big changes with more than 2?

[emmaline]

we're awaiting the arrival of kid #3 soon and a few friends with >2 have welcomed me to the club, saying that life gets very different from now on

OK I'm having quite a struggle thinking about fitting a new baby into the rest of our life but is there a magical difference beyond two kids? am I about to rocket into some chaotic realm I could never have imagined?? it's not like we'll have 3 under 3 or something, our other kids are 12 and 5

[Jillby]

Hi! I now have 3 and the biggest change for me was that every thing takes longer.getting dressed,feeding everyone,getting in the car.... and so on. my first 2 are close in age(6 and 5) and they just love little Quinn(almost 5 months).they have had to adjust a little,as to waiting for some things and not running screaming into the room where she is sleeping.but they are doing great with it I think.I too have heard lots of horror stories about the magical #3 and so far nothing to bad has happened.Maybe when she starts talking and walking around?? love to hear what others have to say!

[lucina3]

I had 3 children in 2 years 9 months. I found the hardest adjustment to go from 1 to 2... going from 2 to 3 was a lot easier for me. By then I figured a "method" for a lot of things, was a lot less stressed and just overall it went a lot better! And, ironically #2 was the "calm" "easygoing" baby and #1 and #3 were (are) the high-need ones!

[emmaline]

I figured it would make a big difference depending on what the new baby's temperament is compared to the older ones

I'm glad you folks have no horror stories to tell me!

my biggest adjustment was to #1! it took me years to realise how difficult it was to do all the necessary for him - I just did what seemed to be required - but he did have alot of health issues which are mostly ongoing, and he was quite a handful in that respect. Only ds2 being so healthy made me realise how tough it is with a kid who has chronic and potentially life threatening health problems

also I figure now dh and I are well adjusted to family life! we've thrashed out a lot of stuff over the years and are both much better at being mum and dad as well as our other roles in life

[mama2mygirls]

Originally posted by Jillby
Hi! I now have 3 and the biggest change for me was that every thing takes longer.getting dressed,feeding everyone,getting in the car.... and so on.

i have to agree. it does take a little longer. my first two out 16 months apart a 5 yr old and a soon to be 4 yr old, and Ella will be 4 months on the 10th

the girls are pretty loud at times, but Ella usually sleeps thru it, i think she heard them quite a bit in utero before she was born:

it's starting to get warm here and the older girls are outside more with either dh or myself, one of us is still inside with ella, still to windy to be out, plus she's still is only 4 months old.but that will only last a short period of time, they grow so fast!
before we both would be outside with them.

i changed how i clean too, other than sweeping, i do almost all my cleaning when everyone is in bed.So during the day when Ella is taking a nap , i make it craft time or reading a book time with the girls,something just for them. since when Ella is awake it seems like i'm always breastfeeding, or entertaining her
the girls don't act like they are "put out" that Ella is now a pretty big part of my center of attention, but i do make a very strong effort to make time just for them.
my hubby takes them on a "daddy date" he takes them out to a restaurant and have a special time just with them. and i have left Ella with daddy and us girls have gone out, and of course we have all gone out as a family. now that it's getting warmer it will be easier to all go out, i didn't take ella out during the winter months to cold and we had a very hard winter.

congrats on your #3 on the way.

[mcimom]

hmmm, my input may not be relevant as your older kids are well...older

anywho, i found going from 2-3 much easier than going from 1-2 b/c you are already used to multi-tasking and subdividing your attention and the other 2 have each other while you're "busy w/baby" like nursing and feeding and changing, but heck w/your 2 you can have them help w/that! my older 2 are younger - 2 and 4yo - and they play so well together. that made it much easier being pg and bringing home baby. when dd2 was born, i was dd1's main playmate and that made it hard when i had no energy. now dd1 and 2 have each other when i'm worn out from dd3.

[DebraBaker]

Having a baby with 12 and 5YO siblings is much different from having three kids close together.

It will be an adjuctment because it has been so long since you have had a baby. This is adjust to a baby type of thing rather than something inherent in having a third child.

The only thing I remember that really *bugged* me is the mentality that the "perfect" American family is that with two children...."Win a family trip" trip is for *four*, the "family discount pack"....you guessed it, for four. Recipes are usually for four (although with my pigs I'd need to double it even if there were only four)

If you can get past that societal garbage having a third (or more) is fine and it most particularly fine when you have older children.

Debra Baker