|The mom-to-be has requested that two girls be invited. That excludes a LOT of children.
The other hosts do not, so far, seem to want to come out and say "no children"
I've replied that it is simply my comfort level with hosting an event in my home and that if they think it will be a problem I'm open to other venue ideas. I've said that twice now and no one is offering to host or pay for renting a place yet insisting that children shouldn't be outright excluded
I don't see what the problem is. Word the invitations like this:Due to space limitations, this is an adults-only gathering. Please RSVP by XXX date to only ONE PHONE NUMBER
Multiple phone numbers for acceptance means more people will show up because the different gals accepting the RSVPs will always figure, "Oh, it's just one or two extras...nobody will mind..." Multiply that by several people you'll have, perhaps, 10+ extra guests! One phone number, one gal handling the RSVPs!!!
When they call to accept, tell them
you've got them marked down as "1" or "2" guests (whatever the number that was on the invite list for their name) and thank them for calling
. If they ask about bringing the children, "Oh, sorry, it was on the invites. There just isn't room for 45 adults AND children at the shower. We're making this a fun and fancy grown-up party. Can you still make it without the children?"
Either they'll make other arrangements or they'll refuse.
Expect to have a few upset responses. That's life, get over it. Sometimes, children just aren't part of EVERY gathering!
By the way, you can't very well invite two girls and no others. It's an all or neither type of situation! You can't pick and choose which children can come without offending people. Ask the mom-to-be why those two girls and explain the problem with inviting just those two. She should understand and accept the fact that they simply can't be invited without offending those that are told they
can't bring their
Now, know that, no doubt, someone will show-up with their children in tow. It is inevitable. When they do, be polite, remind them about the wording on the invite and explain that there really isn't any room for children. Be firm about this!
If you allow them to stay, I promise you'll have a bunch of angry (quietly, but still) guests that will wonder why it's okay for THOSE children but not mine?
: Expect tension in the house immediately.
I completely understand having a no-children party. Children SHOULDN'T be expected at every gathering, imo.
I do not
understand having a shower at a person's home for 45 people! It sounds awful. No time for sharing nice stories and having small talk with the mom-to-be, which, I believe, is what a shower is supposed to be.
But, then, I hate showers of any kind, bridal OR baby! I always RSVP "regrets" and send or deliver a gift before the date.