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Anybody not sharing baby name until birth? need to vent - Page 2

post #21 of 67
we didn't tell anyone the name. i was so annoyed by people asking, but i really didn't want to tell people because i didn't want to know their reaction.
people just couldn't stop asking though. we ended up giving them a fake name just to get them to stop. "raydon", from the video game "mortal kombat" was our fake name, we even told them that it was a "mortal kombat" character.
post #22 of 67
We're not going to tell anyone before. I don't need everyones opinion. My babies seemed to communicate the name to me. I felt that both names were perfect when they were born.
post #23 of 67
I'm kind of selective about telling. I like the name we've choosen (Emmett) but it has gotten mixed reactions. Mostly the completely acceptable "that's nice." A few "great name!" and one or two "Ehhhh?" The "Ehhhhhh" really bothers me (particularly when followed by a lot of other name suggestions). I mean, if you ask, please be aware that there are TWO acceptable reactions to the name 1) "nice name" or 2) a lot of enthusiasm. Otherwise, keep your opinion to yourself. Really. Other people have no say in the matter and are severely confused if they think their suggestions are welcome in any way.

One friend kept offer alternative names every time we talked (all of which were terrible, IMHO). I finally said that my and DH's opinions were the only one's that counted and that I had a lot of "rules" about the name that were too complicated for anyone else to follow (in terms of catagory of name, letters it could or could not start with, etc).
post #24 of 67
We aren't telling anyone our boy name this time. I am so sick of reactions, I wouldn't change the name because of it, I just don't need the negativity. Everyone knows the girl name cause we've had it picked out for years. No one likes that name either, but I guess thats their problem.

My mil is the worst. My bil recently had a baby and my mil was soooo sure he was gonna name the baby something just cause when he was 15 he said he liked that name and was gonna name a son that someday (needless to say it wasn't even on his consideration list and bil didn't even remember ever saying that to her). Then once dh told them a name we were considering and she got monogramed clothes (and we didn't even know the gender!). With my first she spilled the news to my aunt - whom my dd is named after - and the poor women cried in front of my wedding party at the news. It was sooo bad. No more telling her names ever!
post #25 of 67
We arent telling. We honestly dont have a name set yet, though, so it isnt too hard not telling. With ds, we knew the name before we knew he was a boy and we got good reactions, but this time we wanted it to be a surprise.
post #26 of 67

btw - I love all the names people have mentioned, not that my opinion should or does

i learned real quick to keep to myself with most people because I was answering a co worker (why does everyone and there dog ask gender? due date? name? people I don't even know sometimes!) and mentioned the girl name we picked first (we are apparently having a boy) and he laughed assumming I was kidding! I shut up quick!
In general I have NEVER done something so private that so many people feel an intense desire to give there two cents about than this whole pregnancy thing. I am shocked almosty daily about how comfortable people feel to give me chunks of their mind when I have not asked for any of it.
post #27 of 67
We aren't telling either. My mother wore out our girl name last time (even though we ended up with boys), and I received way too much unsolicited advice and snide comments on the spelling of one of our boy's names.

This time, we've just told people that we do have a name, but that we aren't sharing. It's enough that they know the gender, we just want to keep some element of surprise for delivery.
post #28 of 67
We couldn't picture naming ours until it (didn't have an US) was born. Once she came, it still took us a couple of days to find her name - Nyamae D'Agata Alloway. The D'Agata is DH's last name and the Alloway is mine.

Did anyone else have difficulty with the last name?????????
post #29 of 67
Haha, some people are talking about the fake name that they tell others to quiet their questioning.

Ours are:

Girl: Sapphire Aqua...."Sapphie"
Boy: Gemini Turquoise...."Jimmy Turk"

post #30 of 67
we didn't tell anyone, but then again, we didn't know gender... so my standard answer was "we have a short list for both"
ppl seemed to let it go at that. then again, most my family and friends know i prefer unusual names: bishop / indigo / etc ...
post #31 of 67
I'm not either... and my mom is giving me the hardest time about it... she is seriosuly hurt that we will not tell her..

(it probably doesn't help that I joked once that I told MIL (I didn't!) and they have a pretty crazy relationship but thats a whole 'nother thread!)
post #32 of 67
In the beginning we told people the names we were considering but we got such awful comments - like "but thats a dog's name!" and "that sounds like a feminine hygiene product" - that we now refuse.

