at what age would you leave your child home alone overnight

[mandib50]

just wondering and trying to get a feel for it.
i haven't done it personally (my oldest is 13), but know of teens as young as 14 or 15 that stay home alone over nite or for a week-end which kinda gives me a heartattack at the thought of doing it myself (yeah, i'm sort of overprotective).
also, i wonder how your perspective might change on your kids staying home alone overnite if they have a boyfriend or girlfriend, and also if they are caring for younger siblings.

[2tadpoles]

I would leave my 15yo home alone overnight with his 11yo brother. I think they'd be fine.

In three years he's free to pick up and move out if he wants. I think an overnight is within his capabilities.

I really wouldn't care much about the girlfriend thing. I doubt anything significant would happen with a brother nearby. My boys don't leave each other alone for very long.

I probably would want no visitors in the house while I was away, no matter what gender, just for safety's sake.

[aniT]

I think it would depend on the child. My mom didn't leave my alone over night until I was 18. She did have my cousin stay with us. My cousin is 7 years older than me but we are close. I would have my BF and other friends over and she never said a word to my mom. If my child was like me, I would not leave her alone either.

My mom only lives a mile away so I think I would always just take my kids to my moms. I don't think I would leave her/them alone at all.

[gurumama]

16 or so, depending on the child's maturity. But I live in a duple and a cohousing community where all the kids have 10 sets of adult eyes watching them. No big teen parties here!

[Flor]

Well, at 17 I was working and had my own apartment, was finishing Hs and applying to colleges. .. but I think it depends on the child, if they are with siblings/trusted friends, if they have an available adult nearby.

[ashleyhaugh]

i was left alone overnight at 13-14ish i think, with my little sis who is 2 years younger. i know for sure by 16, i was left at home for the weekend while my mom and sis went out of town because i didnt want to go.

i think it depends on the kid and the siblings though. i was always a pretty mature kid

[mmace]

My oldest is thirteen, and I wouldn't consider it yet, not alone and definitely not with her siblings. In fact, I'm very sure that it will be a looonggggg time before I would leave her with siblings overnight - a couple of hours of them by themselves is more than enough.

[SandraS]

I'd try it probably next year, when my oldest is 14. He's taken first aid courses and is very responsible. I don't think I'd leave him with the youngest, but with the middle child, I'd feel alright.

[ani'smama]

I was 15 when my parents started leaving me overnight. In hindsight, I don't think it was a great idea. Some thing went on in my parents house that I wouldn't want going on in my house, and I was a good kid.

That being said, I still think teenagers need to left alone overnight prior to moving out on their own/going away to college. It will probably be 16 or 17 at our house.

[momto l&a]

My parents considered my very responsible at the age of 12-13. Staying alone over night for me was a lot of work on my shoulders.

We live out in the country, had evening and morning chores to do.

I never failed my parents.

[hottmama]

I had my own apartment at 16, I can't imagine not trusting a 16 yr. old for one night! I was left home alone with my younger sister starting around 10 or 11 and would feel safe doing the same with my kids when my oldest is 10-12.

[ASusan]

I can't remember the first time I was left alone overnight - with or without my sister, who was 9 years younger.

However, I do know that I was doing overnight babysitting - for up to 5 kids - when I was 16 or so. Usually if it was all the children, the parents hired 2 babysitters - myself and another teen (we were friends, too).

My parents NEVER let me have a boy over if they weren't home - regardless of whether I had a boyfriend or not. The rule was non-negotiable. So was the no-boys-on-the-second-floor (where the bedrooms were), even if parents were home. (A male didn't go onto the second floor until I got married - at 35!)

[Mama Poot]

The first time I stayed home alone overnight was when I was about 15-16. My mom had to work a few night shifts at the hospital. I'm an only child, so I was a little nervous being by myself, and unfortunately I had someone I know prank call me with threats one night while she was gone. I called the police and my mom and some friends- it was a mess. Not trying to scare ya, just telling what happened to me. I think if they have siblings its better, or at least a neighbor who can drop in and check on them.

[enkmom]

We just left ours this fall for one night, and they are 16 and 17. It was such a non-event that I am sure I could have done it sooner.

[Starr]

I think I was 14. We lived out in the boonies but my aunt and uncle lived a mile away. I was pretty mature and had been babysitting for a couple of years late at night. I think I slept with all the lights on though . It really depends on the child and how they have handled responsibility in the past.

[panamama]

it wouldn't be my first choice w/ mine (14yo), but i think i'd be o-k with it if i had to leave him overnight. right now though, i make plans for someone to stay in our home with him or him to to to their home if i have to be away.

[dctexan]

I was left overnight once I was 16 (my sister was 13). Maturation-wise, I was probably ready by around the age of 14 (9th grade), but I think mom and I both felt more comfortable leaving me "in charge" once I could drive.

[jane197]

I think it depends a lot on the maturity level of the child. Most kids when they are around 14 actually WANT to please their parents and will pretty much follow the rules set out for them when you are not there. Between the ages of 15-17 the quality of wanting to please you is a little less apparent :>) as they struggle with their own independence. That's when things like them telling their friend, who then tells another friend and then the whole east side, that their parents have gone for the weekend. Although it may not necessarily be their fault things can get beyond their control. I guess the moral to the story is......get out while you still can :>) and maybe have a trusted friend neighbor nearby that they can call if they need anything. Good luck!

[mandib50]

interesting. clearly there must be something wrong with ME because at 36 i'm STILL scared sleeping alone in the house when my dh is gone i've always been that way.

however ... i think i could see myself leaving my 16 year old dd, possibly even at 15 yrs old with her siblings over nite if there is another responsible teen with her or a close neighbour she can turn too. (if she feels ready anyway). then again, maybe not

i found this for guidelines which you may find interesting - or not
http://www.nccic.org/poptopics/homealone.html

[jane197]

I hate it when my husband is gone overnight as well - I just don't sleep well. Guess what we don't know when we are young and naive can be a good thing in some ways :>))