Originally Posted by openheart
We are a TV free, no video, No licensed characters toys, clothes etc.. Family. We want our daughter (4 yrs) to just play without being a target of advertising or having someone else's image in her mind. ( i.e. a licensed character) She never uses the word bored. We go see many performances that are just plain fun for kids. We aspire to Waldorf philosophy that the Grimm fairytales are for a later age when she can understand them. Right now, she is in the world of make believe and is very innocent. She does not know of ToysRUs nor has she ever eaten at McD's. She has some wooden toys but mostly just regular household items as toys. No Plastic.
Elaine : )
I'm very much in agreement with this!
We are similar in our feelings about TV, commercialism, etc and we are big fans of Waldorf (my dd will start in K in Sept, looking forward)
CDNMOM: I have to say that I'm with you on most of your opinions as well. I agree that children are extremely sensitive to their environment, all of their senses are much more sensitive than adults and as adults I think it's so easy to forget this. It makes total sense to me that in your sister's case, as in many women's cases, that media greatly influenced her self-image. I do feel that there are other factors involved of course (as you mentioned) but the influence of the media should not be taken lightly.
I also fail to see where Velochic was being rude. I see strong words and opinions but I see that in other posts as well.
Mamabeca: I think you brought up a very important point. Sometimes things are tough and people do things that they don't mean to or they never thought they would. I see this more now that I have 2 children. With one child, a supportive dh, no money troubles, no health issues, family and friends around, etc it was much easier to say "I would never do.....". But add any kind of real stress to the already stressful job of being a parent and sometimes ideals fall by the wayside. Are these compromises of values? I suppose they are to a certain extent but sometimes other things take priority such as a sick child or the mental health of mom, etc.
I do think though that it's a little strange that the one example you have of a family with no TV for their dc displays them as being kind of freaky. Do you know any other children who are not exposed to TV or media?
I know lots of them and I can say, unequivocally, that I can totally tell the difference in the play of children who have been exposed to large amounts of media from those who haven't. And the older they get the more obvious this difference is.
I think throughout this thread the thing that I take the most issue with is the overall attitude that TV and movies are OK for children (content is not so relevant).
Tell me what positive thing is to be gained from allowing your dc to be exposed to TV? Movies? A 5 year old has NO WAY of grasping the meaning of what is going on in a movie!! Not to say that that alone is a compelling reason not to show any movies, but please don't think they actually understand what is going on.
Children (lets say about 7 and under) were meant to learn by moving, feeling, interacting, and imitation. Any time they spend plopped in front of a box in a trance-like state (or even mimicking the actions of the figures in the box) is taking away from their real learning and their play. Do some real research on how children learn and on the importance of free-play. TV is not mentioned!
Now you may say it's fun, but so is eating ice cream for breakfast and writing with magic marker all over your body.
In most cases, there are no compelling reasons to show any media to your dc, regardless of content. And there is definately going to be some damage.
I've heard countless people say, "my child did/didn't do this and he turned out just fine...". This may be true (and I often hear it in reference to bfeeding) to a certain extent......just as letting your kid write with magic marker all over her body, the occasional TV viewing probably isn't going to do too much damage. But to me the important thing is attitude. Do you realize what you're doing is not so good but do it anyway because you just can't help it or you're stressed out, etc? I think we can all relate to this. Or do you know it's not so good but brush it off as being OK?
How many people let their dc eat at McDonalds? To me TV/movies for dc is the same as that. It's not good for you but sometimes it just happens for some.
People do things that are not in the best interests for their children all the time. I include myself in that group of course! I sometimes let my dd eat ice cream, sometimes I bad-talk other drivers on the road, sometimes I yell, etc, but I do not deny that these things are bad for my dds. I know they are, I do my best to curb them.
I also don't think that those who manage to never show TV or never take their dc to McDs or never scream at their dc, or who bfeed, are trying to be superior or to flaunt it (although some do I'm sure). I think that when we do things that we know are not so good and we deny that and then see others managing to avoid it, then we feel a little judged.
OK, I'm not saying everyone does this but I definately have seen lots of this! Just by saying you had a natural birth you get others on the defensive, just by saying you never show TV or fed formula, you get others on the defensive......
And as for Disney? Please......I'm mad at Disney for making people think that princessess are bad, or wanting to be a princess is bad, or that pink is a bad color or that wanting to get married to a prince is bad!!
My answer to all that is read Grimms, read other fairy tales!! You'll never need TV or Disney again! Fairy tales are teaching your children all kinds of lessons, repeat the stories over and over again (don't worry about the gore, your dc probably won't mind it as long as you don't make a big deal of it) and let the morals and life lessons slowly sink into your child's soul (mind). Disney has taken these beautiful, powerful and meaningful tales and warped them to the point of irrecognition (if that's a word).
All the images that you expose your dc to through TV or a movie (especially under 7) will make imprints on his/her mind. Like a stamp, hard to remove. With reading stories your dc will form these mental images himself/herself (a little help is good like sparse illustrations or puppetry) and they will be 1000 times more creative and fantastic than anything that some Disney guy decided to plant in his/her head.
and most of all, it will be 1000 times more satisfying for your dc. when it comes down to it, TV and movies drain the soul(mind), and life and real stories feed it.