The Benefits of CLW - Page 2

[PrennaMama]

Guilty conscience got the best of me

I made a couple of pathetic attempts at sorta nudging Prenna tward weaning; she was ambivalent, miffed here and there, but not TOO stormy. Then it was like this feeling of guilt started settling into my gut. I'd kind of discourage it and say, "Really? Do you need it? Can you wait? Num is for night night." And she would just give this look like, "Are you nuts, Mom?? I wouldn't ask if I didn't need it! Duh!" And then we had a crazy few months (wedding, moving... all in the same week, after months of planning and prepping) and during, she had to have it... all the time. As a matter of fact the day of the wedding, she INSISTED (22 mo) on my disrobing, right before I was to meet my dad for the walk down the aisle, dress half off, etc, and having a 'moment', which the photographer lady caught on film, and tho I was a little weirded out by it she said "Some day u will want to look back on this memory." Already I look at the picture, and it's amazing to me.

I have gone on auto-pilot at night, she cries, I get up in my sleep, and sleep walk to her, take her up, set her in place and she nurses. Sometimes I fall asleep right there in our chair, sometimes it's just for a minute or 2 and then I lay her back down. Every morning, at 7-7:30, dh retrieves her from her bed, where she sits calling "DAD! DAD!" and delivers her to me, she always has like 3 paci's with her, and will hand them to me and ask me to put them on the table, and will "dial in radio-free-Japan" giving me the worst tittie twisters, and pressing her face in 'em and smelling and literally grooming the boobs for 10 minutes or longer before even getting down to nursing (is that normal?)... and we all have a nice long family cuddle and doze off together.

For me, it has been about releasing what I felt obligated to do and allowing that guilty feeling to just fade away. Now I have to work on the social guilt... does that make sense?

[HerbanGirl]

This is such a great thread! I want to CLW when our little one comes, but I've worried about the social pressures. Now at least I have some resources to back up my instinct about this! Thanks y'all!

[rmzbm]

This thread is AWESOME!

[Swallace]

How about helps with tantrums of any kind of any age!!!

Gives busy moms time to relax!!!

Do not have to ever worry about dehydration in a child when he is still nursing.

helps reconnect busy playing children with their momma!!

[lszadk]

Hi all,
I just wanted to post and say how encouraging this thread is... my son has been extremely healthy no ear infections, etc so far, and he just turned one. There have been times (growth spurts anyone?) where I was sure I wasn't going to last this long, but now we're at a year, and I see him stretching his limits and I'm already sad about when he won't be nursing anymore. He doesn't seem interested in stopping now, and he's just getting the hang of solids, but I know he'll stop someday, so all that to say, thanks for the encouragement! Right now I'm just trying to follow his lead, and look for the cues that will let me know when he's ready.

[lszadk]

oh, and I forgot to mention (although I'm sure others already have) The main benefits outside of the irreplaceable intimacy of nursing, are that bf is his first line of medicine and nutrition. I can't see him being nearly as healthy on the limited diet of solids he has now.

[Mammy Julie]

The biggest benefit for us has been on the few occasions when ds has been ill and been off his food he still nurses. Its reassuring to know that whilst he isnt eating food hes still getting something in him.

Ds also has a kean interest in Biology that I think stems from still being nursed. He wants to know which other animals give milk to their babies which leads onto other questions about how they look after them, what they eat etc. He also has a fascination with babies and other children who bf. I'm hoping that nursing him to an age where he has memory of it will enforce it in his mind as the norm so that when he has children he can support his partner to nurse their babies.

[SereneBabe]

I can't know this, but, I think a benefit of this child-led process that tends to lead to "extended" nursing (my daughter is 4.5) is how the nurslings will likely associate the experience with positive feelings. What I mean is that they'll probably nurse their own kids or support partners who do.

--Heather

[mother_sunshine]

[monica3674]

Originally Posted by lszadk

I can't see him being nearly as healthy on the limited diet of solids he has now.

I don't really have to worry about my 27mo DD's nutrition - is she getting enough of such and such? We do feed her healthy things, but sometimes she doesn't eat as much.

