try to keep the house tidy as much as I can. Being preggo with twins now kinda makes it a little harder, so I've had to relax my standards a bit, but as crunchy as I am, I do enjoy having a tidy house.

Perhaps I am more mainstream than you are? ;-)
post #4 of 157
Thread Starter 
I don't know ChristyC, based on your siggy, you seem pretty darn crunchy to me! :

However, I have twins who are almost 4yo now, and I was definitely more neat before I had them. So maybe your time will come!
post #5 of 157
Well, we co-sleep, ebf, cd, gd, and eat/use all organic/natural products. I am a neat freak. I think it's just personality type. I am one of those who can't sleep with a messy house. It just makes me crazy. That being said, I dont mind dd using paint or playdoh or helping me 'cook' in the kitchen. The house does get messy (after all I live with a toddler and have a home daycare) but I make sure to clean it right away. But it doesn't take priority over dd. In fact she helps me clean all the time. I am not the type to use tv to babysit in order to clean. I also dont use her nap time for that. I either lay down, read, or jump online. I just dont let the house get overwhelming. I do little clean ups all day long, so that at the end of the day, I only have a few things to do. Hope that makes sense!
post #6 of 157
Not me. Things are tidy around here but if its not done by the "grown-up" hour, I call it quits. Cultivating my marriage is way more important than a little mess.
post #7 of 157
I despise cleaning too. Right now I want to clean up the mess left behind from Christmas, but the garbage is running a day late and our can is full.

I used to be in awe of perfectly clean homes because we lived in a messy house growing up (4 kids and 2 parents that worked full time). Then I found out that most of them had maids, so my awe meter went way down.

It's easy to have a sparkling clean house when you hire someone else to do it. However, I know some people who clean like they're on speed and seem to enjoy doing so. Just not for me.
post #8 of 157
I was a sahm for 3 years. We're far from mainstream people, my house was cleaned every day. Dishes done after meals. Laundry done every other day (cloth diapers can STINK!).

I don't think it has anything to do w/ mainstream or not... it has to do w/ comfort levels! Also, I considered it part of my sah JOB to keep my house livable!
post #9 of 157
No imaculate house here.

Its clean but lived in. By that I mean there it stuff out wherever my kids have been playing

I am awful about clothes and need to put them away. If I did that this house would look a 50 times better :
post #10 of 157
Originally Posted by philomom View Post
Not me. Things are tidy around here but if its not done by the "grown-up" hour, I call it quits.
Basically what I do also.

...I'm pretty crunchy (especially for a young mother I think) but my house is normally always picked up and clean-clean if you know what I mean (hey...I rhymed : ). But if it's not done in the time I have to myself, which isn't long, then screw it.
post #11 of 157
The only SAH mainstream mom I know is my SIL and she DEFINATLY is more into cleaning than I. She freaked out about my dd having a sippy cup of water on her carpet for pete's sake! She also has told me many times that back when ds4 was a baby, she used to put the tv on for him and then go upstairs to fold laundry in front of the tv. She's another one who can't sleep if there are dishes in the sink or if she hasn't vacuumed since the kids came home (knowing she had vacuumed when they were at school anyways.)

My house is realtivly clean. Yes the floors in the kitchen should probably be swept and mopped more, but other than that, we're doing well. She wouldn't be able to relax here no matter how hard she tried (good thing they never stay with us when they visit )
post #12 of 157
I'm not sure it matters, sure my mainstream Mom and my mainstream SIL are total clean freaks and I'm not but I have a mix of crunchy friends - some have a more lived in look going on and some are super neat.
post #13 of 157
I think it has to do with the child, too...if you have calm, content, self-entertaining little ones you can get an awful lot done in a short amount of time.

Mainstream moms might either force their child to do without mama (playpen, crib, high chair etc) so the child is just used to not being tended, or they may try to give baby alot of attention generally but ignore while cleaning.

With my first and third babies, they were happy to play on the floor or ride in the sling while I cleaned. With my second and fourth babies, I was chained to the rocking chair and when I got to get up I wouldn't be cleaning! I'd be peeing or showering or eating or cooking...Dh did most of the cleaning then.

But high-needs or not, by the time my youngest child is 3 or 4 I can keep a clean house again LOL Toby's 'very' high-needs and he's only 2, so I have awhile to go before we're consistently clean.

I can get the place ready for company in about 30 minutes and I think that's good enough.
post #14 of 157
I just hate cleaning. And I'm not really good about organizing everything and keeping it clean. Part of this is a bit of rebellion. My dad was a neat freak and insisted on everything being totally clean all the time. I hated it. So I don't do it.

I have had days where I've really tried to get some little bit of something done, and I turn into a screeching monster. I'm so stressed about trying to get whatever task I've chosen done, that I end up neglecting/ignoring/yelling at ds1. So it just doesn't seem worth it.
post #15 of 157
I'm somewhere in the middle, I guess. Not overly crunchy but pretty far from the mainstream. Right now I'm not overly concerned about cleaning because I'm 36 weeks pregnant, take online college courses, and have 2 kids. Basically, I'm exhausted so DH has been handling the cleaning duties. When I'm not pregnant and SAH (I usually have at least a PT job, though), my house is cleaned every day. I don't like dirt, clutter, or the weird smells that tend to go along with having small children.
post #16 of 157
I am a clean FREAK. NOTHING can be on the floors or any flat surface. (desks, tables, counters, etc) Floors mopped daily, bathrooms scrubbed daily, daily vacumming, and weekly dusting. But I never make beds. I think I am a neat/clean freak since my parents house is/was always such a disaster. Their bathroom is/was so bad, I feel the need to lay TP on the toilet seat before going. And I hold off going as long as possible. Not just a messy house, but DIRTY. I guess being a neat/clean freak is my rebellion. I am only moderatly crunchy, though. I am very AP, but only moderatly NFL. I only have one child (14 months old) so I am sure things would be different around here if I had more.
post #17 of 157

Interesting theory _ im pretty mainstream - especially compared here @ mdc & my house is very clean & I cant go to bed with dishes in the sink. No pnp or anything - I wore dd when she was little & I cleaned & now she likes to help so we do it together. (Give my dd a rag & she will wipe a surface. Its really cute!) I also only have 1 & things slip more than before I had a baby so Im sure it will get even messier when #2 gets there this summer!

My sister is very mainstream & more of a neat freak than me & my closest crunchy friend is not a neat freak (tho I would never be shocked at her house). So in my little world - you theory holds very true. I wonder if its cuz us mainstream girls internalize societys standards more & feel internal pressure to clean & crunchy moms are used to bucking the system? - tho I dont clean for other people but I feel happy & satisfied when all the chores are done but who knows how I got this way!
post #18 of 157
Some of my crunchier friends seem more about the cleaning. Fly Lady and all that.
post #19 of 157
I think there are two catagories, one the people that have the "clean" personality and can't stand the mess, and the people who are more concerned with appearances.
post #20 of 157
I think it has to do with keeping up appearances.
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