As a side note, I had PPD with DS1...which presented itself in severe baby blues, lots of uncontrollable crying, weight loss, feeling hopeless, etc. I'm having some difficulties right now, but I'm not sure if they are PPD related or not...here's the scoop...what do you think?
About all of the time, I feel very anxious - like I have a bad case of the butterflies, almost to the point of being sick/vomiting. My heart feels like it is racing and I'm shakey and jittery. All of this is a lot worse at nighttime as I'm trying to go to bed. All sorts of anxiety inducing thoughts start running through my head and they get all blown out of proportion.
I'm a worrier by nature and also have OCD. But things seemed to have escalated since the birth of DS. Because I had PPD with DS, my mother keeps asking me if I think I am having it now. I do think I may have a touch of the baby blues, but nothing as bad as the first time. I can cry easily, but I think it is brought on moreso from what I wrote that I was feeling above.
I keep thinking about bad things happening - especially in the way of DSs getting very sick. I know it is horrible to even say or think, but we have a strong family history of cancer and I obsess over one of my babies getting it. It's to the point that I think they have it every time they get sick. DS1 had persistent vomiting a bit ago and I just knew that he had something horrible. Turns out, we think it is GERD (reflux), but I still have the thought in the back of my mind that it MIGHT not be that.
DS2 is having a lot of congestion and trouble breathing. We've seen a couple of doctors for it and of course they all think I am overreacting in thinking it's anything BUT simple congestion. But DS gasps and chokes on his breath and so I lay awake all night making sure he hasn't stopped breathing. I keep having thoughts of me falling asleep and him not breathing and I'm not there to help him.
So...lots of "dark" thoughts here. I had been under a lot of stress throughout the pregnancy, which is a really LONG story, but I thought things were getting better. Right after DS2 was born (3 weeks ago) I was on such a euphoric high - so happy and relieved that we'd had a great birth and that the baby was healthy in spite of some things that had happened during the pregnancy. (I was exposed to toxic mold.)
Anyway, is this a form of PPD? What should I do? Meds and counseling are out of the question for us right now as I don't have insurance once my maternity medicaid runs out. We're on such a tight budget that we couldn't even do sliding scale right now.
Is there something else I can do to alleviate some of these problems?
About all of the time, I feel very anxious - like I have a bad case of the butterflies, almost to the point of being sick/vomiting. My heart feels like it is racing and I'm shakey and jittery. All of this is a lot worse at nighttime as I'm trying to go to bed. All sorts of anxiety inducing thoughts start running through my head and they get all blown out of proportion.
I'm a worrier by nature and also have OCD. But things seemed to have escalated since the birth of DS. Because I had PPD with DS, my mother keeps asking me if I think I am having it now. I do think I may have a touch of the baby blues, but nothing as bad as the first time. I can cry easily, but I think it is brought on moreso from what I wrote that I was feeling above.
I keep thinking about bad things happening - especially in the way of DSs getting very sick. I know it is horrible to even say or think, but we have a strong family history of cancer and I obsess over one of my babies getting it. It's to the point that I think they have it every time they get sick. DS1 had persistent vomiting a bit ago and I just knew that he had something horrible. Turns out, we think it is GERD (reflux), but I still have the thought in the back of my mind that it MIGHT not be that.
DS2 is having a lot of congestion and trouble breathing. We've seen a couple of doctors for it and of course they all think I am overreacting in thinking it's anything BUT simple congestion. But DS gasps and chokes on his breath and so I lay awake all night making sure he hasn't stopped breathing. I keep having thoughts of me falling asleep and him not breathing and I'm not there to help him.
So...lots of "dark" thoughts here. I had been under a lot of stress throughout the pregnancy, which is a really LONG story, but I thought things were getting better. Right after DS2 was born (3 weeks ago) I was on such a euphoric high - so happy and relieved that we'd had a great birth and that the baby was healthy in spite of some things that had happened during the pregnancy. (I was exposed to toxic mold.)
Anyway, is this a form of PPD? What should I do? Meds and counseling are out of the question for us right now as I don't have insurance once my maternity medicaid runs out. We're on such a tight budget that we couldn't even do sliding scale right now.
Is there something else I can do to alleviate some of these problems?
