whew!We had a talk, and he has agreed to let me take her to counseling. WOOOOOOT!!
He also pointed out that while she mirrors my worst habits it is proof of her admiration. He also gently reminded me that I swear waaaaaaay too much, which is true. I worked in warehouses and bars for about 20 years, so you can take the girl out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the girl. So, I may institute the swearing jar at our house and see how many quarters it costs me.
WE also both agreed that since the move we have had very little outside interferance and the wacko aunts will probably never be a problem again, so now we can just work on getting rid of the negative effects from the past couple of years.
I believe with the 2 of us having chronic illnesses and her childish version of 'the ambulance took mommy to the hospital and she never came home,' she just might have fears about us abandoning her. For the first year after 'Mommy's' death, she and my husband both woke up every single night at 4 AM, the time that it happened. I shudder to think how much damage she inflicted with the 'attention getting suicide attempts' from several years. None of us believe she meant to die, it was the guilt trip 'attempt' she was prone to. The end result is the same though. I agree she needs to know Mommy had a hand in her own death, because I think every time one of us goes to the doctor she worries. On top of all that, I get migraines and so did she, and I think dd thinks there may be more similarities.
So, with any luck our first therapist will be a good one and she and I can work it out. I suspect her continuing sleep problems may be contributing to her problems at school, so hopefully I can get the pediatrician to suggest something to help her stay asleep. I just realized with the time change, she is still waking up at 4:00! So, the sleep thing will be discussed with the therapist also.
I can hardly wait. How much do you wanna bet my son gets jealous of our therapy time?