As long as she is nursing, any gaps in nutrition are more than made up with my breastmilk.

Monica

[Msrainbow]

My Toddler will hardly eat solid foods! Looking for suggestions...

Hello Everyone!
It is nice to be a part of such like minded moms who all believe in CLW. I have been nursing my daughter of 21 months pretty much on demand -- whenever she wants it, I am there. But now we are facing some problems. She will not eat much solid food or even drink much other than my breast milk. She became extremely constipated which has led to her withholding stools. We were in the emergency room this last weekend and they suggested Miralax which I do not want to give. I would like to nurse her back to health and I know that she really needs a lot of fruit and fluids. Is it possible that I am breast feeding too much and I could be preventing her from getting the nutrition she needs? Do any of you put a limit to the amount you breast feed before a meal? Any suggestions or comments would be greatly appreciated.

[Kira's mom]

Dd self weaned 1 mos shy of her 4th bday. She has never drank reg milk, but since she weaned will drink some chocolate milk. She always nursed on demand and really didn't have much interest in solids until around 13 mos. I always felt that as long as she was gaining and growing she was getting enough. My ped at the time actually suggested that i STOP nursing around 2yrs because she was off the charts for weight! She is now actually very slim. The great thing about children is they eat when they are hungry and not just beacause they are 'supposed' to.I never forced food because i had to espect and admire someone honoring their own body! I am not a doctor however. I never expected her to say she was done at almost 4. She is now 3 mos shy of 5 and I heard her pray the other day"Dear G_d, Please put milk back in my mommy's boobies" Hope this helps a little.

[Enudely]

MsRainbow, you'll get more responses to your question if you start a new thread in the Breastfeeding forum. This one already has a topic.



Oh yeah, and to MDC!!!

[sweetpeppers]

Originally Posted by VaDoula

I agree with "it's just easier this way." I was trying to wean my son when he turned two but he decided for us that weaning just wasn't a good idea. He is so much happier when he gets his booby. Plus, I know he is getting a good snack/meal. We also get more sleep by breastfeeding and co-sleeping.

Isn't it great how kids know better than we do about stuff like that? All we gotta do is listen and pay attention, and nursing really helps with that. You can't just give your toddler a bottle of milk or juice or a cookie when they're upset, because they KNOW what they need. You gotta stop and focus on their need while you're nursing.

"She is now 3 mos shy of 5 and I heard her pray the other day"Dear G_d, Please put milk back in my mommy's boobies" Hope this helps a little."



Awwwwwwwwwwww!

[a(TM)?Star]

This thread is great, thank you Michelle.

[Jade's Mom]

I agree with all of the benefits of breastfeeding...of course. My dd is 2.75 and still nursing...more than she did at 1yr.

However, to me there is a difference between "extended breastfeeding" and CLW. "Extended" really just mean longer than the majority of kids, but does not necessarily mean the mother won't initiate weaning rather than letting the child lead the way.

So, while I agree with all of the pps, I don't think they really answer the question because they speak to "extended" breastfeeding, which can be, but isn't necessarily CLW. And, CLW does not necessarily mean nursing into toddlerhood. I know several mothers who were totally committed to both extended bf & CLW, and their children weaned themselves long before the mother's were ready, and in all cases just past the age of 1 (and no, they weren't nursing strikes).

To me, the benefits of CLW are really psychological. To a young child, nursing "IS" love. To deny it feels like saying "no you can't have my love, support or attention right now." That's not to say I don't tell dd "no." Sometimes it's just not a good time (ie: I'm cooking dinner and there are hot pans on the stove that can't be walked away from, or we are in a store that doesn't have a comfortable or convenient place to sit). I'll also tell her we're not going to nurse for a long time. You can nurse long enough for mommy to sing a song, or until the timer goes off & I need to pull dinner out of the oven. That meets both our needs. She gets the attention/love/support she needs, but I am not tied down for 20 minutes when I need to attend to something else.

Honestly, I haven't decided if I'm going to let her lead the way or if in the future I'll start gently initiating weaning. I just know right now it doesn't feel right to tell her she can't anymore. I take it day-by-day and we'll just see how it plays out.