|Originally Posted by alegna
Okay, all of the below are IMO.....
These are not CLW:
significant limits (ie no nursing away from home)
don't offer/don't refuse
offering significant other milk or sucking
Depending on the age and the individual child, weaning while pregnant may not be CLW.
Originally Posted by CalebsMama05
iagree but i think dodr isnt clw if the mother tries to distract the child and then say "well i didnt refuse him!"
Ok but what age are you talking about? 9 months? 12 months? 24 months? 3 years? 5 years? I think that make a big difference.
If my 3 year old wanted milk (and wasn't allergic to it) I don't think that offering her any ammount of milk in any form would have any impact on her nursing. She hasn't ever thought that nursing was equal to any sort of food source (even though even now at 3 year old I still make plenty of milk to feel a let down when she nurses and for her to tell me when the nursies are empty).
If I didn't distract her at times I wouldn't get anything else done. It is the interaction that she reaches for first between us, but it doesn't mean that every time she is asking to nurse that it is what she really wants. Sometimes she just can't think of what else to do. Like an adult that eats because they are bored. A gentle suggestion from me often helps her see that there is other entertainment and ways to aleviate boredome and she happily pursues them. Sometimes she really does want to nurse and then I nurse her, usually. Sometimes I ask her to wait. Sometimes she asks me to wait for certain things. But she is 3 and can function like this. She couldn't when she was 12 months old and I didn't expect her to.
I agree with those who say that this list of rules just is to make some of you pat yourselves on your backs and look down at others. What would you call a family that ultimately lets the child decide when they are doing nursing altogether but does put restrictions on it? Does it matter if they continue past a certain age? Does it become legitamate clw if the child ultimately weans at 5 after being night weaned at 2 but not if they weaned at 3?
It is kinda funny that this got me so upset. We haven't night weaned. I rarely tell my dd no. We still nip although I do draw the line at walking arround nursing her. My back just can't take that anymore (she is as big as most 4 year olds). I have a couple of other specific nursing rules, like I don't nurse her durring dinner anymore. And at church I just nurse durring the prayers (I can't sing very well while she is latched on, she is so heavy). I also don't stop half way to the park to nurse her sitting on the side walk. I don't pull the car over half way home to nurse her. I don't let dinner burn so that I can nurse her (unless she is injured). These are all times that dd has asked to nurse in the recent past. (some were today). Am I not a clw-er because I put these limits on her? Hard to tell from some of your posts.
I do have a friend who says that her 13 month old self weaned. Well she was mama led weaned down to 1 nursing a day at that point and she finally just quit on her own. I don't personally consider her to have self weaned (not that I talk to my friend about that at all, she knew I didn't agree with her mama led approach but we never discussed it). But there is a huge difference between her and a mama who gently night weans her 2 year old (and otherwise keeps nursing her) or a mama who can't take the criticism so she stops nip-ing her 3 year old or whatever the circumstances are.
I'm just rambling at this point. My point is that if we set the bar too high. If we make it too difficult to acheive we might just convince some mama's that if they need to night wean they might just as well do it all the way since it is pratically the same thing.
Ok I'm done.