Was Emergency room necessary?

[dovey]

I felt so annoyed with myself by the end of the day, not knowing if I had done the right thing.

So, we were sitting in a restaurant with my dcs' little cousin and her parents. We hardly ever get to see them, and we had a few days with them. My ds (3 yrs old) said that he had a tummy-ache, so I took him out to the car to lie down. Within about 10 minutes, he was crying in pain, and then he couldn't comfortably sit down without curling up. Then he was screaming in agony. I got my partner out of the restaurant, and we drove to the hospital with my ds in my lap alternately screaming and resting.

When we got to the ER it was really full. They took my ds in about 10 minutes because he was in so much pain. He couldn't sit down or stand up or be held. After we checked in, the first nurse to see him was pretty rude. He told my son after looking at him - "It may have worked this time, but it's not going to work every time." As if my ds was faking it or something. Then the doctor came in, my ds threw up, they took a few x-rays and his blood, then my ds fell asleep. When he woke up, he was fine, as if nothing had happened. We waited for a few hours, and the doctor said that there was nothing wrong with him, except he had a lot of poo in his lower intestine. I felt so foolish. In retrospect I can see that we should have just waited, and he would have been fine, but I don't know what I should have done. I felt badly for spoiling the day that my son would have had with his cousin by panicking that way.

[JanB]

I don't think you did the wrong thing. Your instincts were telling you that something was seriously wrong with your child, and you took him to get help. I bet you would feel differently about your experience if you hadn't run into ER staff that treated you like crap. Accusing a child of faking an illness to have to go to the ER is obnoxious, unprofessional, and furthermore doesn't even make sense -- what small child wants to go to the freaking ER? Especially a 3yo who isn't even missing school?

Don't beat yourself up about this. I think I would have done the exact same thing, and frankly I would be very unhappy with my treatment by the ER staff. You have a child who is screaming in pain, for goodness' sake -- how are you supposed to know whether it is just a temporary tummy upset or something more serious? I think you absolutely did the right thing.

[chlaal]

Honestly, I probably would have done the same. It's so hard with a 3yo because while they have words, they can't necessarily describe what they're feeling with any accuracy, especially when they're in pain. It COULD have been appendicitis or similar, and how were you to know? And if you had waited, it could have gotten worse.

Don't beat yourself up over it. All's well that ends well! I'm just glad he is okay.

-Joan

[MidwifeErika]

YOu didn't do anything wrong. Your child was sick and you brought them in to be checked out. Sometimes we end up brining our kids in when it isn't needed to be on the safe side. When my oldest was a baby there was a night she started wheezing and coughing a horrible cough. She had been a preemie, so I was very concerned. I rushed her to the ER at 3am to have them take a look. She had croup, that was all. My child who had seemed so sick at home was grinning away at every person who came near her in the ER. I was embarassed that I was so panicked for what turned out to be nothing really, but sometimes that just happens as a parent.

[eclipse]

You didn't do anything wrong, but that nurse sure did. I'd probably be calling and reading them the riot act, as well as filing a formal complaint. Would she have said that to a 30 year old?

[Lovenest]

Uh, I cant stand doctors that are rude to kids.. Gez your sons 3?! Hes not going to fake a tummy ache that involves having to go the the ER!:

I would have done the same thing most likely. I think you should always follow your mamas intuition. If something was wrong with him you would have been saving his life.

BIG for you mama!

[laohaire]

I would have done the same. And, like PP's ... wow, that nurse was totally out of line.

[LynnS6]

Originally Posted by dovey

Then he was screaming in agony. I got my partner out of the restaurant, and we drove to the hospital with my ds in my lap alternately screaming and resting.

You took your son, who in your own words, was SCREAMING IN AGONY to the ER, and you're feeling guilty?

Nope. Anyone who is screaming in agony deserves to be seen by a doctor.

And I would DEFINITELY call the hospital and file a complaint against that nurse. Why on earth would your son be faking something? Like he WANTED to be in the ER?

[onlyzombiecat]

If he hadn't been fine and you didn't take him in wouldn't you be feeling worse right now? I think most people with a 3 year old child in agony would take them for medical attention.
That staff was rude to treat your son and you that way.

[Jenny_Jane]

I would have done the same thing. Kids can get what seems to be a horrible stomach ake and it can be or might just be a little poo. Once my dd had a small head ake nothing to big kept her from school it got worse she had neck pains high fever it sounded to me like meningitis. I took her in she was only 5yo so when she described it was my tummy and my neck hurt real bad the nurse realy made me mad she said yes she has a fever but I beleive shes faking it, a five yr old or three yr old does not fake a little sad face and thtat kind pain. In the end she did have Viral Meningitis my point is no matter how little the pain if it hurts to the point were our dc are screaming it's right to get them checked out just for the piece of mind

[Cheshire]

You did the right thing. And, I agree, you should call the hospital and find out how to file a formal complaint against the nurse.

