the no-spanking law in CA? - Page 2

[peacelovingmama]

Originally Posted by heartmama

This is a matter of safety. Many injuries happen without a parent ever intending to "beat" a child. The fact is that most spanking happens with reactive anger, and in those moments parents misjudge their strength. Suddenly a smack in the face is a ruptured eardrum, a blow with a belt becomes a split lip when the child turns to run away. Kids are bruised all the time from physical punishment.

If it's okay to pass a law saying parents must put our kids in carseats, then we can handle this law. It is no different to me. Parents are not lined up behind bars for car seat infractions. People understand that a child might unbuckle themselves, or that a parent might rush a child to the ER without remembering to buckle them in to a seat. We see parents driving around without carseats ALL the time. But the expectation is that they use them...and so most of the time, most parents obey the law.

I agree. I am a prosecutor and I have seen countless cases of spankings escalating and resulting in serious injuries and/or death. Often, the spanking is inflicted on a very young child (under age 2) and I frequently see fatalities around potty-learning and sleeping issues. Granted, one core issue is education/ignorance of child development but a law would certainly send a strong message to millions of parents. Plus, I'd love to see a law like this generate some real diaglogue around violence and why we still condone it when it comes to little ones. I don't see why people are so protective of the "right" to inflict pain on small children.

[WuWei]

I certainly understand that physical (and emotional and sexual) abuse of children happens. And there are already laws which don't stop it. And there are consequences, punishments and interventions. Self-control in the heat of anger, can not be effectively legislated, imo. The "support and services" of CPS already has an adversarial reputation. I agree that non-punitive resources, education regarding developmental phases, and most importantly respite childcare are needed for struggling parents. I believe that proactive resources for supporting our most vulnerable citizens nurture safety.

Pat

[irinam]

Somewhat OT, but DH and DS (19yo) were horsing around today and DH jokingly said "I'll smack you upside the head!" or something along those lines

I chimed in: "But that's illegal honey! He is an adult already"

And then I thought to myself "But it would be perfectly legal to smack my 6yo
"
Not that I would ever...

Isn't it ironic? (As in sad "ironic")

[DevaMajka]

Originally Posted by *mama moose*

DH thinks its "crossing the line" into being too invasive and gives government an excuse to butt into peoples personal lives (though he is anti-spanking as well),

Does he think that the laws that prevent adults from hitting other adults are too invasive? How are laws against children from being hit any more invasive than laws against spousal abuse? (not picking on your dh- my dp's immediate response would probably be the same as your dh's, and he's the most anti-spanking person I know!)

Originally Posted by peacelovingmama

I favor a law banning domestic violence against children of ALL ages. But I don't favor penal consequences at this point in time. Hitting children is simply too engrained in our culture not to put some serious education and outreach out there in combination with an advisory law (or one with mandatory parenting classes, counseling or support as a consequence).

Ita. It's just one step, to get awareness out. Education needs to happen, and imo, punishment doesn't teach

[phathui5]

I'm all for it. And I'm a Libertarian. I would like the government to stay far, far away from me. But I see Canada's law with no hitting of children under two as more than reasonable. I'd call it a good start. The CA law isn't banning hitting; it's banning hitting of children under three (who probably end up with the most injuries from physical punishment).

[LoveBeads]

I think it's wonderful. And I'm not even convinced that many people will be shelling out fines and doing jail time - I just think that it might make future parents think carefully about how they want to discipline their kids and perhaps they will research alternatives. If something is declared "illegal" it becomes very powerful. And maybe it will make the "I turned out fine" crowd think twice.

[mama2mygirl]

I read the proposal last night and I think it's actually for kids three and under. I think it's a great start.
I think without a law to change things, people are going to just continue to think of spanking as normal. I mean, it was legal to hit a grown woman with a stick no bigger than your thumb not that long ago. I think the change in the law came before the change in attitude. It was illegal to beat an ANIMAL in this country before it was illegal to beat a child. I think sometimes change has to be forced.
I don't think the law will be passed. San Jose is about an hour away from where I am and boy is everyone in an uproar about it. But I think it would be great if it was. There are actually free parenting classes available here. More would be better because I agree that you can't just leave a parent with no ideas on how to parent. (Where my mom lives in CA there are actually free what I'd consider GD classes! Okay, they're five bucks, but still, for a nonviolent communication class that's amazingly inexpensive.)Spanking is ingrained in the communties here and that will be hard to change. But if the change is forced then alternative forms of discipline with have to be used.
Oh, and the violent crimes in Sweden went way DOWN after they passed the no-spanking laws.

[mcs]

i would say that we can only WISH for something so wonderful to happen. i mean, i has to start somewhere.
it seems so obvious. sooo obvoious. hitting is wrong.
mcs

[Mamma Mia]

I would have no problem with this law if it wasn't punitive. I would like to see CA ban all spanking, but being punitive isn't the answer.

[WuWei]

Bumping so I don't have to retype my opinion in the other thread.


Pat

[Breeder]

Hitting is not a moral issue. If you can't legally smack your co-worker in the mouth for whining why on earth should you be able to do so to a child?

This is about health and saftey, it isn't a personal freedom to be able to do physical harm to your children. It's an oversight that I can watch a parent smacking their kid repeatedly in the grocery store and no one does a thing (not even the uniformed policemen present) if that person had been smacking another adult, the parent would have been arrested. It seems awfully unbalanced.

I don't like the thought of the government telling people how to parent but I don't feel like striking a child is a parenting "choice", it's harmful.