Hi again, Problems again

[Nikki39293]

Alex came and asked to be able to see his doctor right after christmas, he said his penis was hurting again. So, we went... His doctor is a foreskin friendly doctor, and I researched him very well before i chose him.

Apparently, alex was not washing under his foreskin and some months ago it got very sore. He never told anyone. Apparently during healing from being sore, its now adhered to his glans again, and he can not retract it again. His foreskin friendly doctor said that its not a natural adhesion, it healed adhered and he may need surgery to fix it, and keep his foreskin. He said that there's a 50/50 chance he may need circumcised regardless of how much we, and he, wants him to remain intact. We asked him why he did not clean himself like he was taught, and he said he just doesnt like to touch his penis at all, and it was smelly when he tried to clean it before so he just didnt clean it.

We generally took everyone's advice here and just "leave it alone", but that.. really didnt work out too well... *Arg*

What do I do now?

[Yoshua]

Originally Posted by Nikki39293

Alex came and asked to be able to see his doctor right after christmas, he said his penis was hurting again. So, we went... His doctor is a foreskin friendly doctor, and I researched him very well before i chose him.

Apparently, alex was not washing under his foreskin and some months ago it got very sore. He never told anyone. Apparently during healing from being sore, its now adhered to his glans again, and he can not retract it again. His foreskin friendly doctor said that its not a natural adhesion, it healed adhered and he may need surgery to fix it, and keep his foreskin. He said that there's a 50/50 chance he may need circumcised regardless of how much we, and he, wants him to remain intact. We asked him why he did not clean himself like he was taught, and he said he just doesnt like to touch his penis at all, and it was smelly when he tried to clean it before so he just didnt clean it.

We generally took everyone's advice here and just "leave it alone", but that.. really didnt work out too well... *Arg*

What do I do now?

The doctor didnt offer a steroid creme?

How old is your son?


Your son should practice stretching excersizes to try to break the adhesions himself from what I have read.

Steroid cream, sorry the name escapes me at the moment, helps breaking down adhesions and helps in stretching it.



I don't know how badly it is adheared, but if it requires cutting to fix, and if he wants to 'keep' his foreskin, he is going to have to MAKE SURE it doesn't re attach during the healilng process.


Basically, when it is broken down, skin it up as often as possible and walk around the bedroom naked. Lock the door.


Dont let 2 open wounds heal together, that is what causes adheasions.

[pdx.mothernurture]

What is your "foreskin friendly" doctor basing his 50/50 chance of circumcision statistic on? Could the doctor be suggesting a high liklihood of circumcision as a threat to intimidate your son into better hygiene?

Has your son been diagnosed with *anything* except an adhesion?

Have any alternatives to surgery (like gentle stretching exercises or steroid cream) been suggested or offered?

It surprises me that a teenage boy's excuse for not washing his his penis (for months?) is that he doesn't like touching his penis at all.

The 'leave it alone' care guidelines are for non-retractable, pre-adolescent infants and boys. Once he can retract, he should be doing the "Retract, Rinse, Replace" when he showers/baths.

Jen

[pdx.mothernurture]

Originally Posted by Yoshua

Steroid cream, sorry the name escapes me at the moment, helps breaking down adhesions and helps in stretching it.

Betamethasone.

Jen

[Yoshua]

Originally Posted by pdx.mothernurture

Betamethasone.

Jen

Thanks Jen

[Yoshua]

Something that you should know, and something that a young man would be too embarrassed to talk about is this....



Vigorous masterbation without lubrication can causing burns on the glans and shaft. I am assuming that a person with a foreskin could in theory burn the mucousal skin too.


I wouldn't ask him if that is the case, but I would let him know that stretching could fix it if it HAPPENS to be the case.


Also tell him to use some kind of lubricant for masturbating. However if he uses the lotion I used in highschool I am assuming he will need to take a shower afterwards to clean out the foreskin.



Last note on masturbating.


Using Shower soap to masterbate is a mistake. It doesn't lubricate, it dries out the skin and actually makes burning yourself easier.




I will deny any questions you have as to how I have attained this knowledge, just know that any young man in highschool will use any liquid you leave available in the bathroom to 'see' what it feels like.


Hide your lotion unless you want it to be of communal use.

[pdx.mothernurture]

Some background info/previous threads:

Need help 11yo with infected foreskin

Its Sore -- again.

It came lose!

