C-R-A-Z-Y News story

[ShaggyDaddy]

http://www.heraldsun.com/durham/4-803325.cfm

I don't even think I can comment.

[yestheyareallmine]

Did I read that correctly? She had 3 days to revoke consent, and did so before the deadline? And 17 months later she STILL doesn't have her children?

[aja-belly]

http://www.newsobserver.com/102/story/525742.html here is another link. this is a sad story all around. the only thing that is glaringly obvious is that there are some facts missing somewhere.

[aja-belly]

Originally Posted by yestheyareallmine

Did I read that correctly? She had 3 days to revoke consent, and did so before the deadline? And 17 months later she STILL doesn't have her children?

i know! they didn't really (either article) adress that very thoroughly. if she did, then she should have the babies. if she didn't, then why are they still fighting 17 months later? i suspect she did try to revoke her consent and someone somewhere screwed it up and that is the root of the problem. the whole things seems so corrupt.

[Jessy1019]

A group that I work with was in touch with the mom when she was first going through this. By her accounts, she was held in the lawyers office for hours, being pressured to sign . . . and yes, she did revoke her consent (if you can call it that) immediately. This isn't the first time I've heard of a parent revoking her consent within the proper time frame and still having to fight for custody. It shouldn't be that way, but it is.

I haven't heard from her since those very early days when she was in touch with us, but I will definitely say that the whole situation was screwed up from the beginning.

[astra]

It sure seems like a lot is missing from this story.
My heart breaks for this mother, who has been denied her right to parent for 17 months. By kidnapping them, she will probably now not have a chance to get custody of them. She will probably even end up in jail.

[aja-belly]

Originally Posted by Jessy1019

A group that I work with was in touch with the mom when she was first going through this. By her accounts, she was held in the lawyers office for hours, being pressured to sign . . . and yes, she did revoke her consent (if you can call it that) immediately. This isn't the first time I've heard of a parent revoking her consent within the proper time frame and still having to fight for custody. It shouldn't be that way, but it is.

I haven't heard from her since those very early days when she was in touch with us, but I will definitely say that the whole situation was screwed up from the beginning.

that is so so heartbreaking. no wonder some people have such negative opinions about domestic infant adoptions. i hope that mama is somewhere peaceful with her babies. i hope they never find them.

[Finch]

Originally Posted by aja-belly

i hope they never find them.

I'm local, so this story is big news here. They found her, in Canada. It is a very sad story all around.


http://www.wral.com/news/national_wo...story/1121640/

[angelpie545]

How awful. I'm sad that they found them! I hope that against all odds, she gets her children. This just proves that the adoption system can be so awful sometimes! I think that adoption is a wonderful thing when carried out fairly, giving the mother every oppurtunity to re-think and calculate her decision, and accepting it when she revokes her consent. My heart breaks for this poor mother.

[m9m9m9]

I think this story is so sad and I believe it could deter woman who are considering an adoption plan as it seems that the laws put in place to protect them do not work.

I hope this woman prevails in her appeal. I do not understand the "adoptive" parents and how they could possibly have kept the children once she changed her mind within 12 hours. Personally, I think if she wins the appeal she should sue the adoptive parents to recoup her legal expenense as the adoptive parents were in the wrong and they caused her to spend an enourmous sum of money

Maggie.

[pacifica]

Poor Babies!!

[AllyRae]

I don't know...I'm a little confused. I had hyperemesis with Brandon and never ONCE did I consider putting him up for adoption--after you give birth, the hyperemesis goes away and it wouldn't affect her parenting at all. So, why would she even think of giving up her children because of a *pregnancy* related illness (verses maybe finding a friend or hiring a doula to help her in the postpartum period until she regains her strength, but not making a permenant decision based on an illness that is just seen during pregnancy.) Between that, and the fact that she would kidnap 2 children and flee to another country makes me think that something psychologically could be wrong with her.

But, then there's also the case that the adoption of these children was coercive, fraudulent, and for all intents and purposes not legal.

I just feel awful for these babies...they are the real victims here...

[Zyla]

Just a real sad situation, all around ...

