Hi all,
My boyfriend, who had celiac disease - probably had seizures due to the celiac disease. Recently, he had multiple seizures one night and did not make it. At the moment, I thought he was having regular seizures that he usually comes out of - this time it wasn't the same. After he had 3 and stopped breathing (or his heart stopped, I don't know which), I called 911.
I'm having a hard time and wondering if I did the right thing, if I waited too long, or if I couldn't have done anything. He had status epilepticus, which is when the person can't recuperate between seizures and it ends up being a very dire situation. I didn't know that at the time.
Anyway, if I know a lot about regular epilepsy, a bit about celiac disease, but not the combination of the two. I am grieving for my boyfriend's loss - we probably would have been engaged or married this year or next.
Any help would be appreciated - I just feel like I could crawl into a hole and die myself. This life doesn't seem worth it without him - thinking that his death is partly my fault is worse too.
People have suggested grief counseling, but not sure where to go that is non-religious. I am having a hard time coping at all. We were going to spend our lives together, and I don't even know if he's out there or if there's nothing after we die. What am I supposed to do now? I am going absolutely batty not being able to talk to him or hold him. It's concerning my friends and family and of course, me. Nothing seems worth it now. He is my home, and I just feel lost without him.
My boyfriend, who had celiac disease - probably had seizures due to the celiac disease. Recently, he had multiple seizures one night and did not make it. At the moment, I thought he was having regular seizures that he usually comes out of - this time it wasn't the same. After he had 3 and stopped breathing (or his heart stopped, I don't know which), I called 911.
I'm having a hard time and wondering if I did the right thing, if I waited too long, or if I couldn't have done anything. He had status epilepticus, which is when the person can't recuperate between seizures and it ends up being a very dire situation. I didn't know that at the time.
Anyway, if I know a lot about regular epilepsy, a bit about celiac disease, but not the combination of the two. I am grieving for my boyfriend's loss - we probably would have been engaged or married this year or next.
Any help would be appreciated - I just feel like I could crawl into a hole and die myself. This life doesn't seem worth it without him - thinking that his death is partly my fault is worse too.
People have suggested grief counseling, but not sure where to go that is non-religious. I am having a hard time coping at all. We were going to spend our lives together, and I don't even know if he's out there or if there's nothing after we die. What am I supposed to do now? I am going absolutely batty not being able to talk to him or hold him. It's concerning my friends and family and of course, me. Nothing seems worth it now. He is my home, and I just feel lost without him.
: In my rational mind, I can't think that stressing somebody out can actually cause somebody's death and "he didn't want to come back from it" like his mother said. I know for a fact that I made him happy and took care of him. We had our ups and downs, but we just seemed to be made for each other. He had one seizure, called me over at 1:45 in the middle of the night, and we briefly talked - but it wasn't anything really meaningful. That's the last I talked to him, because he had two back to back seizures about 20-30 minutes after that and he couldn't be revived after the 3rd. So I was the only one there before the emergency team came.
I'm so sorry. I have no words...
