pre- ppd during pregnancy?

[bbrandonsmom]

I don't even know if there is such a thing but I thought I'd ask here. With ds I only had some blues and lots of stress until my mil left and I was fine. And I was fine through him turning one, then us buying a house last May and then when we found out we were pregnant in Oct it feels like I'm slowely losing it. I know that's a lot of stress over the past 2 years, but some days....And it's getting worse. It seems anything slightly stressfull that comes up it's almost like I can't deal with it. Some days I think it would be better to not be preg, and that's such a horrible thought. We're having to self pay and it's so much stress and paychecks it's like, "well, what do I not buy at the grocery store", and that's hard to do being preg and having a growing toddler. And I've tried telling my dh that I feel like I'm having a nervouse breakdown or on top of one and he says it will all work out and that crying isn't going to help anything. I mean could this be a little ppd working up? Now I'm worried that because I feel like this I will have ppd after the baby, but who knows.

[Individuation]

I couldn't read and not respond, even though I'm at school and this has to be quick.

Ante-partum depression is real and probably more common than post-partum depression. It really doesn't get the attention it deserves. Don't blame yourself, try to get some help, and take things easy. I know the stress feels like too much to handle.

[PiePie]

I sort of came unravelled too, at 13w, although you could argue that it was building for months...yes, the pregnant months. pregnancy is a life-changing event, so even when we want the baby, it shouldn't be surprising that it brings up old unresolved stuff, and requires MAJOR adjustments in relationships, $, sense of self, etc., which are hard to get used to. I don't know if the hormones make it extra hard or what. Just wanted to commiserate, don't have a cure.

[airmide_m]

I'm so sorry!! I can't relate (still ttc my first) but I've experienced depression already in ttc and worrying about being a good parent etc. It does sound like you're going through a really stressful time!

Are there any ways you could get some practical help? You could find out if Birthright or your local Crisis Pregnancy Center or Pregnancy Resource Center have any support available, either emotional support or financial. They might be able to find financial support (for baby items, food etc.) for your family, or even free or very low-cost counseling or something like that.

Maybe you could talk with leaders of any groups you're a part of (hobbies, church etc.) and/or post in your Finding Your Tribe area and see if anyone might know of someone who would volunteer a little time as a Mother's Helper, to keep an eye on your toddler while you take a nap, read a book or whatever would help you unwind and have some "you" time? Could be a young teenager, or first time expecting mom who want some experience learning to care for a child in a safe supervised way, or another mother who could bring her kids over and supervise a "playdate".

Good luck dealing with everything and I hope you feel better soon!

[Anglyn]

I had to reply, no real advice, I just saw the title and wanted to know the answer myself, I was like that with my last baby which is why I really debated on if I should even have THIS one, I was afraid of it happening again. I was depressed from about my last trimester until the baby was maybe three or four months old. So, yeah, Im sure its real. Dont be afraid to reach out to someone, if your dh isnt supportive, find someone who is! I think my dh might have been, but I just suffered in silence because thats what I do. I didnt want to admit I was depressed because I dont know....I guess I thought it made me seem ungrateful for the child we had tried so hard to concieve? It wasnt until AFTER the fact that I could look back an think, yeah, I was depressed.

Good Luck to you!

[Slackermom]

When I was about 5 months pg with DS (baby #2), I became seriously depressed. I couldn't imagine why -- everything in my life seemed to be going so well, and I was thrilled to be pregnant again after suffering two m/c. I went to therapy, but quit as soon as I started feeling a bit better.

I wish I'd taken it more seriously, because I was hit with a very bad PPD when DS was about 4 months old, and didn't seek help until I really hit bottom when he was a year old.

If you're experiencing depression, anxiety or panic attacks during pregnancy, please get some help. As a previous poster stated, ante-partum depression is really quite common, although not talked about.

[RootSnort]

Pregnancy depression 'is missed':

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/6403537.stm

[mirthfulmum]

YES!!! I know exactly what you are going through.
Some days I'm okay and I can roll with the punches, but most days if just the smallest amount of stress comes into my day I'm a mess. I just can't deal with anything. I don't really want to socialize, I force myself to so that my boys get some social time, I am a snappy and grouchy mom and wife, and I don't want to even think about the mounting bills (DH's been laid off for a few months and looking for work), the fact that we'll probably have to sell our home this spring, that we actually do have another human being entering our lives in a few short months.

I too struggle with regret over getting pregnant again. I feel awful. I don't want my unborn child to discover that I ever doubted her for an instant. But I do.

Your not alone bbrandonsmom. And I am relieved myslef to see a thread on the very subject I came looking for here.

[PiePie]

how is everybody doing? i am not starting out on a good foot this morning. last wednesday i interviewed for a job i really want and need, and the phone rang, and i was sure it was a reference teling me they had been contacted, but no, just a spam call...

[mistisa]

Just wanted to add my support for you mama. I am going through the exact same thing. I feel bad for wishing at times to not be pregnant - because this one wasn't planned and the first two were. Sometimes I feel like I am going to lose it, but I have to keep it together for my family. I want to get help, but that's just not something I do, you know? I actually wouldn't even know where to start, who to go see. So I am glad to see that I am not alone in this...

[mirthfulmum]

Originally Posted by PiePie

how is everybody doing? i am not starting out on a good foot this morning. last wednesday i interviewed for a job i really want and need, and the phone rang, and i was sure it was a reference teling me they had been contacted, but no, just a spam call...

Oh yuck, it feels so crappy to get your expectations up and then have nothing to show for it

Dh has been job hunting for about 6 weeks now and it is so frustrating. Everytime the phone rings and it's not a number I recognize I get so excited thinking it might be a job offer, but it hasn't been yet.