Only my mother and my sister know what names are on our shortlist. We are planning to only decide properly once we meet the little one. It would be nice though if my mother didnt insist on referring to her by her favourite shortlisted name
post #33 of 67
Originally Posted by Ilana View Post
We didn't share last time and we're not sharing this time. Azure was Speck until she arrived on this side of me, and this one is Peanut until s/he is born. My mother seems to think that that name might actually stick, however! We don't share because we don't want reactions either.

Speck is just about the cutest thing i've ever heard.
post #34 of 67
I didn't tell anyone until right after the baby was born and the nurse asked me if he had a name. My partner and I knew pretty much what the name would be but we did want to wait until we met the little guy before assigning a name to him. People always asked (and my mother was always asking) but we just told them that we had a small list and would until he was born before choosing. Yes, it annoyed some people but we really didn't care :-)
post #35 of 67
My one sister hated the names my bro and SIL picked out for their kids. Never stopped talking about how dumb the names were, how they'd get made fun of, etc. Seriously would NEVER stop. THis is my sister that believes the world revolves around her and gets very upset if you tell her otherwise. Honestly, I didn't care for the names they chose, but it's NOT MY CHOICE!! I named my OWN kids. The names they chose are fine, just not in my taste, which is why I chose DIFFERENT names for my kids, you know?

I finally got sick of listening to my sister and I said 'it's a good thing you hate those names b/c eventually you're going to have kids of your own and we wouldn't want 1st cousins to have the same name' and 'when you have kids of your own, you don't have to choose the same names, it's that great!'. I totally turned it around on her and after only 2 or 3 times, she got the clue and shut up about it, at least around me.
post #36 of 67
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by kittycat9 View Post
We aren't telling either. My mother wore out our girl name last time.
After Kai was born, we had told everybody that if we ever had a girl, we were going to name her Marley (after Bob Marley)....about 6 months after we had Kai, my mom got a Cockatoo, and named it Murley. Talk about an instant buzz kill!! I was SOOOO pissed that she did that. She even mentioned how cute it would be that their (IF I ever had a girl) names would be close in sound. NOT!!! I loathe that bird (and I'm an avid animal lover) because it has attacked me 3 times for no apparant reason, and squaks at such a high decible when it sees my son, that he falls to the ground covering his ears and screaming. My mom thinks it's cute and funny. We haven't been to my parent's house in about 2-2 1/2 years because of that bird.
post #37 of 67
we're telling mdc'ers and other online people, but nobody irl. and when people ask... i'll demonstrate.

female friend: so what are you naming the baby?
me: (insert ff's name), but only if it's a boy.


male friend: so what are you naming the baby?
me: (insert mf's name), but only if it's a girl.

or we just say something random and unnamelike. teaspoon, fridge door, highlighter. those are all lovely names, non?
post #38 of 67
I am of the opinion that few people really know how to appropriately react when told the name of a baby that's not physically in front of them, wooing them...the proper response is, "oh, that's wonderful!" or something of the like.

...(shocked look) What??!!
...What about_____?
...Where'd ya get that?
or anything else rude that people say.

It's no one's business but the parents who are naming their baby, no one gets to have an opinion but the parents, and that's that!

We give our baby the most horrible name we can find while flipping through name books so there's a point of reference when referring to our babe and we don't share the real name until the birth. It allows our families, especially, to have something to chatter about, name-wise and to get the "ugh!" out of their systems. And it makes any name we choose that much better.
post #39 of 67
We had a name fake name we told people with #1, Tsunami Grace...but it ended up a "he" which saved him, we didn't want to give him the boy named Tsu quandary...This time I made the mistake of posting our chosen girl name in my ddc, and someone else also picked it up for their chosen name!!! I know we aren't neighbors or anything, but it feels strange to me. The beings may someday meet and maybe that would be cool for them. I still love the name we picked, and we don't even know if we're having a boy or girl, so it may be a non issue anyway. In retrospect, I wish I hadn't put the name out there.
post #40 of 67
We don't tell.

I find that if you tell people in advance, they feel that they can comment right to your face on whether they like the name or not.
When you tell people after the birth, whether they like the name or not, there is not much they can do about it because that's the child's name and that's it.

When people ask if we've picked names, I tell them we have some names that we are considering. If they push, I flat out tell them (gently) that we don't share the names until after the babies arrive.
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