i've never multi-quoted so many quotes!
let's see if this will work..... so much to say-- always starting with BIG HUGS!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kleine Hexe  I I tell women to stick around on ICAN for months because days or weeks won't get you the whole picture.
How does everyone's scars look? I've thought about tatooing my scar.
|
yeah..... i was actually *attacked* for my post there, so it kinda turned me off.... maybe i'll try again-- but maybe this is better for me!
My scar isnt bad. it's still dark in places, but there are parts of it where you cant see anything! what would you tatoo? I actually LOVE that idea...... hmmm!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kleine Hexe That being said....how do you feel?
|
it varries. it's been 9 months now, and the sting is gone. for me, most of it was blaming myself. when it actually came to it, i knew i was doing the right thing.... but i did blame myself for getting there.
*clearly*, i thought, i didnt do this whole pregnancy thing right. clearly, my idea of trusting myself, trusting my body, and listening to my baby was not the right thing, if this is what it led to.... i had awesome help-- from my mws and from the therapist-- to learn that i was right to trust myself, that sometimes our children want to go a way that is not the way we want to go.... actually, that was one of the more helpful things told me-- babies choose their own births, he chose this. from my own experience, it was true for me. i still vividly remember one sleepless night that began with me convinced i'd be able to convince him to turn, and ended with me feeling he'd convinced me that i needed to let it go, and this needed to happen...... anyhow! i trust myself again. phew. but.... i dont think i will do it again-- pg, that is. i find i dont have a need to experience labor-- that was a killer thing to me for a while-- "I'm not a real woman! i'll never be a real woman! i'm like a virgin or something...." killed me for months. but.... not so much. i'm very much in love with him..... and, for now, that has been all i need........ ok, i could go on and on an on.... but there's more i wanted to reply to-----
Quote:
Originally Posted by mimie I'm not angry about my c-section. I feel relieved about it (that my baby and I are fine) and a little sad (that I missed out on some things I wanted to experience with my baby). I'm looking for acknowledgement that a c-section birth is still a birth and can be celebrated. I don't want to feel like I'm supposed to be angry because I'm not.
I don't want to share my story only to have my medical history analyzed. I don't want to be told my induction wasn't necessary or that I shouldn't have had an epidural, or that I didn't need a c-section. I was the one who was there. These were my decisions, made with a trusted medical provider.
|
sounds a lot like me! it IS a birth. one of my mw, before she sent me off to the hospital huged me so tight, told me she loved me, and told me-- THIS IS STILL YOUR BIRTH! she knew we had a party planned for the birth center, and while the hospital setting was not nearly the same, she encouraged me to still celebrate. we did, in a way.... but it was the time after that was really hard. i never sent birth announcements. But when it came time for holiday cards, i made them a photo collage of ds. that was my celebration. I plan on celebrating BIG TIME on his birthday. actually, we celebrate each 6th of the month.... i think you have to reclaim some of it, ya know?
Quote:
Originally Posted by angelcat I identify with alot of this. I really feel like I can't talk about what I do feel, and actually tell my story.
My physical recovery was really bad, though. Not as bad as some I've heard here, but worse than most I have heard, anywhere else & irl.
As for the article that the link was posted for, i skimmed it. I'd have gotten too upset.
|
i would love it if you felt you could share it!!! maybe start with PMing me about it? i'd love to hear your story. and i'd love to hear about the healing. i need to share my healing story. it's been a long road.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by unimatrix0 I remember clearly how the doctors chatted and gossiped as they stitched me up. I had to wait two hours to hold dd and when I finally did, the nurses shoved my dh away, forcefully grabbed my breast and shoved it in dd's mouth. What a gentle way to start! They of course then insisted that dd needed a supplement because of jaundice.
I could go on and on! I'm pregnant now and I find that I have to face so much fear now around childbirth. I'm afraid that I won't be ready emotionally and the same thing will happen again. I no longer know what to do to prepare; the fear just always seems to be there.
|
AUGH, about the talking. I was able to tell my team not to talk, and that was WONDERFUL. we also were allowd to play music. yours is a case where i'd think empowerment with a place like ICAN would be wonderful. or we can do it here! there are some awesome links in the natural c-s thread... i posted my tips there too... so you can come to a place where you can feel that if you do need a c-s, you can manage it better...... then you can feel safer, and maybe let go of some of that pain? we can help, i know it!
one thing i wasnt really prepared for was fighting off the nurses. fortunately, i had an awesome ped who vouched for me, a mom who vowed to grab my son and take him out of the hospital if they even tried to take him from me... even then, we had some awful things that i suffered from for months..... but again-- you can feel empowered by knowing your rights.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawnee That said, I believe that there are things I can do to heal and compensate for the loss. Breastfeeding brought great healing to the babies and me. That's why I'm here, looking for more sources of healing.
|
I wish there was a way to do a sub thread or something, because we should totally start a list of things that have been healing for us! my biggest one-- the "other" c-s, co-sleeping. having him next to me, where he was for so long.... has been AMAZING.
ohkay! that took all of ds's morning nap.... i'll be back later!
: This is a thread for mommas who've had c-sections. To chat, share experiences, talk about how it has been recovering, how it feels months, years later, and how it has changed you, etc.
:
Oh, and actual ICAN meetings are a lot different than the online list. There might be a Chapter near you....or you could start one.
Follow Mothering