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February dating thread - Page 5

post #81 of 152
I've been single for over three years now, and I haven't so much as gone on a date. My life is taken up by church, running kids to voice lessons/youth group/church activities/cub scouts, cleaning our church, and on, and on, and on....Unless a single guy moves into my area and starts coming to church, I don't know how I could possibly meet him! My friend keeps saying that God is just going to send him right to my door - I think He's going to have to!
post #82 of 152
I have dated a little in the 5.5 years I've been single.

I've met men online, set ups by friends & I've met people in my community.
post #83 of 152
I've met decent single men at coffee shops, gaming events, through friends, and online. Not that I'm trying to date any of them, but I've had plenty of offers.
post #84 of 152
I agree that online dating is a legitimate way to meet people.

I also like the fact that I can really screen people before meeting them. I find that there is a lot I am able to find out about a person before meeting them and if there is chemistry or a connection online, there is in person too.

I'm in the midst of a super busy 2 months of courses at school and online. Plus my usual homeschooling, keeping up the house, looking to move, etc. etc., so I'm still online and chat with a few guys every now and then, but I've sort of put dating on hold for a bit.
post #85 of 152
I have never considered online dating but I probably would give it a try in different circumstances.
post #86 of 152
I use it. It works well for screening!
post #87 of 152
Somebody help! I have been separated since April, and just not meeting ANY, not ANY men. I have to start putting that on the top of my list. It is not just happening "by accident" as my mom thinks it well. Perhaps, if I had a day job, it would. I am basically at home with my kids during the day, then work as an SAT tutor in teens' homes evenings and weekends. Not meeting them at Wal-mart or even the roller rink! I really want somebody, right now. It feels as though I am basically wasting away in the middle of nowhere, and if I stay here, am going to die celibate!
post #88 of 152
I've been single for 2 years and have ZERO interest in meeting anyone at this point.
post #89 of 152
I had a guy friend that was online dating. He told me he doesn't give any points to the women online dating. I'm not sure what that means. Does that mean that the men on these sites think we're easy or cheap? We're out there trolling?
post #90 of 152
I don't know. I'm on okcupid, and it's a tad annoying. I keep getting messages from guys who want to sleep with me. You'd think the "I have two kids" statement would weed them out, but apparently they think it makes me easy? : I'm on there just cause I was bored one night and saw that all of you are on there.
post #91 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by rmcarons View Post
Does that mean that the men on these sites think we're easy or cheap? We're out there trolling?
No. That means that is his opinion.
post #92 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by mammakerry View Post
I don't know. I'm on okcupid, and it's a tad annoying. I keep getting messages from guys who want to sleep with me. You'd think the "I have two kids" statement would weed them out, but apparently they think it makes me easy? : I'm on there just cause I was bored one night and saw that all of you are on there.
Try another site. Some sites are a lot more of a "meat market" than others.

I have read that a lot of mamas, from here, are on Match.com.

Take in mind...there a lot more idiots than there are gems on any dating website. Sadly, it is the same irl.

You have to weed through them and approach the ones that ring your "oh, he sounds like a good one" instinct.
post #93 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommyTo3 View Post
I really want somebody, right now. It feels as though I am basically wasting away in the middle of nowhere, and if I stay here, am going to die celibate!
Be VERY careful dating with this frame of mind. That desperation can put you into a relationship that you will eventually come to regret.

I truly believe that as soon as you feel like you don't want or need somebody and are happy, content and at peace with being on your own, the right person will enter your life.
post #94 of 152
I've found that if I post an ad online with my picture, I get a ton of guys interested....but none of them have read anything I've written. So, I find it's better to post without a pic and then I read through the profiles carefully, select the ones I'm interested in (or respond to those who actually read the profiles and are genuinely interested) and then exchange pics.

There is a lot of 'cheapness' that goes along with those sites, but there are also some really great men out there just looking to find a great woman too!
post #95 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by Holland73 View Post
Be VERY careful dating with this frame of mind. That desperation can put you into a relationship that you will eventually come to regret.

I truly believe that as soon as you feel like you don't want or need somebody and are happy, content and at peace with being on your own, the right person will enter your life.
I couldn't agree more.

The relationship disasters I've had in my life have all come when I've been very lonely and eager to meet someone.
post #96 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommyTo3 View Post
Somebody help! I have been separated since April, and just not meeting ANY, not ANY men. I have to start putting that on the top of my list. It is not just happening "by accident" as my mom thinks it well. Perhaps, if I had a day job, it would. I am basically at home with my kids during the day, then work as an SAT tutor in teens' homes evenings and weekends. Not meeting them at Wal-mart or even the roller rink! I really want somebody, right now. It feels as though I am basically wasting away in the middle of nowhere, and if I stay here, am going to die celibate!
i agree what others said to you but aslo, you probably should start trying to meet people and just dont jump into a relatioship with the first guy you meet. i dont know how else you can get started other than to simply try it and really pay attention to your feelings.

as to how, do something new . take a class. vounteer somewhere men might be. what about a book club or if you like to write, a writing workshop? alot of communites have thse sorts of things happening for free all over the place... try ot get a regular sitter so you always have saturday nights off so you are open for a date if it comes up, but use that time to go hear music at a nice place ot something like that and to go out with girlfriends. you really do just have to form a social life and meet lots of differnt people. if you have ever been in terestd in acting, dance, volunteering at an animal shelter, whatever, just try somethig new if you arent meeting people in your normal routine....
post #97 of 152
I met a guy through eHarmony that I've had two dates with and am going to see again tomorrow. He seems really nice and on the same page as me, but I don't feel an overwhelmong amount of chemistry. I'm trying to remain open minded and give it a chance, but this dating thing often feels very tedious and underwhelming. It probably doesn't help that the man I've been in love with for two years who won't commit to me that I recently "ended" it with (ended is in quotes because I haven't cut him out of my life entirely) set the bar pretty high. Yeah, he wouldn't commit and I feel it's right and necessary to move on, but we were uber, uber compatible in every other way and just had such a great time together all of the time. He's highly intelligent, politically and socially conscious, incredibly funny, affectionate, sweet, thoughtful and the best lover I've ever known... soooo, so far anyone I've met since then just seems kinda ho-hum. I want to meet someone with all of his outstanding characteristics who is also on the same page as me. So far, it seems like an unattainably high order. Bah.
post #98 of 152
It sounds to me, not so much that others don't live up to his standard, but that you are hardly over him.
post #99 of 152
i had to erase it again. compulsion took over. its not that it was too personal.. i dont know why but i think i feel like i need to think about it more and not have a statement anywhere about it. : kinda neurotic i guess
post #100 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by rmcarons View Post
It sounds to me, not so much that others don't live up to his standard, but that you are hardly over him.
:

If you are comparing the man you are dating to your X, then you are more than likely not over X.

In all honesty, it also is not fair to the man you are dating.

Take some time for yourself. There is not reason to rush into dating.
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