Thank you for all of your insightful words. Let me address a few things:
-This started because she just visited a friend of hers and told me they suggested a fabulous sleep book that she HAD to get. I started in on how horrible it was, thinking she didn't know it was pro-CIO. She knew and approved.
-Knowing alternatives: she knows alternatives and says that "if a baby is fed and dry there's no reason they shouldn't lay down and go to sleep. A couple of pats on his back and that's it. It worked when I was babysitting and they were fine."
: And while she's gung-ho to read the pro-CIO book she refuses to read any alternative books - I'm simply HOPING that she'll read the links I sent her.
-Respecting choices: she doesn't really respect mine lately. At first she was all good but now I'm getting the comments like:
---do you EVER put him down?
---he'll still be sleeping in your bed forever (I asked her how many 18 yr olds she knew who still slept with their parents - she said she didn't know any 18 yr olds who had co-slept. *sigH*)
---I was complaining that my legs hurt from bouncing DS to sleep (then during a nap he needs to keep bouncing ....) for like an hour after doing a tough lower body weight workout. She couldn't understand why I would bounce him like that. Just.Couldn't.Get.It.
---during the same conversation she mentioned how "disgusting" it was that some people are still breastfeeding at 5 yrs old.
So while the CIO is only one issue - I'm afraid it is going to open a door to a ton of larger issues/beliefs. I KNOW I can never be around her if she lets her baby cry. I will need to leave. I also told her she doesn't ever get to babysit. That didn't go over well either. Why would I leave my child with someone who has stated they will put him down and let him cry alone?
I'm really hoping she changes after she has the baby. I know I was NEVER going to co-sleep. Yeah, well the crib makes a fantastic laundry holder.