I am a housekeeping failure, so I'll have to answer for both myself and DH otherwise it will seem like nothing ever gets done.
Wash your sheets? DH does this every week or two. Depends on the dogs getting it dirty.
Mop? Whenever we spill something. Otherwise about 1X per week in the kitchen (DH). Every 6 months in the living room & hallway...
Clean the bathroom? Me: 2x per year major cleaning DH: 1-2X per week, vacuum, clean out sink, etc.
Grocery shop? Between the two of us about 3x per week for fresh veggies, fish, etc. I go to the farm down the road 1-2x per week for milk & eggs. I do a major co-op order for staples 1x per month.
Dust? 1X per month when DH asks me to, or whenever the Queen, Pope or MIL is coming, or whenever we have extra remodel-related dust.
Wash your favorite pair of jeans? Every 3 wearings or so they go into the basket. DH does 9/10 loads of laundry.
Vacuum? DH vacuums the whole house 1x per week. The living room/kitchen gets vacuumed (by DH) pretty much every day due to dog hair. I vacuum every 6 months or so when DH asks me to.
Poor DH

But I do all the cooking!