How Long is Too Long

[bigislandmama]

So I am 13 days overdue. My midwife does not seem too worried. She will be coming over today today to do an internal and try and get things started. If this does not work she wants to start me on tinctures and then as an absolute LAST resort castor oil :Puke .
So my question is how long is too long to be pregnant. I have not had an ultrasound and so maybe my due date is off, but it couldn't be by much because at all my appointments I am measuring exactly where I should be for that week. When would you start to worry and feel like the baby NEEDS to be born for safety reasons. My midwife said she has never had a mother have to go to the hospital because labor would not start. That is reasurring because I DO NOT want a hospital birth.
I am getting really anxious to meet this baby as I am sure most 40+ week mothers are.

[momto l&a]

I went 3 weeks over with my last.

I did use castor oil, no problems from it. I actually took 2 doses because the first didnt do anything.

Not sure if it actually did anything for starting labor though. I think it was 5+ hours after the castor oil that labor started and it was over a hour later with a beautiful 8+lb baby

Some peopl just bake their babies longer, I detest the stress we get from going "over"

I actually dont tell people anymore the day I am "due".

[alegna]

As long as baby is still moving around (do some kick counts) I would let it be. Babies come when they're ready.

-Angela

[babycatcher01]

You mw is right, you could take herbs even castor oil if they dony work you are not ready. That baby may need to stay in there for some reason and altering that could bring on things that are not wanted. Why do you feel that the baby needs to be born now? What are your conserns and have you shared them with your mw so you can find a solution as to why you are worried?

I know it is hard to wait but our bodies and babies know when it is time.

[OkieMama2three]

I have a friend that went 4 weeks over w/her last baby. MW never blinked an eye. She did finally request that the mamma have a BPP at 43 weeks to make sure everything was okay, but after that, the MW was content to wait it out.

baby will come in good time.

[Full Heart]

Originally Posted by bigislandmama

When would you start to worry and feel like the baby NEEDS to be born for safety reasons.

When do *I* start to worry and feel like the baby needs born? When my instint tells me something isn't right. Based on dates alone I wouldn't be worried. I have had 6 post dates babies and never felt like something was wrong and the baby needed out. But I would def listen to your body and the baby. Do your kick counts too.

[mamaverdi]

I agree with Full Heart. I worry when something feels off. When that humming sound hits my ear. And right then.

I'm not sure I would try herbs and/or castor oil w/o trying talking to the baby, really preparing myself emotionally, getting things in my life cleared up, telling the baby things are ready. I would even ask a close friend if I seemed clear...and ready for the baby.

[Arwyn]

Originally Posted by Full Heart

When do *I* start to worry and feel like the baby needs born? When my instint tells me something isn't right. Based on dates alone I wouldn't be worried. I have had 6 post dates babies and never felt like something was wrong and the baby needed out. But I would def listen to your body and the baby. Do your kick counts too.

:

And I wouldn't do "internals" (membrane stripping, it sounds like?) or castor oil unless there was a specific indication for induction. And probably not even then.

[erin_brycesmom]

I definitely agree about following your instincts but based on the extensive research I have done on post dates, I personally would start to worry at 43 weeks. Both of my pregnancies have reached 42 weeks (or beyond). While I believe instincts are very important, there are true risks involved with going post dates. This subject is near and dear to my heart. Don't let comments like "your baby will come when he/she is ready" cloud your judgment. Not every baby comes in time to have a safe arrival .

~Erin

[FreeThinkinMama]

Originally Posted by erin_brycesmom

I definitely agree about following your instincts but based on the extensive research I have done on post dates, I personally would start to worry at 43 weeks. Both of my pregnancies have reached 42 weeks (or beyond). While I believe instincts are very important, there are true risks involved with going post dates. This subject is near and dear to my heart. Don't let comments like "your baby will come when he/she is ready" cloud your judgment. Not every baby comes in time to have a safe arrival .

~Erin

I agree. I think most babies come when they're ready and it disgusts me that OB's start talking induction as soon as moms hit 40 weeks, as if the due date is an eviction date instead of an estimation that could be inaccurate anyway.
I wouldn't start to become concerned until 42 weeks, but that's because of studies I've read. There are cases where overdue babies have bad outcomes so I don't think that possibility should be completely brushed off. Still, I would question my due date, my periods are so irregular. Fundal height measurements can be off. At 42 weeks I would probably go for the membrane stripping, herbs (not sure about the cohoshes but others), and castor oil. Of course that would be after I had tried things like walking, nipple stimulation, sex etc. JMO of course, I think everyone should do their own research and come to their own conclusions about what's best

[BelgianSheepDog]

I started to have really strong intuitions of something bad happening, of NEEDING to go into labor asap at the end of 39 weeks. Not just "I'm sick of being pregnant" but actual "I have a bad feeling about this." I don't know what it meant, but it was unignorable. I'd been having the "done with pregnancy" feeling for a couple weeks and this was different. The baby got here at 40w2d and despite having a heart defect, she was fine. The placenta was fine. There was a partial velamentous insertion of the cord, though, and I wonder if my intuition had to do with that--like "now's the time for her to come out, if you wait something's going to happen with that cord." Impossible to say.

Just telling that story to let you know it's ok to listen to your instincts even if you're not 2 or 3 weeks overdue. If I hadn't gone into labor when I did I was going to do something about it. It was a strong, strong instinct.

[saratchka]

Originally Posted by FreeThinkinMama

I wouldn't start to become concerned until 42 weeks, but that's because of studies I've read. There are cases where overdue babies have bad outcomes so I don't think that possibility should be completely brushed off. ... At 42 weeks I would probably go for the membrane stripping, herbs (not sure about the cohoshes but others), and castor oil. Of course that would be after I had tried things like walking, nipple stimulation, sex etc. JMO of course, I think everyone should do their own research and come to their own conclusions about what's best

:

I know many say that the baby will come when ready and not to worry, but I was a little worried when DD was 10 days late. She had no real problems to speak of, just some meconium and that wasn't thick, but I was a little concerned nonetheless. My reading showed the risks rising after 42 weeks, so I'd be reluctant to birth at home later than that, myself, but you have to decide your own comfort level.

If I'm late again, I'll start the milder stuff (evening primrose oil, red raspberry leaf tea, etc) at 40 weeks and just before 42 weeks I'll move on to more serious stuff, like membrane stripping and castor oil. I can't get comfortable with cohosh, myself. I'm very sure of my due date, and I can't see myself delivering at home much past the 42 week mark.

But, again, you have to look at the risks and decide where, for you, the risk of staying home outweighs the risks of the hospital. That tipping point is different for everyone, I think.

[bigislandmama]

Thank you all for your kind and reassuring words. After talking to my midwife yesterday we have decided that we are comfortable with saying that my due date is off. I am not having any stong feelings of anything being wrong and am actually feeling a lot more calm after talking to my midwife. My periods were very irregular and she said that there is no way that I was ovulating on a 28 day cycle. I am feeling okay with letting the baby wait until it is ready. We are going to wait until tomorrow to meet and check on things and then go from there.
Thanks again for all the responses.