[pumpkingirl71]

Originally Posted by AllyRae

I just feel awful for these babies...they are the real victims here...

Yes, and with all big media stories, that gets lost

[DeannaK]

But, then there's also the case that the adoption of these children was coercive, fraudulent, and for all intents and purposes not legal

That's the point. It might not have only been the hyperemesis. She might have been severely coerced. That would drive me crazy enough to take my children back, no matter what the potential ramifications.

These adoptive parents should be ashamed of themselves. (Unless there is a huge chunk of information I'm missing or we have the story wrong.)

[angelpie545]

Originally Posted by AllyRae

I don't know...I'm a little confused. I had hyperemesis with Brandon and never ONCE did I consider putting him up for adoption--after you give birth, the hyperemesis goes away and it wouldn't affect her parenting at all. So, why would she even think of giving up her children because of a *pregnancy* related illness (verses maybe finding a friend or hiring a doula to help her in the postpartum period until she regains her strength, but not making a permenant decision based on an illness that is just seen during pregnancy.) Between that, and the fact that she would kidnap 2 children and flee to another country makes me think that something psychologically could be wrong with her.

But, then there's also the case that the adoption of these children was coercive, fraudulent, and for all intents and purposes not legal.

I just feel awful for these babies...they are the real victims here...

You see though, those are HER children. You cannot "kidnap" your own children, despite what the laws may say, I think that's a ridiculous statement. She obviously did not consent to the adoption, and was obviously given the run-around by the system. Bottom line, those are her children. I'm sorry they found them. I had hoped they wouldn't.

[Jessy1019]

Originally Posted by DeannaK

That's the point. It might not have only been the hyperemesis. She might have been severely coerced. That would drive me crazy enough to take my children back, no matter what the potential ramifications.

It was way more than just the awful pregnancy . . . it was an unsupportive partner pushing her to surrender them so that she would be more available for his needs, nearly dying in childbirth, and everyone around her telling her she was crazy, too old, and couldn't do it. I love (not) how her sister is all over the news talking about how Allison was coerced . . . where was she when it was happening?

The whole thing just makes me sad for this mom and her babies.

[Sagesgirl]

Originally Posted by AllyRae

I just feel awful for these babies...they are the real victims here...

It is not just these babies. It is them most directly, but there are so many other babies who will be affected by this. It's the babies whose mamas won't put them up for adoption even though it's the best choice for all concerned, and it's the babies who won't be adopted because of a false belief that in the US you can just turn around & disrupt the adoption at any time, for any cause. (Yes, I know that's not the reality, but that's what many people will see.)

I hate things like this.

As for the sister, from the brief mention in the second linked article, it seems that the sister put the woman in touch with the adoptive parents, so I do not doubt she was doing a lot of the pushing herself.:

Poor woman, I pray she is given her babies back and has the sense to get far, far from the people who did this to them.

[DeannaK]

It was way more than just the awful pregnancy . . . it was an unsupportive partner pushing her to surrender them so that she would be more available for his needs, nearly dying in childbirth, and everyone around her telling her she was crazy, too old, and couldn't do it. I love (not) how her sister is all over the news talking about how Allison was coerced

So sad.

It's the babies whose mamas won't put them up for adoption even though it's the best choice for all concerned, and it's the babies who won't be adopted because of a false belief that in the US you can just turn around & disrupt the adoption at any time, for any cause. (Yes, I know that's not the reality, but that's what many people will see.)

You are so right!

[sesa70]

Ok so I am confused by this story. She had 3 days to revoke her consent, and 12 hours clearly falls into that time frame. Why would this even be debatable? Why would this even make it to court? She was clearly within her legal rights to expect her children back when she did.

As a pp mentioned, we may not have all the facts... does anyone know for sure that she acted within the time frame allowed, ie did she really revoke when she claimed she did? If so, was it documented? B/C if it was documented or at least witnessed I cant even understand why this has been allowed to go as far as it has.

That being said, I can only imagine her desperation, but I think it was a poor decision to take her babies. Now she will have a much harder time getting them back, whether or not she *should*.