DS wants to talk with an adult male about his problems

Dr told us to use Hydrocortizone

[Nikki39293]

thanks for the summary of my previous posts on the issue, yes it has been a continuing problem with Alex.. I've more or less taken peoples advice and let him come to me when he has a complaint.

to the person who asked, He's 12.

[kldliam]

Jen: The 'leave it alone' care guidelines are for non-retractable, pre-adolescent infants and boys. Once he can retract, he should be doing the "Retract, Rinse, Replace" when he showers/baths.

Definitely!


It sounds like this is just a lesson hard-learned. Hopefully he now understands that rinsing under the foreskin is not optional. I am a little confused about how his poor hygiene led to adhessions?

It sounds like he never really understood the importance of washing down there or the consequences of not doing it. Fortunately he gets it now and hopefully will be on the track to good hygiene soon!

[AXEius]

Originally Posted by kldliam

Definitely!


It sounds like this is just a lesson hard-learned. Hopefully he now understands that rinsing under the foreskin is not optional. I am a little confused about how his poor hygiene led to adhessions?

It sounds like he never really understood the importance of washing down there or the consequences of not doing it. Fortunately he gets it now and hopefully will be on the track to good hygiene soon!

I too am confused and concerned about the doctor linking not washing to adhesions. Adhesions have nothing to do with washing under the foreskin or even infection , unless the infection was so bad his entire penis was a raw, open sore and it healed back together. even then circumcision wouldnt be required. It doesnt sound like this doctor is intact friendly at all.

[glongley]

Is is really re-adhered? Or has the foreskin just tightened back up a bit, not allowing retraction as before? This can occur if there is a low grade inflammatory process going on, like a yeast infection. Causes enough swelling than the foreskin can't stretch as before. Rinsing underneath regularly should prevent future problems, but maybe he needs some topical yeast/fungal cream in the meantime?

Gillian

[kaylee18]

Originally Posted by Nikki39293

thanks for the summary of my previous posts on the issue, yes it has been a continuing problem with Alex.. I've more or less taken peoples advice and let him come to me when he has a complaint.

to the person who asked, He's 12.

It sounds to me as if the continuing problem is that physicians don't understand normal development and how to differentiate normal development from infections and problems. Hence never having done a culture to see if there is a bacterial or fungal infection. Which should be treated with an antibiotic or antifungal medication, respectively. Betamethasone, being a steroid, can make fungus (as in yeast) grow phenomonally quickly, so it's important to identify the actual cause of the problem (rather than threatening amputation!!! ) and apply the appropriate treatment.

I am crossing my fingers that this child does not in fact need any kind of surgery, because I give it a 99% probability that any surgery on his penis will result in removal of his foreskin whether he needs it or not.

In all likelihood, once he gets over the ick factor and starts manually stretching it regularly, it will stretch out and lose the adhesions, whether they are the natural synechia or secondary adhesions. But the pain indicates there may be an infection (because of bacteria, not because of a foreskin; there isn't any statistical correlation between UTI and intact status among boys of his age). Or there may be some abnormal tightness, etc., that may be resolved with use of steroid cream. Employing surgery at this point seems rather like employing a sledgehammer to put the cap back on a beer bottle.

[Sijae]

Ok, am i the only one that is not convinced that frequent rinsing under the foreskin is totally necessary? I could be off-base here as I don't have one myself but I'm going off of the logic that the penis is a self-service body area like the vagina and washing it while culturally desirable is not necessary for health?

I have a 12 year old son and he honestly doesn't bathe all that often and I generally don't pester him about it : I have mentioned once or twice in his life that if his foreskin is comfortably retractible it would be a good idea to rinse with water in the bath or shower but I honestly doubt he actually does it unless he's playing around with it.

So here's what I'm getting at: It doesn't make sense to me that adhesions would be cause by simply not washing. It seems like not washing would simply result in a build up of smegma and the glans would be perfectly lubricated to prevent any kind of friction. It seems more likely to me off the top of my head that this would be caused more by some sort of injury or tearing from say excessive use of soap and/or masturbation. Just some thoughts really. At this point I'd say no matter how foreskin friendly you think this doctor is I'd take his advice with a grain of salt. He should recommend steroid cream and stretching before surgery. And if Alex doesn't want to touch his penis then why does he need this adhesion to go away? Is it infected? does he have a yeast problem? those can be taken care of through better nutrition and medicines. Otherwise I don't see why an adhesion is a problem all by itself. If the problem is that it's painful because he wants to touch it (i.e masturbate) then I would try the non-surgical route and a lot of efforts at better communication and trust before allowing a knife anywhere near him.

hth,
Laura

[BamaDude]

Originally Posted by Sijae

Ok, am i the only one that is not convinced that frequent rinsing under the foreskin is totally necessary? I could be off-base here as I don't have one myself but I'm going off of the logic that the penis is a self-service body area like the vagina and washing it while culturally desirable is not necessary for health?

