Please help - my son is pushing off my breast and crying... and losing weight.

[ashley1972]

My son is 3.5 months old and lately (off and on - not every time I BF) he pulls off breast or doesn't even want to latch on at all. He starts to cry and gets a little hysterical. he is exclusively breastfed and I know that he is hungry...

I don't think that it is something I ate because my husband can give him a bottle of pumped milk and he takes that with no problem...

What could this be?

This behavior has only been going on for the last few days but the really upsetting thing is that he has LOST 6 oz in the last two weeks. I believe that this is because he is now sleeping 9-12 hours straight through at night w/o waking up. I'm working on increasing my supply. Any ideas would be appreciated.

Thank you.


UPDATE: Thank you all for your responses, I really appreciate it. Just wanted to let everyone know that he is back on the breast! There were really two seperate issues - 1 - that my supply was low because he started sleeping really long stretches at night and 2 - that he began to pull away and reject the breast. Well I figured out that the herbs that I was taking to increase my supply - Blessed Thistle and Fenugreek - were affecting the taste of my milk and making him not want it! I realized that my urine had a VERY strong odor to it after one day on the herbs and decided to stop them. About 10 hours later he was back to the breast happily nursing. There were no other changes so I am totally convinced it was the herbs!

So now that I am aware of the problem with my supply when we go all night w/o nursing I'm working to remedy that.

Anyway I feel so relieved, it is obviously devestating when your child rejects nursing.

Thank you all for your help with this. And please keep in mind that those herbs can have an affect on the taste of the milk, they certainly did for me.

[momuveight2B]

Bumping you up and sending you hugs. Sounds like everything has been wonderful until now and that you have been doing a terrific job.

Do you have a lll leader you can call nearby? There could be a lot going on here and you will need someone nearby to help you problem solve.

For now feed the baby and let dh give him expressed breast milk in the bottle so that he gets enough calories and gains weight. Continue to offer the breast first and frequently, try him in a sling with you topless or with a top unbuttoned around the house. Wear him as much as you can and don't push the issue if you are both feeling upset. He is a smart baby and will go back to the breast once you have figured out what is upsetting him now.

I strongly recommend co-sleeping topless so that he always has access to the breast. Some babies who resist the breast in the day time can be guided onto the breast in their sleep.

Now some of the common causes that you might look at are the use of body scents, noise and lighting in the room you use, teething, ear infections (has he had a cold?), has anything frightened him while nursing, some babies are more sensitive than others, is he cold or hot, over active let down and I am sure other people have other ideas. If they have an ear infection they often won't latch while laying on that side but you can adjust your position so that they can nurse from both breasts without laying on that ear. But both ears can be infected and then they will resist both or will only nurse sitting up. He may just have a lot of fluid in his ears and no tempature or anything yet if he has recently had a cold.

Hang in there because there is a solution, he just can't tell you yet and he really wants you to help him figure it out.

Hugs

[alegna]

How often is he having bottles? That would be my first guess, that he wants the fast flow. I would totally take bottles out of the equation for now. If he won't nurse at all look at www.kellymom.com for other feeding methods (finger feeding, cup feeding, syringe feeding etc)

try different positions. Co-sleep. Try to nurse in the bathtub together.

good luck!

-Angela

[Attached Mama]

Originally Posted by alegna

How often is he having bottles? That would be my first guess, that he wants the fast flow. I would totally take bottles out of the equation for now. If he won't nurse at all look at www.kellymom.com for other feeding methods (finger feeding, cup feeding, syringe feeding etc)

try different positions. Co-sleep. Try to nurse in the bathtub together.

good luck!

-Angela

I was going to also suggest you try ditching the bottles in favor of a finger feeder/cup etc. Hang in there and good luck![/I]

[daniedb]

Great suggestions. In addition to those ideas, I can also offer this - my almost-12 weeker has been recently getting very distracted and involved in what's going on around him, and every time he nurses when there's the *least* distraction, he takes a suck, pops off and checks out the scene. He also starts to cry, because he's hungry, but he won't get back on the breast himself. I've found that reducing or eliminating distractions, even ambient noises, and putting very gentle pressure on the back of his head with my opposite hand has helped a lot.

Also, remember that 3 months is a huge change time for them, they are usually growth-spurting, learning new things, and some babies are even teething, so I know it's frustrating to hear, but ... yep, here it comes ... this too shall pass! Hang in there mama!

[momuveight2B]

I am usually totally against bottles; my only concern is baby is losing weight. Pump to keep up your supply and you can certainly have dh try other feeding methods. If you do bottle make sure it is really hard work to get the milk out. When did you start offering the bottles? Did the problem start with the intro of bottles? If he has a pacifier best to throw those out too.

[CathMac]

Could you have oversupply / overactive letdown, where the flow is too forceful for DS to handle. If so, try reclining and putting DS "on top" of the breast, so to speak so gravity will be working in his favor. Or you could pump a little of to reduce the forcefulness. See the last link I have included below for more suggestions on this.

Otherwise, from everything I've read on wooing baby back, a relaxed atmosphere is critical. Catching them when they aren't too hungry is important which is why I think co-sleeping is a great idea.

I thought the "Re-birthing" technique (described in one of the links below) sounded a little wacky until I read a story about a woman who seemed to discover this technique by accident. Her husband coerced her into weaning her DD at 3 months and she really regretted it. Months later she was taking a bath with her DD when she reached up and playfully latched on. I vaguely remember a followup post saying that she went on to nurse her again. I have no idea for how long. As one or more of the article on this technique emphasize, safety is really important so you would probably want a "spotter" on hand just in case, but they would probably need to be unobtrusive.

Also, I did come across a recent thread on nursing in the bathtub. It alludes to some of the elements that might be conducive to wooing baby back: warmth, relaxation, comfort, skin to skin contact, etc. I have included a link to this thread beneath the article on Re-Birthing.

HTH, ~Cath

LINKS
Relactation and Induced Lactation Resources
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/adopt/rel...resources.html

Adoptive Breastfeeding & Relactation
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/adopt/index.html

Relactation and Adoptive Breastfeeding: The Basics
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/supply/relactation.html

Help -- My Baby Won't Nurse!
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/...to-breast.html

Re-Birthing: Help For Latch On Problems
http://www.lactationconsultant.info/rebirth.html

MDC link to thread on Nursing In The Bathtub
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...ighlight=water

When a Baby Refuses to Nurse
http://www.mobimotherhood.org/MM/article-refusal.aspx

Helping a Mother with a Baby Who Is Reluctant to Nurse
http://www.lalecheleague.org/llleade...tNov99p99.html

My Baby Just Doesn't Get It
http://www.wiessinger.baka.com/bfing...e/babyget.html

Forceful Let-down (Milk Ejection Reflex) & Oversupply
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/supply/fast-letdown.html

~Cath

[CarolynnMarilynn]

I would also look into reflux. Sometimes they want to nurse for comfort, but their little tummies are hurting. Crying during feeding can be a sign of reflux.

[_betsy_]

My babe did this for a while, too, right around 3 months and is now (at 4 months old) back to nursing no problem. I think it's just a stage?

If he's sleeping so long, are you pumping 2-3 times a night? That will help your supply, an prevent you from being too overly full when he nexttries to latch on.

If you're working, you don't have much choice but to have someone else feed him. But everytime you're with him, offer the breast first, and pump if he will only take a bottle.

I'm thinking lots of skin to skin contact, and maybe even getting him up at night to nurse him, if he's loosing weight. You don't have to fully wake him, just enough to get him to latch on.

I find that my DD latches on much easier at night, so maybe rousing your little one just enough to get him on will help him forget about bottles when you're with him.