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pushing questions - Page 3

post #41 of 53
I have pushed out 2 babies and it was pretty much my body doing the pushing and I was along for the ride. Yes, it was very intense, yes, it was hard work, but no, I never actually felt like "I can't do this, give me drugs" -- That thought never crossed my mind. Yes, the way birth is played up in movies and stories makes it sound absolutely terrifying. I was scared to death to birth a baby until I actually got pregnant the first time and started reading all I could about natural childbirth. I would strongly recommend reading the Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (Ina May Gaskin) it's an amazingly positive book about birth and women's bodies and I would call it my main inspiration. After learning all I could, I wasn't scared any more, I was excited about it and wanted to experience it. I actually enjoyed my birth experiences (probably more in retrospect than actually right there, but hey, it's nice to look back and think happily about it all ). Good luck to you. I found it very helpful to really pay attention to what I was feeling, sensations, etc., and really trying to let my body guide me to do what felt right for me.
post #42 of 53
the first birth, for me, was after many agonizing hours of not progressing (or something). I *think* I may have had a cervical lip but nobody told me nothin' so I don't know why it was so awfully painful.

so, #1, with light epidural and pit, was VERY hard work, and 2.5 hours of HARD pushing, with episiotomy and attempts at vacuum extraction to boot (I say attempts 'cos baby had too much hair and the thing kept slipping off heehee).

#2 was an easygoing water birth. Well, not exactly water birth as I flipped up on my knees at the last minute (my mom had sudden doubts as to the safety of WB... oh well.) But pushing was very light, very slow and easy. I don't even know how long I "pushed" for...it did not feel like work. Just consciously relaxing everything and pressing oh so slightly so baby could emerge. After his head was out, he rotated and stretched out his legs, and birthed himself the rest of the way!
post #43 of 53
I'm not a good pusher My first child was posterior, born sunny side up, left me with a 2.5cm seperation of the pubic bone. OUCH! But I was in a hospital with forced purple pushing. Second birth was much easier, I pushed and gave birth while squatting, but it still took an hour to get my 6lb 10oz baby out. I had a cervical lip which held things up. I just let my body find its own rhythm to push. A ctx would come and I would begin standing at the end of the bed, as it intensified I squatted down, working with the gravity of the earth. I wish I was one of these women who pops the kid out in two pushes, but I dont think it will happen Don't worry. Your body will know what to do. I scream bloody murder like I'm being killed when I push. I waste a lot of energy doing that, and I had worn out my chest muscles so badly after ds2's birth that I couldn't stand up straight for a day!
post #44 of 53
It totally depends. With my first baby it was a huge effort, but she wasn't optimally positioned - this makes a huge difference. With my next 3 babies, I didn't even have to try to push. My body did the work and they were all pushed out w/o effort on my part (conscious effort anyway) in minutes, if that. They basically barreled out of me. Do what you can to make sure the baby is positioned well, and listen to your body's cues as to what position to take. Don't purple push it unless there's some sort of emergency, and be sure to stay well hydrated & fed so you'll have the energy for the work ahead.
post #45 of 53
Thread Starter 
OK well I think I have figured out my issue. I have this horrible fear of dying while pushing (presumably a heart attack or something like that). I think its because I watched a movie called "Midwife" many years ago with Sissy Spacek. She played a hb mw. The mom was in labor and there was a big ice storm and they needed to transfer because the baby wasnt coming out but because of the storm they couldnt leave. So mom kept pushing and pushing and pushing for hours and hours and finally just fell over dead. Apparently it has really affected me because I remember even when I was pg with #1 (5 years ago) asking people about pushing etc. I am not afraid of the pain of labor, or the pain of pushing, just dying. Funny the things that make an impression.
post #46 of 53
Wow!...I remember that movie. Well I think you should totaly drown that image with loads of positive birth stories.
Baby Catcher By Peggy Vincent
Spiritual Midwifery or Ina May's Guide to Childbirth By Ina May Gaskin.
Re-train your brain to view birth as normal and safe.
post #47 of 53
Pushing was terrifying for my husband to watch. He said he swore my lips would rip in two, my face turned purple and blue. The expression inhuman. It was nothing he could have hoped to prepare for. Not to mention the hellish screams I let out between pushes because I was more pissed off than anything. After the birth, I took a shower. I was shocked to see myself just covered in red freckles and spots, particularly in my face and chest. All broken capillaries. My eyes looked horrible. I knew it was work, but I had no freaking clue that it my blood pressure would be so high to allow something like that to happen and I wouldn't have a heart attack or brain aneurysm.

To note, her head was stuck had had to be mostly manually delivered since my body refused to obey instructions to avoid that. Most of heaviest pushing occured when I was trying to get her unstuck on my own unsuccessfully. I had no drugs beyond oxytocin in the last few minutes (uterus decided to go on vacation all the sudden when the moment of truth came).
post #48 of 53
Originally Posted by savithny View Post
Well, for my first I did have to push - no one coached me, I *had* to push, like waves of this urge to throw up, only downwards. I remember wondering how people in the birthstories who report "Oh, then they made me wait to push because the OB wasn't there" could DO it - but they're all epiduraled up, I guess...

