Husband catching the baby???

[AngieB]

This is my fourth and final pregnancy and birth and I've been thinking I would like my DH to catch the baby this time. The Midwife would be there in case she was needed, but I really want dh to do the catching. I kinda brought it up with him and he didn't seem very interested. He's a Volunteer Fire fighter and has some first response training so I think he could handle it. Has anyone else Dh done this, did they enjoy it or was it to much stress for them? How did the midwife take the idea? I don't know if it's worth pushing the issue or just let it go and be happy with a simple homebirth.

[velcromom]

Hi Angie - I asked our midwife if dh could possibly catch and she said he could but that it would be a "four handed" catch with her assisting him. Hmph. He hasn't dropped any of our kids so far in all his parenting experiences, I think I can trust him to catch a baby. I haven't actually asked him if he'd like to do that though so can't comment on his take on the whole idea. I think he'd be glad he did it, once everything was over.

[forthebest]

Hi Mama, my ex-partner 'caught' my baby and had no problem tho he had to quickly realise baby was a bit slippy and get a grip! He more kinda recieved baby and I asked him to just gently lower her onto the towel I had placed there. I was kneeling down so was pretty close to the ground. I uc'ed so there was no midwife to ask what we could or could'nt do and the more I hear about some midwives and medical staff opinions the more ridiculous they seem, the pp says it so much better. In my experience of birth it seems to encourage a good bonding if the father does get more involved like catching baby, my ex thanked me for asking him to do it, it really seemed to make him very happy, my first birth was in hospital and my then partner wasn't interested in catching baby, in fact the midwife made a point of handing baby to him before me which I think was out of order.

[witchbaby]

we planned a homebirth with our son and my husband wanted to catch him. our midwives were very enthusiastic about it and told him they'd make sure he was "in position" when the big moment came.
unfortunatly, we transferred to the hospital and of course he didn't get to catch-- he didn't even get to tell me the sex (one of about 587542548642541 annoying things that occurred). :

[kristen1978]

Hi girls -- just my 2 cents, here . . . .

As someone who catches other people's babies, I can tell you that I dearly wish more partners would ask to do the honors. It's just such a special opportunity!! We will do the perineal massage as the pushing stage progresses (or show partner how to do it for mom) and then check for cord after the head is born, and let the partner step in. If there was ever an issue of course we'd take over, but there hardly ever is!

Even if you have hired a midwife, this is still YOUR birth. If it is important to you, insist that your husband catches his baby!

[momto l&a]

My dh wants to unfortunately they pop out too quick for anybody to catch them. He always cuts the cord and that kind of stuff.

He will get to try again as we are having #4 in May.

[caedmyn]

My DH DIDN'T want to catch--he said, "What are we paying the midwife for?" I said, "So you can catch the baby if you want to!" But when I was pushing the midwife asked him to catch the baby and he did (I think she knew I wanted him to catch DD). Later he said he was glad he caught her.

[JanetF]

I had no MW in the end and DP caught the human cannonball that was our daughter and handed her up to me. She was born in water. I don't think his training as an accountant prevented his ability to catch babies.

[saratchka]

My DH doesn't want to catch. He doesn't want to cut the cord. He hates all things to do with bodily functions & fluids. And he gets shaky and nervous in situations that involve such "squishy things," like birth. If he weren't so in love with his babies he wouldn't even want to be in the room! I don't feel the need to push him to do any of these things. He bonded beautifully with DD despite the hospital birth setting, and I have no doubt that he'll bond even better with this new baby because we'll be home.

Now, depending on what position I'm in at delivery, I may catch the baby myself, but I know DH won't do it.

If it's important to you, I'd definitely have a real heart-to-heart with your partner about it. But I don't see any value in pushing someone to do something like that if they're not entirely comfortable with it. JMO, of course!

[teachinmaof3]

My last was a semi-planned UC. I wanted dh to catch but the plan was to have the mw here just in case. As it turned out, it was just dh and I and he caught.