Erm...how to put this?

Smegma is like body odor in that some guys naturally produce a lot, while other guys produce almost none at all. While neither is a threat to one's health and both are perfectly normal, natural things, both can also be offensive if left unchecked.

[DocsNemesis]

Ok, I was reading that third post and I am thinking...hmmm....he accidentally pulled back his foreskin hard and ripped it back, right? Then it still had a few adheasions and was bleeding a bit. I'm assuming those adheasons went away? Anyway, maybe he actually did do some harm when that happened. Not like permanent harm or anything, but if the foreskin wasnt really ready to be pushed back like that, coupled with his not pulling it back to wash every day, it is very well possible that his foreskin readheared simply because it wasnt ready to be retracted to begin with. Does that make sense? It happens (all too often) with babies too. They get forcibly retracted and then it just readhears if its been left alone.
Everyone should either leave the poor kids penis alone (except him, I find it odd that he wouldnt want to touch his own penis too....he seems comfortable with others seeing his parts, but does he know that it is OK for him to touch himself down there? For gosh sakes, my ds is only 6 and plays with himself all the time!!! ) or offer him some sort of steriod cream and teach gentle stretching. But he definately needs to learn to clean Boys!

[eepster]

Even though your Dr is foreskin friendly it doesn't nesseceraly mean he is foreskin knowledgeable, IYKWIM. I really dought that poor hygeine is the root of your DS's problemes. If poor hygiene frequently lead to adhessions half the teenage boys in europe would be getting them since teenage boy are notoriusly lazy about hygiene.

It sounds like your son need an adult male with a foreskin (I only skimmed through the background links but I get the feeling that the guy you call John is circ'd) that he could talk to. I have no idea how you would go about finding one you can trust though. I guess I'm lucky if DS needs to talk about this kind of thing It shouldn't be a problem since in our family more of the male relatives are intact than circ'd.

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

#1 insist that he be given a steroid cream. Tell him how to apply and how he has to gently stretch on his foreskin. Revamp knows all about this so you may want to PM him.

He can gently break down the attachments himself given enough time and effort.

If by some slime chance there is one that wont let go then he can have a simple procedure with local anesthetic to "snip" the place the is adheared. Just like if he had been circed and they snipped a skin bridge.

I am with others who dont think washing under it is the problem. There are many men out there who have never washed under there foreskins and never had a problem. Some men go all their life and never retract and do just fine.

Washing is good so it dosnt smell yes of course but blaming adhesions on it falls under the catagory of boys/men being not smart enough to clean. : and one of the major reasons that circ happens in the first place.

[Nikki39293]

Why do I need to continually have to look for different doctors? I'm sick of it. So far this man has seemingly been perfect and followed nearly all the general rules I've seen here. What the doctor explained to me yesterday, and I asked to verify my understanding was correct, is that his skin has reattached to the head, over most of the area. Similar to getting a cut, and having it heal together. I've not seen this yet myself, as I've tried to not look at him there over the past 8-12 months.

Sijae: He's horrid with baths. I have to force him to take a shower in the mornings before school, and generally thats only once or twice a week. The best ways I can get him to bathe is to tell him he cant do something he wants to do, until he gets in the shower. Then he gets himself wet, and im fairly sure he doesnt wash much. Its quite annoying but I dont rag on him about it yet, as he doesnt seem to have much, if any noticeable body odor.

[glongley]

<<What the doctor explained to me yesterday, and I asked to verify my understanding was correct, is that his skin has reattached to the head, over most of the area.>>

How can the doctor tell if it's attached over most of the head of the penis, if it doesn't retract????

Gillian

[pigpokey]

If circ (wound) adhesions in babies release on their own (based on massive drop in adhesion rate in increasing age groups w/o intervention), wouldn't this adhesion likely release on its own if he doesn't mess with it beyond what he wants to do himself?

If he were my child I would want to know what the possible downsides of waiting would be.

I'm wondering if he said he does not like to touch his penis as one of those not so subtle cover stories older children tell when they are embarrassed by something that they are doing and don't want anyone to know about. (Kiss a boy? Ewww gross!)