But just because it was completely involuntary and irresistible didn't mean it wasn't work... it was this giant wave of "heave ho" sensation that I just had to go along with and use my effort along with, somehow, and I *was* noisy - DH assumed that it must have hurt from the sounds I made, but they were *work* noises. Picture a Bulgarian weightlifter doing 300-pound clean-and-jerk lifts, and that was what it was like - grunting with effort. The next day my abs felt like I'd been doing situps. But man, was it a huge rush, too, and *for me* the pushing didn't hurt. I was also a bit of a marshmallow - it wasn't anything that required Jane Fonda Abs or anything like that.

That's *just* my experience, and its different for everyone....

I have to say after giving birth i really wondered how women could wait to push!! your body does all the work, i think you're only there to help out :
post #49 of 53
Originally Posted by germanshepherdess View Post

I have to say after giving birth i really wondered how women could wait to push!! your body does all the work, i think you're only there to help out :

I was in my MWs office Tuesday and asked her about pushing. I asked her what makes a good pusher? I have 4 babies and pushed each of them out in less than 15 minutes, 3 of them in less than 10. I have a very good friend that pushed for 4 hours with #1 and 2 hours with #2. My babies were considerably larger than hers and we both birth at home (my last 2 at home).

My MW believes that most of it is psychological. She finds that women that have unresolved issues and or fear have longer pushing stages. She feels that I push my babies out so quickly because I believe in the process, know my body well and listen to it and don't have any fear of labor or pushing. Even with my last two when it was painful to push I wasn't really fearful it was just something I knew I had to get through.
My MW is also a strong believer in a woman pushing when she feels the urge and has no issue with a woman being 10cm for hours without pushing as long as the baby is doing just fine. She never checked me in my labors so I don't know if I was 8 or 10 when I first started pushing. I have to tell you knowing that she trusted me so much and trusted the process made me feel even more powerful and uninhibited.

She told me that a lot of women over think pushing - the ones that ask her a lot about pushing and how and where and what position are the ones that push the longest. I remember being surprised in birth class when a woman brought up the fact that we hadn't really discussed pushing and she wanted someone to tell her how to do it. I told my MW that I just figured it was like pooping and she agreed. It is an impulse and when a woman is able to be connected and listen to her body she waits for the impulse and goes with it.

post #50 of 53
Baby #1 -- hospital birth, I showed up in transition but didn't know it. They were monitoring me for a while before they realized I was ready to push, so they wheeled me in a rush to the delivery room. As soon as I got on the delivery bed and pushed once, it felt like such a relief. I hadn't realized it but while I was being monitored, my body was starting to push on its own. Anyway, the pushing felt so good that I put everything into it and burst capillaries on my face and in my eyes. The nurses told me to back off. But it still felt good to push -- the only pain was the ring of fire with the head birthing. I birthed semi-upright, with a nurse and dh helping me hold up/back my legs.

Baby #2 -- homebirth. I remembered how great pushing felt and probably started in on it earlier than necessary. I did a lot of grunting and moaning with the pushes, which surprised me because I was quite quiet in the hospital. Again, it was the ring of fire that was painful, not the pushing.

Baby #3 -- homebirth. I was in the bathroom, trying to walk and rock through the contractions for as long as possible this time, so I didn't start pushing too early. My mw called through the door that I sounded pushy, did I want to come into the bedroom and try some pushing? I made a beeline for the bed, got on my hands and knees, and started pushing. Again, it felt good to push, and there wasn't even much of the ring of fire thing that time. And lots of moaning and vocalizing again (dh shut the window so we wouldn't alarm any neighbours at 2 am ) and pushing was pretty short, she was out in about 3 pushes I think.

None of my pushing phases have gone longer than 30 mins, I think. Waiting until your body tells you to push is a huge help, in my experience.
post #51 of 53
No blue in the face pushing for me.

I waited until my body just couldn't not push. Then the baby came in 3 pushes and I remember feeling no pain at all in between pushes. I could feel the baby between my legs. I remember that part very clearly.

Yes, I firmly believe that waiting until you can't hold it in anymore is key.
post #52 of 53
Thread Starter 
In my mw's book that she gives out ( a binder w/ info printed out) there is an article about a mw (or maybe it was even an ob I dont recall) who went to Jamaica to a hosp there to work/volunteer. All the moms labored in one room and went across the hall to deliver. The mw's were so busy with deliveries that they really werent with the laboring moms and they never checked them. The moms simply walked across the hall when they felt the urge to push. The writer says that despite the fact that all the women were flat on their backs, they ALL pushed out their babies in 30 min or less because they came across the hall when their bodies told them to go.

The writer also says she applies the same thing in her practice and has the same results. 30 min or less - first time moms, vbacs, everybody goes quick.
post #53 of 53
I read that book Midwives, too. It's scary, isn't it, that that pretend mama died from pushing so much. Don't forget though, that it's pretend. Hard to let go of, I know. I read The Red Tent in the last couple of days of my last pregnancy.

You can do it. Your body is made to get this baby out, and then have more babies.
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