Help with potty training please

[muttix2]

xposting in toddlers

I have a two year old (turned two in January) and a three year old (will be four in November). Neither are potty trained. I can't even get my oldest to pee in the potty. He'll sit there and cry and hold it. The youngest has started sitting on the potty with his diaper on. We also have a seat for the toilet. Nothing works. Naked, they will just pee and poop on the floor. Diapers on, they would sit in filth for hours before admitting they need a diaper change. They don't want to use the toilet, I don't know why. I let them follow me into the bathroom, I exclaim over dh using the bathroom. I've gotten an Elmo dvd that showcases using the potty. Cloth, sposies. Diapers, pull-ups, underwear. All have been used, all failed. I'm at a loss. Please help.

[lisac77]

My mom (who taught and potty trained 2-year-olds fo 10 years and has 5 kids) says that the best time to train kids is in the summer when it is warm. Strip them naked and take them to the potty every 20-30 minutes. Gloss over accidents, they are no big deal. I did have DS help me clean up his messes. She advocates rewards, but the didn't work for my DS who is resistant to extrinsic motivation. DS pee trained after 2 months of hell last summer, when he had just turned 3. He is still not pooping on the potty.

I am at a loss, and I feel your pain. It if makes you feel any better, you're not alone! Some kids train really easily and other are harder. It's difficult to feel like you've got the only kids in the world who aren't potty trained, though!

[LendaS]

:

Just getting ready to start this process!

Lenda

[katallen]

I found the book Potty Train in Less than a Day to be very helpful. We had several times were she was a little interested then totally uninterested and I had to put the potty chair in the closet but when she was two and a half she got interested and it worked. I had her in underwear that day because I'd run out of diapers at the mall and bought underwear to cover her butt and we kept it on at home.

She didn't know when she was wetting at first and got a little upset about the accidents the first day so we used a lot of encouragement and telling her she could try again. My mom showed her that she wears underwear also when she asked for a diaper and encouraged her to give it another try when she was frustrated from the four accidents. The next day she had only one accident and after that she went all summer without any accident.

I would suggest backing off for a month or so then introducing it in a more positive way next month and encouraging them to get through the accidents and try again. If it is something that has a negative history with you talk to a friend or relative about coming into the home and encouraging them to try again while you take some time for yourself. It is important to keep it a happy and positive thing even when you are feeling like the accidents are to much and they won't get it. They really can learn from accidents even if it takes time.

[clogmama]

I would say just wait until they are ready. The more you want them to use the toilet, the less they will do it. Boys are often ready around 3 or 3 1/2. Summer is also a good idea. You could put a potty in the living room, and see if it sparks interest. They will be more likely to want to use the toilet when they think it is their own idea and are not pressured in any way.

[tarheelbaby]

I have to agree. They'll do it when they are ready. Last summer, I got all gung-ho that I was going to train DS. Didn't happen. He would cry and scream, I would get frustrated. I backed off. Two weeks ago, out of the clear blue sky, DS asks to wear underwear. Was trained in a weekend. He has had a couple of accidents, but that's it. He'll go, wipe himself, wash his hands, pull up his own pants.
I do think spring/summer is a more ideal time to do it, though. The one time DS had a pee accident, we had to change clothes right down to socks and shoes. In warmer weather, this probably would not be an issue.

Good luck!

[lisac77]

Why I didn't wait until he was ready...

I just wanted to say that I was a firm believer in waiting until DS was ready to PT before we did it. Then we started having major battles over diaper changes, especially poop changes. It got to the point where every diaper change was so negative that I decided he had to get out of diapers. That's what prompted me to strip him and PT.

Sometimes kids throw you for a loop, IYKWIM.