I'm so glad your son is feeling better and it wasn't anything serious.

[newcastlemama]

You did not know. That is why you took him to the ER! I probably would have done the same.

I took ds in at 1.5 yo because he landed head first onto concrete from 5 feet up. The childless intake nurse asked if this was my first baby and inferred that over time I would become less paranoid: That is when I asked her how many children she had! He ended up being fine, but what if he was not?

s Jen

[momuveight2B]

Of course I would have done the same thing! What if there had been a bowel obstruction or ruptured appendix? The nurse was out of line. It is just crazy that a nurse would think a three year old would be plotting to get attention in this way.

[laohaire]

What is it with these nurses??????????

[hottmama]

I'll be the dissenting voice here and say that I wouldn't take my son to the ER for a stomachache. I have never taken either of my kids (4 and 14 mos.) to the ER and like to wait things out. I'm just not an emergency room type of mom (or patient). If it was clearly an emergency (gaping wound, obvious concussion, etc) I would of course take them, but for sickness, I wait it out for a day or so and try to take them to the ped. during regular hours.

[Lovenest]

Originally Posted by hottmama

I'll be the dissenting voice here and say that I wouldn't take my son to the ER for a stomachache. I have never taken either of my kids (4 and 14 mos.) to the ER and like to wait things out. I'm just not an emergency room type of mom (or patient). If it was clearly an emergency (gaping wound, obvious concussion, etc) I would of course take them, but for sickness, I wait it out for a day or so and try to take them to the ped. during regular hours.

Im with you on not taking a child for a stomach ache, but this child was "alternately screaming and resting".. that could have been more than a stomach ache. My son has had some bad tummy bugs but never screamed.. he may have cried but not screamed. I guess each child is different. But, I would have to take my son if he was screaming as thats not normal for him.

Ok, off my soapbox!

[Unreal]

Originally Posted by hottmama

I'll be the dissenting voice here and say that I wouldn't take my son to the ER for a stomachache. I have never taken either of my kids (4 and 14 mos.) to the ER and like to wait things out. I'm just not an emergency room type of mom (or patient). If it was clearly an emergency (gaping wound, obvious concussion, etc) I would of course take them, but for sickness, I wait it out for a day or so and try to take them to the ped. during regular hours.

I would definitely wait out a stomach ache. But anything that made one of the kids scream, and I would take them in.
BUT....none of mine are screamers. My oldest will whine, my second is one of those that will take care of himself, thank-you-very-much, and our youngest doesn't even scream when he pinches his fingers in a drawer--he just calls out for me with a pitiful mamamamama

so to me a scream in pain type of thing would definitely signal an ER trip.

We all know our kids and their signals, kwim?

Either way, I'm really glad it wasn't something more serious

[GooeyRN]

I would take my dd if she were screaming in agony. Fussing/whining, no. I would let that wait. But actual screaming, I would take her.

[onlyzombiecat]

Originally Posted by hottmama

I'll be the dissenting voice here and say that I wouldn't take my son to the ER for a stomachache. I have never taken either of my kids (4 and 14 mos.) to the ER and like to wait things out. I'm just not an emergency room type of mom (or patient). If it was clearly an emergency (gaping wound, obvious concussion, etc) I would of course take them, but for sickness, I wait it out for a day or so and try to take them to the ped. during regular hours.

We are also not people who run to a doctor or ER. My dd has actually never been to the ER. I feel it is better to go if your child is screaming with pain and have it not be serious then to not go when it turns out to be serious.

[Ravin]

I think you did the right thing. And I totally think you should contact the hospital ombudsman or patient service rep or whatever they call it at that hospital and complain loudly and in writing. That nurse was WAY out of line. My 3 yo. has on occasion faked not feeling well--she says she has an owie or her tummy hurts but with no actual signs of discomfort. It's different from when she's really not feeling well, and if she were screaming in pain alternating with being listless and hurting too much to be held, I'd be rushing her in, too! Unless you have a home x-ray machine, you don't know if it's constipation, gas, or a blocked intestine or appenix or something else quite serious. I once went with my sister to take my 3 yo. niece to the ER because of her breathing, which turned out to be croup. Now that we know what it sounds like, her DD or mine would get a visit to a steamy bathroom before resorting to urgent care, but at that time she was a young mama and I was childless and we erred on the side of caution.

You were right, that nurse was wrong.