I was in the birth pool on my knees, leaning against the side. I had been checking myself as the water bag came down, broke, then as ds' descended. I cupped my hand over myself as he was crowning so that I paid close attention to how I was pushing. Then when I knew the next push would birth his head, I asked dh if he was ready. He was behind me and caught ds in the water. He admitted later that he was FREAKED OUT!! Those couple of seconds in the water ds was limp and obivously still a little blue. Once ds was out of the water he pinked up and was screaming...then dh said he relaxed. When he shared that with me I of course knew it was normal but I guess he didn't realize that.

It was a beautiful moment that I will never forget!! It's an amazing feeling knowing that it was just dh and I helping to bring this life into the world in the same room he was conceived in. Amazing.

[bamamom]

grrr

well, threads like this make me have a love/hate relationship with midwives who say it will be a "four handed catch"...ummm daddy's not an idiot, alright?? Show him how to catch , and back up lady.

GRR

now, nothing personal against midwives, mine were very hands off. Fine with anyone catching. no big deal.

In response, my dh caught my ds...it was a UA, he did fine . I gave him instructions, he kept the baby from sustaining head injuries on the way out. Good enough for me!

[pamamidwife]

I think that many people think there needs to be some fancy hand maneuvers to catch a baby. Literally, you hold your hands out and receive the baby!

I think that once people know this, partners are much more likely to be open to receiving their baby.

I agree with Bama. Catching is not the same as going in and manually removing a placenta. Shouldn't the first hands to touch a baby be without gloves - and the skin of someone that honestly loves them and made them??

[palamala]

:
My husband caught our third baby. The baby opened his eyes on the way out and looked straight at his daddy :
I was on my knees so I missed it, but, I'm so glad they had that experience. They have a very strong bond.

happy birthing!

[~Heyokha~]

Having HB in april. Dp will be catching baby- we are so excited. My MW said that she only wants to help the head ease through and check for cord on neck then she will back away.

[3-StarSystem]

Originally Posted by bamamom

grrr

well, threads like this make me have a love/hate relationship with midwives who say it will be a "four handed catch"...ummm daddy's not an idiot, alright?? Show him how to catch , and back up lady.

GRR

I feel the same way. When we emphasized to our midwife that my DH wanted to recieve the baby we got such an "Oh, that's nice but don't feel bad if it doesn't work out." (Not direct quote but pretty much the gist!) response that was very frustrating. (Along with a lot of other gems.)

My DH is very knowledgable when it comes to what to look for with the positioning and cord and he's read everything imaginable to train himself for this act. He so wants to be a part of this birth and it felt like we're having his wishes and power negated left right and center. SOMEBODY is going to be catching that baby, why not him? He's well aware with what to do if there's a shoulder dystocia situation/nuchal cord or hand even and I trust HIM more than anyone else in that sort of situation. TMI, but he's done the blue baby resuscitation deal before (Not at birth.) and I have complete confidence in him to remain calm whatever may arise whereas I get more of a sense of panic from the midwives.

This has been a large factor in our decision to UC. I feel that he's as much a part of this birth as I am and his part largely begins when this baby crowns. Unfortunately a lot of his part in the birth would be taken away if a midwife were present. (We've not had good reactions at all from the midwives when asked about being "hands off" according to our wishes.)

[Samjm]

DH caught DD, handed her to me where we discovered her gender together with no announcements. We'll do the same this time too.

And this was in a hospital, with an OB too.

[BumbleBena]

It is *vitally important* to my DH that he be the one to catch the baby. We've discussed it with the midwives, and they're very supportive of it, and made it clear they will be as near or as far away as we want them to be. DH really wants to be the first person to touch his baby.

[Bella'smamma]

I love the fact that my dp proudly says that he caught both of his children. People look at him with awe and admiration, we need more men like him!

[sarah_bella1050]

My dh caught our dd and he says that it was one of the greatest moments of his life. He can't wait to catch this one. Both time I told our midwives they had no problem with it whatsoever.

[habibekindheart]

My husband has caught our last 3. With the first one, the midwife taught him how to catch with one of our kids' stuffed bunnies. He was a little nervous, but when Boo was born, he caught her and broke down in tears. He says it was one of the most powerful moments of his life. He's caught 2 more since and we wouldn't have it any other way.