Rockin' Robin!! - Page 2

[True Blue]

Oooooh I would totally buy the business cards...do it!

[firstkid4me]

Originally Posted by Sustainer

If I complained about someone and they sent me a dessert I would feel like they were apologizing to me or trying to make it up to me.

I have to say I agree with you Alice. Even though the op was probably still nursing at the table, the complainer and her family probably saw it as a "sorry, I'll remember to bring a blanket next time!" gesture instead of a "eat this pie so you can stfu!" gesture.

[Sustainer]

Originally Posted by lissabob

I'm wondering why you would be mad that the op would not have to pay for either of the desserts?

I'm not. It's just that I wouldn't want the complainer to get a free dessert from *anyone*. You're right, though, it was already on the OP's bill, so at that point it's better for the OP's table not to have to pay for it. It's just that I was imagining the restaurant's rationale to be, "okay, the restaurant will provide a free dessert to each table, since they were *both* bothered." :

[Unoppressed MAMA Q]

Originally Posted by Sustainer

I'm not. It's just that I wouldn't want the complainer to get a free dessert from *anyone*. You're right, though, it was already on the OP's bill, so at that point it's better for the OP's table not to have to pay for it. It's just that I was imagining the restaurant's rationale to be, "okay, the restaurant will provide a free dessert to each table, since they were *both* bothered." :

i really really appreciate the spirit of the dessert, but i can see how, unless you also thoroughly explained it to the complainers who don't comprehend how babies eat...(ok, i'm kind of tongue in cheek here), well, i can see room for confusion...

[firstkid4me]

Originally Posted by Sustainer

I'm not. It's just that I wouldn't want the complainer to get a free dessert from *anyone*. You're right, though, it was already on the OP's bill, so at that point it's better for the OP's table not to have to pay for it. It's just that I was imagining the restaurant's rationale to be, "okay, the restaurant will provide a free dessert to each table, since they were *both* bothered." :

It's almost as if the manager was thanking the op for doing HIS job.

[Sustainer]

Originally Posted by firstkid4me

It's almost as if the manager was thanking the op for doing HIS job.

Exactly. If someone said "let me pay for dessert for the person who complained about you breastfeeding," I would be ticked off at them. And then if someone else said, "Let ME pay for the complainer's dessert" I wouldn't be able to help feeling a little ticked at them too. It's like everyone's falling over each other to pay for the complainer's dessert, you know? My concern is that the restaurant's motivation wasn't to do something for the OP but rather to be the ones who did something for the complainer. Especially when you consider everything the restaurant had done and said up to that point.

[kaspirant]

Oy Vey!!!!

I am a die-hard Lactivist. IMO...Education is the best Activism. The people are ignorant...plain and simple. If someone is MAD at us enough to complain there is no way they will LISTEN to us if we try to talk to them.

We bought the dessert for the *complainers*
1. because it made us feel better in a crappy situation.
2. Because it opened the door for us to educate if they took us up on the offer.
3. Because it makes us the *bigger* person.

First of all...as many of you know it sucks to be singled out and to have to explain that you know your rights and you intend to uphold them. It is bothersome to have to *pause* family dinner time and explain to an ignorant SOB that they are wrong. It made us feel AMAZING to give the dessert to the complainers because we knew we were right. To us...that is what matters the most. I totally agree with the pp who said "killing them with kindness" Seriously that was what it was all about.

Opening the door for us to educate....If they are mad at us, they aren't going to talk to us at all...not nicely of course. However, by giving them dessert...if they came to say *thanks* we then have an opening to tell them what and why we do what we do. A gracious listener is so much easier to talk to than an angry one \

Lastly...I hope and pray that I can teach my son that no matter what other people do we can uphold our dignity and grace by being the bigger person...even when the other one is so blatantly WRONG. It's a lesson in humility

I am so glad my DF did what he did. It was fun and exciting...the one lady who was the most upset refused to eat even one bite and we weren't provided the opportunity to talk to them because with 2 babies ... we ended up having to cut our chat time short.

I hear what others are saying about how they would feel and I respect it...just wanted to add in my 2 cents

[Sustainer]

I didn't mean to make a big deal out of it. It was meant to be just one little comment about how I would feel in the same situation and then it somehow grew into a whole conversation. I certainly was not questioning your lactivism. The way you talked to the manager and the waitress shows what a great lactivist you are. I was not suggesting that you should have talked to the customers who complained about you. What I would have done is completely ignore them. But again, that's just ME. I'm not saying that it's what you should have done, nor am I criticizing what you did do. I'm glad it made you feel better to order the dessert. You were difinitely the bigger person in the situation. What bothers me the most about what happened to you is the things that the employees in the restaurant said to you. That's what I'd really like this thread to be about. I think that action needs to be taken against Red Robin.

[kaspirant]

Originally Posted by Sustainer

I didn't mean to make a big deal out of it. It was meant to be just one little comment about how I would feel in the same situation and then it somehow grew into a whole conversation. I certainly was not questioning your lactivism. The way you talked to the manager and the waitress shows what a great lactivist you are. I was not suggesting that you should have talked to the customers who complained about you. What I would have done is completely ignore them. But again, that's just ME. I'm not saying that it's what you should have done, nor am I criticizing what you did do. I'm glad it made you feel better to order the dessert. You were difinitely the bigger person in the situation. What bothers me the most about what happened to you is the things that the employees in the restaurant said to you. That's what I'd really like this thread to be about. I think that action needs to be taken against Red Robin.

After reading and listening I agree...I will be calling RR about the incident in question. I wouldn't have done it any other way though. Thanks for clarifying.

[jackson's mama]

Originally Posted by Sustainer

If I complained about someone and they sent me a dessert I would feel like they were apologizing to me or trying to make it up to me.

Unless they didn't stop the 'offending' behavior, then I might feel like they were telling me to shove it up my ***!

[laurdsed]

Kudos to you, kaspirant! You were the bigger person. I hope I have that much grace and dignity if I am ever faced with the same situation. I hope not, though.

Laurel