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Would this make anyone else angry?

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
So I have had 3 m/c one at 5 wks and 2 at 9 wks. Well the other day I was talking to my dad on the phone about not wanting to go to work. He said well you should probably work as much as possible now because when the baby comes you won'tbe working anymore. I said yeah but I plan on working through the whole pregnancy. He said Yeah but with you that may only be another week or two. and then he laughed. I was floored. I didn't know what to say. I would never say that to anyone even if they had never lost a pregnancy. Grrr.....:
post #2 of 23
Wow, just wow. That is kind of a heartless thing to say. I am so sorry. I suppose he thought he was making a lame joke. I suppose you could mention to him how much that hurt you. I am just floored. Hugs to you mama!
post #3 of 23
Angry, and incredibly hurt. What a cruel thing to say. Maybe he was trying to make light of an uncomfortable situation, but still... I am so sorry.
post #4 of 23

sorry hun, what an innsensitive thing to say
post #5 of 23
oh my goodness! that's an awful thing to say...my only thought it some people cope with fear/sadness by making (often callous) jokes. HUGS!
post #6 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by stacey2061 View Post
oh my goodness! that's an awful thing to say...my only thought it some people cope with fear/sadness by making (often callous) jokes. HUGS!
I think the same thing. (((Hugs))) I know that hurt you, it would hurt me too. Some people just dont understand that m/cs hurt...more than physically.
post #7 of 23
I would be absolutely stunned. For a minute, and then I would probably lay into him. What a horrible, insensitive thing to say.
post #8 of 23
Is he usually so callous? If not, I would chalk it up to a moment. It's terribly hurtful, but not said with the intention to hurt you. Only you would know how to categorize his comment. I would definitely mention it to him- he might have realized he said something awful and just skipped over it in hopes it would pass unnoticed (take it from me, the professional lol)

post #9 of 23
That's the worst joke ever!!!
post #10 of 23
How terribly insensitive! I would definitely talk to him and tell him how much it hurt you, and request that he be more sensitive in the future.
post #11 of 23
Oh...my...goodness. I am so sorry, mama!
post #12 of 23
post #13 of 23
Definitely! I'm so sorry. I can only suggest that the others are right, he didn't know what to say and is worried about you and it came out all wrong. I hope that's all it is.

I know when we told my FIL about DS, I was something like 15 weeks along. He said he was surprised we were telling people so soon, he didn't think I should tell until I was showing in case "something happened" as he didn't think he'd want to share that info, if it were him. I said I hoped I could turn to my family if that was the case, but was thinking, nice reaction, grandpa! So we are in no hurry to tell him about this one at all But then he's not a real sensitive guy, hopefully that is not the issue in your case.

Sticky vibes for you!!!
post #14 of 23
Horrible! I would burst into tears and then hang up the phone, after he heard how much he upset me.
post #15 of 23
did you want to just go through the phone and smack him?

I'm so sorry. He really didn't know what he was saying. It's an older man thing. I could picture my father saying the same thing and thinking nothing of it.

THink sticky and let it all just roll off you!
post #16 of 23
Wow that really was a horrid thing to say. Sometimes people blurt out things before thinking. I am so sorry.
post #17 of 23
Wow...I'm so sorry.
post #18 of 23
That's just terrible, terrible. I'd be very hurt and very angry. Let him know it hurt you so that he doesn't make similar comments in the future. Think sticky, mama
post #19 of 23
That is an awful thing to say. Make sure to let him know it hurt you so he can be sure not to say something like that again. That stinks!
post #20 of 23
It never ceases to amaze me the hurtful things others say, even when they are people who 'love ' us.
I've heard alot of rotten things concerning my losses too .
I'm sorry he said that to you. Many .

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