So I have a twin sister, we are the oldest in our family, she is just finishing nursing school and is married but no kids. She has been to both of my deliveries. My 1st, Mckayla, was a very complicated, very intervened labor that didn't have to be had I been more educated and with a better provider (ie: not an OB 
). Pit, Epi x 3, Water broken, 3 hours of pushing, forcepts. Did get a healthy baby though! My second, Talmage, was a natural labor in the hospital with a midwife. Wonderful! Painful, but it was labor, and was a great experience. Anyway, we are very close, but on pretty different plains as far as the whole childbirth thing goes. Here's an email conversation we just had that left me very empowered and proud after I read though it. Anyway, enjoy! Oh and please don't bash her. She means well, she doesn't insult me or anything, just doesn't get it yet and thinks I'm crazy!
So my son's 1st birthday is tomorrow, so that's where this first comment from her comes from:
Can you believe its been a year since you spent 4 hours in misery and had the sweet little guy?
My response:
Oh don't make it sound so bad! I was actually thinking about that today though. Really only the last hour at most was truly really bad. The couple hours before that was difficult and painful, but managable. I didn't flip out till the very end ;-) I'd totally do it again
Her response:
I know you'll do it again but are you sure you don't want to be a little more comfortable the next time? Your still gonna push them out just the same, just not so painful of a memory. And you can't tell me that it wasn't excrutiating pain that last hour... I think its awesome that you just carry them for 9 months and get them out alive!
My response:
I've been through the epidural route with Mckayla so I've had both experiences. I was pretty miserable with Mckayla the last 3 hours, painfullly aching legs, throwing up, having to be told what my own body was doing, having a catheter and being stuck in bed not being able to move my lower body. Not to mention the drugs that were in my body. I know they'll tell you they are pretty safe but I would rather not take the chance and expose my baby or myself to any dangers from the drug or the procedure. Beyond that, interfering with a normal labor (and labor is a normal event, not an illness or condition) with pit or rupturing membranes or pain meds only multiplies the chances of more interventions happening like heart rate issues for mom and baby which can equal more drugs to regulate, slowed or stalled labor (not every time, I realize this, but a lot), more breathing difficulties and a sleepy baby sometimes for the baby, an IV, continuous EFM meaning you're stuck in bed which is not the best way for the baby to descend.
If the baby doesn't descend well as it would if mom were in an upright or hands and knees postition, basically anything but lying in bed even semireclined, that is what leads to long hard pushing, forcepts or vacuum, and ultimately C-sections.
I do admit that the last hour was excruciating at times, not the whole hour, mostly the 30min or so during transition before pushing.
I do not at all have a painful or bad memory of my labor. I have a better memmory of Talm's than Mckayla's. Talm's labor hurt and it was hard, that's what labor is supposed to do, it is pain with a purpose. I am very empowered by it and very proud of it. I want the healthiest and most natural way for my baby to come into the world and me to bring them here.
If myself going through pain (although there is so much you can do to avoid it without using drugs, I haven't even tried the water or hypno yet!) means I am not going to be exposed to things that are dangerous for my baby, and that I won't put myself at risk for complications including a Csection which is such a big deal as it forever changes the way you can give birth, I'm all for it. I support VBAC's all the way, it is just hard to find a provider willing to do it, that and there ARE more risks to labor after a Ceserean.
I don't mean to preach (although I totally mean to educate) or make you uncomfortable, I have just done so much research and educated myself in a well rounded way, not just hippy stuff, but stuff with medical journals backing it too. Labor is such a special thing and I wish more women looked at it that way; that they didn't see it as **go to the hospital, get my drugs, have the "doctor deliver my baby" (what about all the work mom does?).** In my opinion it shouldn't just be the means to get a baby here, it is an amazing bonding and growing experience for everyone involved.
:-)
). Pit, Epi x 3, Water broken, 3 hours of pushing, forcepts. Did get a healthy baby though! My second, Talmage, was a natural labor in the hospital with a midwife. Wonderful! Painful, but it was labor, and was a great experience. Anyway, we are very close, but on pretty different plains as far as the whole childbirth thing goes. Here's an email conversation we just had that left me very empowered and proud after I read though it. Anyway, enjoy! Oh and please don't bash her. She means well, she doesn't insult me or anything, just doesn't get it yet and thinks I'm crazy! So my son's 1st birthday is tomorrow, so that's where this first comment from her comes from:
Can you believe its been a year since you spent 4 hours in misery and had the sweet little guy?
My response:
Oh don't make it sound so bad! I was actually thinking about that today though. Really only the last hour at most was truly really bad. The couple hours before that was difficult and painful, but managable. I didn't flip out till the very end ;-) I'd totally do it again
Her response:
I know you'll do it again but are you sure you don't want to be a little more comfortable the next time? Your still gonna push them out just the same, just not so painful of a memory. And you can't tell me that it wasn't excrutiating pain that last hour... I think its awesome that you just carry them for 9 months and get them out alive!
My response:
I've been through the epidural route with Mckayla so I've had both experiences. I was pretty miserable with Mckayla the last 3 hours, painfullly aching legs, throwing up, having to be told what my own body was doing, having a catheter and being stuck in bed not being able to move my lower body. Not to mention the drugs that were in my body. I know they'll tell you they are pretty safe but I would rather not take the chance and expose my baby or myself to any dangers from the drug or the procedure. Beyond that, interfering with a normal labor (and labor is a normal event, not an illness or condition) with pit or rupturing membranes or pain meds only multiplies the chances of more interventions happening like heart rate issues for mom and baby which can equal more drugs to regulate, slowed or stalled labor (not every time, I realize this, but a lot), more breathing difficulties and a sleepy baby sometimes for the baby, an IV, continuous EFM meaning you're stuck in bed which is not the best way for the baby to descend.
If the baby doesn't descend well as it would if mom were in an upright or hands and knees postition, basically anything but lying in bed even semireclined, that is what leads to long hard pushing, forcepts or vacuum, and ultimately C-sections.
I do admit that the last hour was excruciating at times, not the whole hour, mostly the 30min or so during transition before pushing.
I do not at all have a painful or bad memory of my labor. I have a better memmory of Talm's than Mckayla's. Talm's labor hurt and it was hard, that's what labor is supposed to do, it is pain with a purpose. I am very empowered by it and very proud of it. I want the healthiest and most natural way for my baby to come into the world and me to bring them here.
If myself going through pain (although there is so much you can do to avoid it without using drugs, I haven't even tried the water or hypno yet!) means I am not going to be exposed to things that are dangerous for my baby, and that I won't put myself at risk for complications including a Csection which is such a big deal as it forever changes the way you can give birth, I'm all for it. I support VBAC's all the way, it is just hard to find a provider willing to do it, that and there ARE more risks to labor after a Ceserean.
I don't mean to preach (although I totally mean to educate) or make you uncomfortable, I have just done so much research and educated myself in a well rounded way, not just hippy stuff, but stuff with medical journals backing it too. Labor is such a special thing and I wish more women looked at it that way; that they didn't see it as **go to the hospital, get my drugs, have the "doctor deliver my baby" (what about all the work mom does?).** In my opinion it shouldn't just be the means to get a baby here, it is an amazing bonding and growing experience for everyone involved.
:-)
